nadiaj2727 Posted October 27, 2007 Posted October 27, 2007 I'm at the end of Day 2 (woo hoo... big step ) of NC with my (EX!) MM, with whom I unfortunately work. He is waaaay senior than I am at work and I have to work with him on some big projects. Complete NC is impossible due to this. I made it a goal to only talk to him about work stuff at work, and even keep that as limited as possible. Luckily I recently was offered (and took... seeing as I was trying to break things off with him) an opportunity to work in a different field under a new "mentor" of sorts (I WILL NOT SLEEP WITH THIS ONE!!!! I SOLEMNLY SWEAR!!!), so there's hope, but I still have some projects under my ex-MM's supervision and he's still my official "mentor", so I have to deal with him in a lot of aspects I'd rather not. But he keeps using work as a way to try to talk to me and to drag personal stuff into it. Today he came into my office and told me he needs me to go DC with him on a case. This is ridiculous as the client would never want a newbie like me billing for something like this. I know it's a ploy to see me. He has had this appointment in DC scheduled for months and NEVER said he needed me or any other employee to go with him. In fact, he had asked me to come along with him (personally, not as part of the job) before NC and I'd said maybe, but then changed my mind as I kept trying to break it off, and told him no thanks. So now when he asked me to come as part of work, I asked him to please keep work contact for professional issues, and I also told him I very strongly feel that that asking me to go to DC with him is a personal ploy, not a professional decision. I was very proud of how I handled it... I was firm and stood my ground waaay better than I ever used to be able to do with him. He denied it was for personal reasons, but in trying to explain why it was necessary for me to go, he changed his story three times in a row about why he was asking ME to go instead of a more senior associate... or no one at all as was originally planned... and how exactly I would be assisting him there. And then he told me that other new associates would be "salivating" for an opportunity like this and that I'd better start getting used to going to these things with him despite our situation, because there are a lot more he will be having me go to both on my own and with him. I think I may have to start looking for a new job! I love this job but I guess I shouldn't have F-ed it up by getting involved with him. I have NO idea how to ignore him when he purposefully makes personal things professional. Does anyone else have this problem? Any advice??? I am really depressed when I think of trying to wait out his divorce sanely and maintain my distance, while he keeps finding reasons to make personal issues into work issues.
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