marrty24 Posted November 7, 2007 Posted November 7, 2007 When is it ok to contact your ex? My ex broke up with me over 3 months ago, and we had a falling out since. Basically, about two and half months ago she led me on one night out, and then the next day said it was all a mistake. I was extremely hurt by this, but all it did was make me want her more. She has even blamed me for some terrible stuff that has happened to her, and sent me the bill for a flat tire she thought I gave her which was very suprising and hilarious at the same time that she thinks I would do that. I think blamed me because it makes it easier for her to get over me. Probably the largest reason why we broke up was because of her mother, who for some reason has never liked me. I think because I was taking away all she has left, and the mother is afraid to be alone. I don't think I love this girl anymore but I do still have feelings for her and care about her. I would like to contact her and see how she is doing but I'm afraid she will not even have a conversation with me. I'm not saying I want to get back with her, but I would consider it if it were a possibility. How should I go about contacting her? If even at all. Also how do you deal with a mother that does not like you despite all the good things the daughter has to say about you, and how the daughter feels about you.
Stereogram Posted November 8, 2007 Posted November 8, 2007 It seems to be a lost cause. You've got the psychotic mother not liking you, and then the ex that you are not sure of....but all signs point to her not being to keen on you either. I'd leave them alone...they don't care about you...you shouldn't care about them. I know I'm sounding harsh here...but I'm sick of the nice guys like you being treated like ****ing punching bags. I'll give you an example of something I did. I got this hot girl's number earlier this summer. She was a co-worker of mine who recently got divorced and it got through the grapevine at work that I was interested in her. She initiated things and we talked on the phone for a couple weeks...and then all of sudden she stopped talking to me without an explanation. I sent her an email maybe a month ago to check on her to see if she's OK..and I was only being nice. She didn't even write me back. I felt like complete loser for being caring...and totally embarrassed myself. Only try contacting this girl if you want to feel embarrassed.
gonetildecember Posted November 8, 2007 Posted November 8, 2007 If you simply want to contact her for the sake of seeing how she is doing, then send her an e-mail or letter...keep it simple...no talking about what went wrong and all that.. just ask her how she is doing.. say she crossed your mind and just wanted to check on her. BUT like the first one you sent she may not respond.. she might not have been ready then and may be now, but you may have to face the fact that she just might not want contact. If you want to contact her for the sake of pursuing something... I would give it some more time.. Do the NC thing until you're able to control your feelings and won't be as hurt if things don't work out the way you want them to.
Ocean-Blue Posted November 8, 2007 Posted November 8, 2007 I'd recommend that you not contact her. Why reopen old wounds? She's still on your mind... Let it go.
Author marrty24 Posted November 9, 2007 Author Posted November 9, 2007 She actually hasn't been on my mind until recently. I've been dating other women for a couple of months, and enjoying it very much. It was weird how she came back into my head, I guess I still do care about her. Its not like it was before though, I don't "need" her I just care about how she is doing. Maybe its a horrible idea to contact her but then again maybe it isn't. You never know unless you try.
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