Cad Rake Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 Hey, some of you may remember my question a couple months ago about how to beat the games of a girl who was playing hard to get -- a la the "Why Men Love Bitches" and "The Rules" books. I got a few helpful tips and thanx to those who helped me. So now in addition to the 3 women I have been dating, there's a new girl I just started dating. Screwed her on the 2nd date. Smoooooking hot petite little skinny body, just my type. Anyway this chick, like most of the other chicks I've ever known, is a complete nut. She's from my area, a recovering coke addict or some damn thing. Her family's all split up along the East Coast and she's a loony. But a freak in bed with a great bod, so I'm willing to put up with her crap for now. TURNS OUT that SHE is starting to play hard to get too! Uhhh. After only a month! Broke up with me for the first time today. I say for the first time because I've just come to the conclusion that getting dumped is just part of having a relationship with a girl.. that is to say, chicks break up with guys and then take them back all the time. It's weird for guys, because when a guy breaks up with a chick it's usually because he is DONE with her. So for guys, breaking up is usually FINAL. And most guys won't even do the breaking up. He will just call less and less until finally the chick breaks up with him. So when guys hear a chick break up with them it usually sounds pretty final and is rather upsetting. So I'm embarrassed to say that after 30 years I've only just realized that when a woman breaks up with a guy it's rarely final. It's more of a bargaining ploy or a statement. It's like the chick is saying, "I think YOU want to break up with ME so I'm going to do it first" or "You're not giving me the attention I need so I'm going to break up with you and see if you're interested enough to 'win' me back." And then of course the guy sends emails and flowers saying "no no no I really want you" and the chick takes him back. Or he doesn't, and they go their separate ways. This is a fairly new revelation to me. When chicks dumped me in the past I'd just feel bad, leave them alone, and after weeks or months get over them. And this, because I thought that they dumped for the same reason guys dump girls. God knows how many I coulda gotten back just by calling or seeming interested again! Oh well. So anyway, that's my (better late than never) epiphany. Currently dating 4 girls, been dumped by every single one of them at least once, some of the 2-3 year long girls have dumped me six or eight times. Funny *****, and I finally am coming to know how to avoid it ----- don't treat being dumped by a chick as final, just let her know you're still interested and it's back in the saddle! To qualify the above statement: Chicks usually dump ME because, well, I am dating several of them and because of that can't give them the attention they want. It's not generally because I come on too strong. It's because they can't have as much of me as they want. So if you get dumped because you come on too strong and are too clingy or whatever then the above may not apply to you.
Krytie TV Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 Hey, some of you may remember my question a couple months ago about how to beat the games of a girl who was playing hard to get -- a la the "Why Men Love Bitches" and "The Rules" books. I got a few helpful tips and thanx to those who helped me. So now in addition to the 3 women I have been dating, there's a new girl I just started dating. Screwed her on the 2nd date. Smoooooking hot petite little skinny body, just my type. Given the way you like to talk about banging smoking hot chicks I wonder... why would they want to dump you? I'm sure this personality couldn't possibly come out in your interactions with them? I have always found breakups to be very final. It's interesting that you are having that experience. I've never broken up with someone more than once.
Author Cad Rake Posted October 29, 2007 Author Posted October 29, 2007 Thanks for the quick response. Yes I suppose I treat them less than great.. however, I'm usually more gentlemanly toward them in the beginning. And especially to this girl. It's just in forums like this where I let my true feelings come out. I'm curious, how many men have you broken up with? And how old are you? Every woman who's dumped me in the past 5 years I've gotten back together with at least once. It may have taken a bouquet of flowers, or a loving email, or calling them several times, but I've managed to do it. Of course none of the women I'm dating right now know of the others I'm dating
Trialbyfire Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 I would be shocked if Krytie ever dumped any men before.
Krytie TV Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 I would be shocked if Krytie ever dumped any men before. I've broken a few of their hearts, but never dated any Cad, I'm a guy. I've been broken up with well, a lot. I guess there was one that wanted me back after dumping me, but it only lasted a week after that. I've broken up with at least 5 and have never been sought after to get back together.
