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Friends with a separated man...possible?


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Posted

We are both in our late 20s; he's been separated a year and the divorce is pending. He's in love with his wife, admits that's lessening, though, and that he is in 'acceptance' phase. We became fast friends and are attracted to each other in a serious way (we've been intimate but agreed to step away). I realize he isn't ready to date and he won't act on the attraction because he doesn't want to "hurt either one of us". (though he once made a reference to waiting on our friendship and seeing if something real develops). My question: have any of you remained friends with a man going through this, a man you share a mutual connection with? What happened? How do you maintain your sanity? How do not give in the attraction and ruin the friendship?

Posted

Less than a year? And he still is inlove with her?

 

Honestly, if I were in your shoes, I'd wait till the divorce was final. If his wife changes her mind and asks him to come back, for a second chance at fixing things, what do you think will happen? Does he love you enough to say no to her, and proceed with the divorce? Or do you think he'd want another shot at the marriage.

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Posted

...well, that's why we're agreeing to be friends.

I do believe it takes a while to get over true love.

And, honestly, the friendship is so important to me because we click, for lack of a better term.

How, though, do we fight the mutual physical and mental attraction?

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