bigbuck Posted November 4, 2007 Posted November 4, 2007 I just recently had a break up with a girlfriend that I have known for 7 years but have only been dating about 3 months. Basically I overcrowded her, was jealous of other guys talking to her, and was just too attached to her. Anyway I broke contact with her for about 4 days then I decided to text her and said if were not going to make this work can we at least be friends? She replied with we can be friends...it will be wierd though because there can be no feelings. So I agreed to that because this girl is just one of the coolest, funnest people I have ever known so I dont want to break off completely from her. Anyway I asked her if she wanted to go have a few drinks and we ended up doing that. At the end of the night I dropped her off at home and went back to my house...all went well. The next day I texted her and she said I am going out again tonight if you want to come along...so again I went. We had fun...it was hard to watch her dance with other guys at first but then It didnt really bother me as it went on. Then she started bragging to me about this married cop that was calling her...that kinda made me a little mad but I just blew that off as well. All her friends keep telling me I hope you two work things out. Im not gonna lie...I still have feelings for her and I dont know how to cope with that. It will more than likely be a few days before we hang out again. If I want her back should I just not call her...and let her call or text me? I forgot to mention during our breakup I was still on her very top friends list on myspace and I am still her top friend on myspace. Do you think she wants me back? Or is it friends for good? Why would she want to try and make me jealous? Is it some kind of sick and twisted test to see if I can change? Should I take her off my top friends list on myspace if I want her back? HELP?
Author bigbuck Posted November 5, 2007 Author Posted November 5, 2007 Sorry about the title to this thread being marked as "so". For some reason it wouldnt let me post with the title I wanted
ninjaturtles Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 Anyway I broke contact with her for about 4 days then I decided to text her and said if were not going to make this work can we at least be friends? She replied with we can be friends sounds like she wants to be friends.. ...it was hard to watch her dance with other guys at first but then It didnt really bother me as it went on. Then she started bragging to me about this married cop that was calling her sounds like she wants to be friends I forgot to mention during our breakup I was still on her very top friends list on myspace and I am still her top friend on myspace sounds like she still wants to be your friend It doesnt matter if you're still on her top friend;s list..afterall thats exactly what she wants..to be your friend! Since you still have feeling for her, you need to stop hanging out with her for a bit...unless you can handle hangin out with her as a friend and only a friend..at this point can u? If she wants to be with you, she would be..have you tried talking to her about changes..ie. u not being so jealous etc? If you have, then just move on(i hate that phrase)...lol But yea, if you cant handle being her friend right now, then just chill out on hanging out with her so often...etc. xx
Author bigbuck Posted November 5, 2007 Author Posted November 5, 2007 Update: She called me over last night to ask if I could watch her kid so she could be with her brother. I know for a fact that she does not get to see her brother often so I said yes. She was nice when she got back and said that I could stay there since I had to work early and I stayed downstairs...she stayed upstairs. You are right I am just making things worse for myself. I cant handle just being her friend. How can it go from being so good to one day everything changes? On my left at this very moment there is a book in her house called ITs called a Breakup because its Broken...lol. Yes I have talked to her about changing my ways but she has mentioned nothing of it. I just dont know what to do. Should I tell her I still have feelings for her and I dont know what to do?
amaysngrace Posted November 5, 2007 Posted November 5, 2007 I think she is your friend which is cool if you hope for anything more in the future. So keep being her friend. And practice detachment from your feelings if you can. You can do it by rationalizing. Don't question how a three month love affair managed to go south so quickly but question how you're letting a three month love affair damage a seven year friendship. Get back to the friendship in your head. And when you're ready start seeing other girls. I'm sure you've had girlfriends in the past seven years right? This friendship didn't stop you before. So why are you letting it stop you now???
Author bigbuck Posted November 5, 2007 Author Posted November 5, 2007 I understand what your all saying here..but I mean it was a very serious relationship....marriage was even talked about and according to her I overcroweded her...which is the reason we broke up. Is it just me or is overcrowding something you should talk about or just break up because of it?
Author bigbuck Posted November 6, 2007 Author Posted November 6, 2007 Update: We decided we are better off being good friends..and she was honest with me. She told me that I am to nice of a guy and am not very assertive. Basically I am easy to pushover.
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