Author Cad Rake Posted October 29, 2007 Author Posted October 29, 2007 Yeah um read my post again. I said that when men dump women, it's final. When women dump men, it's not usually so, unless the guy actually leaves.
Krytie TV Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 Right. And I'm saying only once out of many times that I've been dumped have they ever come back. That's why I find it interesting that you make this "always" assertion.
Author Cad Rake Posted October 29, 2007 Author Posted October 29, 2007 no dude, you're missing my point. The point is, YOU have to "come back" when you've been dumped. They dump you and wait for YOU to come back to THEM. If you fail to come back the right way then you will remain dumped.
bigheartkindsoul Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 Dating 4 girls - they constantly dump me! Ahhh bless
halfarock Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 My girlfriend and I have broken up and gotten back together three times, mostly because of her emotional problems. Once I stayed away for a whole year. She cried the whole time but she never called and asked me back. A woman who I was dating when I first got together with my girlfriend dumped me because she didn’t like the idea that I was always flirting with other women. A few months later I ran into her at a party and we both had dates with us. We snuck off to smooch for awhile. Later, at another party, another woman was coming on to me and she just happened to be there and threatened to kick the other woman’s a$$. Then she insisted that I leave with her and we got back together. She then broke up with me because I told her that I was falling in love with my girlfriend. I’ve run into her 3 or 4 times since. Every time she has asked me if I want to make out, each time I told her no and she came back with, “Why, you still have a bit@h?” All other girlfriends that I’ve had in the past ten years it’s been more like I just lost interest and stopped going to see them. Everyone, when I decided to go back, were happy to see me again.
love4ever Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 Hmm, I'm a firm believer in not repeating past mistakes. If I dump I guy I definitely wouldn't go back to him for a relationship.(maybe a booty call:p)...it seems stupid to me to try something again when you already knew it wasn't working out. Plus the whole dating four girls things? I mean really? Are you actually sleeping with each one? and do they know your doing that. I've dated more than one guy at the same time before but refrain from the sex part because it just doesn't seem sanitary to me. They probably dump you because they feel they're not getting all of you...believe me people can sense that. I'd try cutting down to two at least.
jcster Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 When I dump someone, it's forever. I don't believe in wasting my or my exe's time.
underpants Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 You reap what you sow dude. I know you feel like the big man and women just fall at your feet. At least that is how your posts read to me. If you have multiple shallow relationships with addicted or unstable women then you will reap the disadvantages of such relationships. Go ahead, prey on their insecurities and exploit their weakness. Feels great, huh? Is that what it takes to compensate for your own insecurities? You don't sound like the type of person capable of a real and deeply intimate connection with one person. For the record. Break ups are final in my book.
Star Gazer Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 Yeah um read my post again. I said that when men dump women, it's final. When women dump men, it's not usually so, unless the guy actually leaves. I've actually found the exact opposite to be true. I believe women analyze and emotionally remove themselves from the relationship before the 'real' end comes. For a woman, when it's over, it's O-V-E-R. Men, on the other hand, are much more impulsive and quick to react, making them more likely to regret their decision and try to get back together.
Trialbyfire Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 To quote Gunny, women invest during the relationship and men invest at the end of it...
jcster Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 You're not really dating these "chicks," you're boning them. Big difference - so don't draw too many conclusions about women in general from this. You may also find that they act a lot differently after they go through rehab.
Author Cad Rake Posted October 29, 2007 Author Posted October 29, 2007 Plus the whole dating four girls things? I mean really? Are you actually sleeping with each one? and do they know your doing that. I've dated more than one guy at the same time before but refrain from the sex part because it just doesn't seem sanitary to me. Well, whatever floats your boat. But yes of course I'm sleeping with all of them. I don't consider myself to be 'dating' a girl unless I'm having sex with her! They probably dump you because they feel they're not getting all of you...believe me people can sense that. I'd try cutting down to two at least. I did two for the last 3 years, and it does work. But even then you're absolutely right.. women can tell when they don't "own" you and women like to cut out all other women from having any part of you. That's why they keep dumping me!!
