Endearment Posted November 4, 2007 Posted November 4, 2007 I hate confrontation and today just gave me the worst reality check so far of my whole entire life. I was suppose to go to the movies with this guy today and I was super excited and so was he. We were really infatuated with each other. But then my parents, who are normally okay with each other, started arguing. It all of a sudden gotten blown out of proportion when my father tried to smack me and I ended up feeling so vulnerable and it went downhill. My dad went crazy stating he was going to leave the house and stuff. We were all used to the fact he would start all this drama. It suddenly went to going to another country and separating for a few months. By this time the date I had with the guy was the last thing on my mind. I started crying about what had happened and the whole time the guy was calling me. I fell asleep while I was crying and it's been at least 10 hours now. I haven't had the guts to explain to him what happened. I'm way too scared. What should I do? I'm prideful but I know that what I did was horrible and I should do something. But nothing that I say or do will take it what I did away. Everything is riling up on me and I'm super stressed. I've been TRYING so hard to forgive myself and be able t swallow it upa nd explain EVERYTHING to him.
Monty P Posted November 4, 2007 Posted November 4, 2007 I am not the greatest with relationship advise, but a close friend of mine is going through a similar situation as you are with her family, and I very much understand what you are going through. I believe the most important thing is that you take the time that you need to sort through what has happened. As for how or what to tell the guy. I don't think you should have to explain everything to him. At least not yet. Not until you are ready. It depends allot on how long and how well you know each other. The feeling I get from your post is that this is a relatively new relationship, which can make things a bit more difficult for both of you. If you feel that he does truly care for you, he will probably be a bit hurt but I believe he will understand if you just tell him that something happened and you need a little time to work through it. You didn't do anything wrong by not answering his phone call, or missing the movie, and don't need to do anything to "make up" for it. Your parents are talking about separating and that can be one of the hardest things to try and deal with. And if / when you feel you are ready to tell him what is happening, and he can't understand that, then it will be something that he will need to work out for himself. I hope things work out ok with your family, and I hope I was able to help. even if only a little. MP
Magnatolia Posted November 4, 2007 Posted November 4, 2007 If he doesn't understand or gets angry then he isn't worth your time. I would suggest telling him that a serious family issue came up and it was distressing. Not telling him at all is pretty bad.
compassion42 Posted November 4, 2007 Posted November 4, 2007 It sounds like this guy is already your friend so he should completely understand your dilemma. Explain to him what happened in a way that is comfortable to you and of course apologize for missing the date. Suggest another day to get together and see what happens. What a horrible situation you are in-so sorry you are going through this with your family.
Tyra Posted November 4, 2007 Posted November 4, 2007 You didn't do anything wrong. Just call him and just explain to him the situation and set up another date to go out. If he is really into you, he shouldn't get upset, he should understand. If he doesn't, the hell with him. And this is definately nothing to get stress about. It's not even that serious.
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