Jamian Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 Hi Wondewr if anyone can help. Mr Fiance broke up with me a fortnight ago, saying that she loves me but we are too different. Trouble is, after I asked her to stop contacting me so I can get over the split, she made it clear that she wants me to stay in contact with her son who gre attached to me over the 3 and a half years we were together. I just want to cut off contact completely so I can cope and move on. Her son said to me that he looked upon me like a Dad, but if I stay in contact, I will no doubt hear about any other guys she's seeing etc, that would break my heart. What should I do?
LucreziaBorgia Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 As hard as it is, it would be best to cut off all contact. As attached as he was, this boy is not your son and it is not fair of your ex to put you in a position of continued support as if you were. I can't imagine my ex still having contact with my daughter, and we were together for nearly three years and she has known him nearly her whole life. A split is a split though, and he wasn't her dad - he was just my boyfriend. When you are with a single mother, a kid is part of the package. When you break up, the kid is part of the breakup package too.
funkybassplayer Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 im in the same situation, and i feel that its not the kids fault that you guys split. Im gonna send b/day and xmas cards, but nothing more than that. I guess many kids suffer in break-up and marriage splits an often the abandontment comes out in later life. I guess even a small guesture like a card will be cool to them, and what harm can that be. They were our friends and b/c we have no romantic relationship with the mum, they were still our friends. I guess if your gonna hurt from it, then its not good, but maybe to remamber tham at a b/day may not be a bad thing. As ar as taking them camping/football.....a big no no !!
LucreziaBorgia Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 After reading FBP's answer, I'm inclined to agree. Cards, and gestures like that are thoughtful. I also agree that taking them out and spending time with them is a no-no.
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