Author Cad Rake Posted October 29, 2007 Author Posted October 29, 2007 I know you feel like the big man and women just fall at your feet. At least that is how your posts read to me. Well I'm sorry you feel that way because that's definitely not the way I am. Actually I have to work VERY VERY HARD for pu**y. Women most certainly do not fall at my feet. And I certainly don't consider myself "big" because I'm short, scrawny, pale and losing my hair. Not exactly a catch, though my face is somewhat handsome. But I do have a very strategic mind and, if I may say so, pretty good "game" as well as supreme confidence. So obviously yes I am bragging somewhat about what I'm doing, but believe me it takes a LOT of work, patience and heartache. Pimpin' ain't easy. I am always looking for improvement and so I post here to get input from (very few) likeminded people and (a vast hoard) of people who disagree with me. 95% of what is posted in reply to my stuff is worthless chaff but every once in awhile there's a gem in there.
bigheartkindsoul Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 You're not really dating these "chicks," you're boning them. Big difference - so don't draw too many conclusions about women in general from this. You may also find that they act a lot differently after they go through rehab. How true and LMAO
Cobra_X30 Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 So obviously yes I am bragging somewhat about what I'm doing, but believe me it takes a LOT of work, patience and heartache. Pimpin' ain't easy. Cad, Your philosophy on women is aweful! Other guys are going to spend a lifetime lugging around baggage you create! And for what?
Author Cad Rake Posted October 29, 2007 Author Posted October 29, 2007 Yeah..that's what we call "chaff."
love4ever Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 So obviously yes I am bragging somewhat about what I'm doing, but believe me it takes a LOT of work, patience and heartache. Pimpin' ain't easy. I am always looking for improvement and so I post here to get input from (very few) likeminded people and (a vast hoard) of people who disagree with me. 95% of what is posted in reply to my stuff is worthless chaff but every once in awhile there's a gem in there. lmao @ pimp' ain't easy Yeah..that's what we call "chaff." Umm whats chaff?
Colossal Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 ...Currently dating 4 girls, been dumped by every single one of them at least once, some of the 2-3 year long girls have dumped me six or eight times. Dude you are a man-gina. Why are still dating girls who have repeatedly dumped you? Have some dignity. I think you are just banging whatever 'smoking hot' nutjobs you can juggle simultaneously because you get some sort of personal validation out of it.
squeak Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 I kinda have to agree with 'ol cadrake there, this post rings really true. Except in cases where: the chemistry died (then it was permenant break up) verbally/mentally abusive in any way (then it was permenant break up) But it's true, if a girl leaves because she is feeling she needs to dump because she feels she may be dumped, or isn't getting enough attention- chances are she will take you back if the behavior changes. I guess you keep getting dumped and taken back because you sweet talk them back but don't really make them feel special like they hoped would happen when taking you back. I can see that- admitting that they are being rejected to themselves is very hard (in the form of neglect within the relationship) and to dump you does not make that rejection of themselves by you initially any easier to take. So when you try to get back with them, that is the temporary salve they needed. But it will happen again if the results are not consistent. But you seem to already know this, so I'm not sure what else you were hoping for insight wise....
underpants Posted October 29, 2007 Posted October 29, 2007 Dude you are a man-gina. Why are still dating girls who have repeatedly dumped you? Have some dignity. I think you are just banging whatever 'smoking hot' nutjobs you can juggle simultaneously because you get some sort of personal validation out of it. I agree with this and I love the term 'man-gina'. I may use this in the future. I may even extrapolate further to say I have a manginaitis, or manginobia. Cad, While you are seperating the wheat from the chaff. You may serve yourself well to re examine which part of the pale you reside on. It is hard to feel anything but sorry for you. At some point you will have (if you are lucky) another ephinany regarding how your manipulations have served YOU. None of my words matter at all now. You seek only the 'gems' that can help you work hard at further manipulations and conquests. One day, as you swirl your drink and realize that you are indeed alone and/or very unhappy. Perhaps then, when you are the old man seated to a throne of pain you might have a glimpe at your pire of destruction. Happy dating.
Recommended Posts