shenandoah Posted November 2, 2007 Posted November 2, 2007 Hi, i've got myself in a right dating predicament, and i wondered if you guys could help me out here with what seems an impossible situation- how would you play it! I'm 26 and a mature student at my university. The other week i was sitting in my canteen, when i saw THE most gorgeous man. I was with this guy i'm seeing (not going too well atm, i think he's wrong for me, but well thats by the by, we're just seeing how it goes...) And i was so stunned i said out loud, oh my god, he's nice! He was about 5'10 dark haired in a suit with a briefcase. I thought to myself "not very often you get a gorgeous guy round here" he looked just my type too. Anyway i put it out of my mind. Meanwhile i'm having some trouble improving my marks, i keep trying but it was recommended that i go for a study consultation, and drop an email to the student centre to see if i could get some help reaching those high marks. they emailed me saying yeah, come on friday. So i turned up, carrying my rucksack and folder, and i was told to wait for the advisor. Then suddenly whilst i was waiting, this guy walks through the door. i peek over to look at him, and i think... " oh my god, he's beautiful....no... it isn't...? is it?" then he turns round and says "hi! are you here to speak with me? hello, i'm your advisor john.." And oh my god, it was him- the canteen guy! No suit, scruffy hair, sneakers and flannel shirt, but it was definitely him... At this stage i was excited obviously, but i didnt y'know envisage wedding bells or anything. That came after we talked.... he was polite, softly spoken, mild mannered, incredibly attentive, apologetic, intelligent, and despite the way i am with people i fancy, i felt utterly relaxed with him, i just liked him a lot, i liked the way he spoke, the way he moved, and my god.. i was glazing over looking at his eyes... we made another appointment for two weeks time, and i left. i was grinning like an idiot when i got out of there, i couldn't believe how gorgeous he was, that he'd turned up like that! Then i made the mistake of going home, and well...we've all googled somebody we fancy, haven't we? *blush* and i found his myspace and some other stuff... And oh my god... i am in love! he likes the same music as me, he's a performer, he does loads of union and community work, he's a tutor, writer, he's standing for council, does writers workshops, he's incredibly intelligent and cultured, funny, self deprecating, he's got a similar background to me, we have similar bugbears etc etc etc... If only he knew!! But he's also my advisor! I don't think that means he CANT go out with me- i'm a mature student and hes not my lecturer or anything! but i'm hardly going to walk into his office and proclaim i love him! And if i get him through myspace- well it looks a bit stalky, cos he'll know ive searched as we have no mutual 'friends'! But oh my god, i can't stop thinking about him. He's such an amazing man, and i'm very impressed by him, mainly because he doesnt come across like he does all that stuff, he comes across as very humble and softly spoken. By the time i get into that next appointment with him, i'm going to come accross like a giggly schoolgirl! Part of me wants to cancel the appointment because i don't want to continue this thing with him in a professional capacity, but if i do, it means that i wont get a chance to chat to him and stuff!!! God- i really am just gooey at the thought of him. I get the impression he's single but i don't know for 100%- defo not married. I showed his profile to my friend who said "he seems just the type for you- do something!" but what shall i do- and don't say "just ask him out!!" its more than i could EVER do to anybody!! i'm not that type of person! yikes!! Ideas??
jcster Posted November 2, 2007 Posted November 2, 2007 but what shall i do- and don't say "just ask him out!!" its more than i could EVER do to anybody!! i'm not that type of person! yikes!! Ideas?? I really think that you should ask him out. But, if that's something you can't do...then, you said he was a performer -attend one of his performances and be sure to speak to him afterward.
Author shenandoah Posted November 2, 2007 Author Posted November 2, 2007 Yeah, that's what i kind of thought of, but i hope it doesn't get to the point where i become so nervous and self conscious that i just look weird around him! Thing is, ive got no evidence that hes remotely interested in me- obviously the guy was at work, so everything i saw was him in a professional capacity. For his part, i have no clue if he fancies me- the only thing i got during that hour was that he was very polite, quick to get me another appointment- he initiated it and despite there being other people there to see, and despite us being unable to set an immediate date, he put me in for 2 weeks- with him- but again- he might just be doing his job. he was attentive, remembered what i said very well, but he might just be like that. body language wise, he was looking me in the eye a lot, but again- might be like that- and he was slightly stuttering over his words and messing with his hair loads, and i was too and noticed we were mirroring each other doing it, because i thought is it me, or him initiating it, i felt a bit embarrassed! The way he bid me goodbye was weird- it was either as though he didnt care at all or fancied me- i dont know how to explain it, he kind of murmered "yeah-k'gotta go, yeah, take care.." and turned around and got his next appointment. he was either glad to see the back of me, in a rush, or shy.
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