ninjaturtles Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 Is it possible for a guy to leave a committed relationship because he wants to be free and single? He would trade his relationship for fun etc..... Does that simply point to the fact that he does not love the girl anyway, cos if he loved her he would forgo any urge to be single and stick through in the relationship? 2) Maybe he has feelings for her but not strong enough to fight the urges to be single? Would really appreciate opinions from as many as possible..trying to find closure i guess. Thanx in advance.xx
alwayshurt Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 never in the world "anybody" (male or female) would leave a person whom he/she in love. I would not do it. However, it depends also on the level of maturity. I can see that happened in a young person, below 30. Although, I have read posts of young guys griefing for having been left by their mates. Generally speaking, I don't believe anybody would trade the good for the less and if they did they're not worth your attentions, love and respect.
Amy22 Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 I do think a someone can leave a commited relationship and still love the person. I think whatever the reason they leave has to be more important then the love they have for the person. Whether that means they don't love the person enough, they don't want the commitment or they are confused and need time to themselves to figure out what they want and during that time they decide it is best to move on. I also think sometimes people realize that no matter how much they love someone the relationship will just not work. I think those people hurt just as much as the one they broke up with because they still love the person, they just know due to circumstances that it won't work. Hope that answered you questions.
reboot Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 Maybe he doesn't love her, or maybe he does but he's just too young and/or immature to be ready for a commited relationship. You women have to understand men mature emotionally much later than you do as a general rule. And then there are some of us just stay emotional retards forever.
Amy22 Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 never in the world "anybody" (male or female) would leave a person whom he/she in love. I would not do it. However, it depends also on the level of maturity. I can see that happened in a young person, below 30. Although, I have read posts of young guys griefing for having been left by their mates. Generally speaking, I don't believe anybody would trade the good for the less and if they did they're not worth your attentions, love and respect. I just wanted to say I love my ex with all my heart. But I left him. Because of the lies and the way he treated me. There are reasons that someone would leave someone they love. I won't repost my story here but it was something I had to do myself even though I loved him. I thought I was going to marry him. I put my house on the market (still isn't haven't been able to call the realtor yet) and I told my job that I was leaving, now I have to find a new job. I did those things because I loved him and wanted to be with him. But I am not going to stay with someone I love if they treat me badly. Just because someone leaves does not mean they don't love you.
pinktiger Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 Amy22, you answered my questions. Thank you so much!
alwayshurt Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 I just wanted to say I love my ex with all my heart. But I left him. Because of the lies and the way he treated me. There are reasons that someone would leave someone they love. I won't repost my story here but it was something I had to do myself even though I loved him. I thought I was going to marry him. I put my house on the market (still isn't haven't been able to call the realtor yet) and I told my job that I was leaving, now I have to find a new job. I did those things because I loved him and wanted to be with him. But I am not going to stay with someone I love if they treat me badly. Just because someone leaves does not mean they don't love you. Amy, I agree with you. But your circumstances are different from Ninja's original post. She's asking if somebody would leave the person he/she loves because he/she wants to be single and have fun. If I am hurt or I believe there are some issue with the woman I love I would definetely leave just because It won't take me nowhere other than causing me pains. But I would never leave her because I need to be single and hang out with my friends. Must be really immature to do that.
Amy22 Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 But I would never leave her because I need to be single and hang out with my friends. Must be really immature to do that. I do agree with that.
Author ninjaturtles Posted November 5, 2007 Author Posted November 5, 2007 Thanks everyone for you answers, would like more ..the more the merrier..lol:p Amy, i quite understand what you mean..in the past i was in a relationship, i loved him and knew i should leave but was not strong enough to do it...When it ended due to distance, a part of me was relieved that the rollercoaster of emotions were gone..although i mourned for a very long time etc. thanx for your input... Hurting(hope i got the name right.lol)- you're right he is only 22 years...and he just started his post grad in a new city full,known for its bubbly student life and women...also about 3 hrs away by train. From what i hear, he is having a lot of fun:sick:..I guess that what he wants..it hurts tho... To the other posts(forgotten the names..lol) I guess maturity does come into play....he did not seem to keen on commiting to seeing eachother 2ce a month(at the weekends). We had this talk about the arrangements just b4 he moved cities..but in all honesty he was not keen on agreeing to that, even though of course it did not have to be fixed...i guess i should have noticed his reluctance but just brushed it off. A part of me knows that some times guys wanna have fun...i only wish he loved me enough to forgo these urges...I wish him well, he is young..i dont want to be with someone who feels tied down cos he really does not want to be with me.... I guess i thought his feelings were much stronger..oh well:sick: keep posting and thanx for all your imput everyone! without LS..i would have done so many things wrong plus i may not have started moving on.xxxxx
brothermartin Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 I just wanted to say I love my ex with all my heart. But I left him. Because of the lies and the way he treated me. There are reasons that someone would leave someone they love. I won't repost my story here but it was something I had to do myself even though I loved him. I thought I was going to marry him. I put my house on the market (still isn't haven't been able to call the realtor yet) and I told my job that I was leaving, now I have to find a new job. I did those things because I loved him and wanted to be with him. But I am not going to stay with someone I love if they treat me badly. Just because someone leaves does not mean they don't love you. My ex left me because I could'nt/would'nt change into someone that never had an issue with money.(Yeah, that's realistic) My point is, yes, a person can love you and still leave for reasons that may seem silly to you, but seems very justifyable to them.
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