Yosef Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 I'm VERY confused and unsure of myself. It's not something I dwell on 24/7, but I look back to the subject every time I think about dating. I'm 17, by the way. I like being single, the peace is great, I have nobody to give attention to, nobody to breathe down my neck, and none of the arguments and stress involved in creating a balance between the two of us. If I don't return a call, or if I just don't call, for ONE NIGHT, I don't get strangled. I lose all of my energy just talking to someone for an hour, when I can go biking for five hours and still have enough energy to walk another mile or two. Unfortunately, I like this girl at my church, and she obviously likes me back. She has mentioned, out loud, to multiple people including myself, why she likes me. She says, "The way I sing and the way I care" and "I just make her feel good inside." This was OUT LOUD, which surprised me, but made me, in turn, feel all warm and fuzzy inside. She's very dependent and very sensitive. I'm sensitive as well. I care for her very much and vice-versa. My mom and her mom are very good friends and they often coverse about me and her, and my mom tells me how much she adores my presence. My big "Taking the Chance" was asking her to homecoming, and she was extremely excited. It went well. Now, it seems like I've hit the jackpot, right? I love to make her feel good, I love to provide for her and to be there for her, and I love to see her happy. The last thing I want to do is hurt her, and I'm afraid I'm hurting her [btw, im the biggest worry wort,] because I don't want to go out with her, but if we do go out, I don't want to break the news and say "I can't date you anymore because I don't like the constant attention and prefer to be independent, but we can still be best friends" and all that. Her mom (currently divorced and the household leader) is practically begging for me to ask her out, without being so upfront. She says stuff like "Why don't you go with Olivia to the gas station to pick up a drink that isn't soda, because she's off soda." Why would I need to go with her if she has money and a car and is only getting ONE drink? Then she said earlier, "You need to take more pictures of Olivia." Well, she's in like EVERY picture that the youth group takes. Her mom obviously wants us together. All in all, what do I do? Go out with her or keep my independence? I always try to make her feel better, by dedicating songs to her or something, but I'm very doubtful of my ability to retain such a relationship.
Darkzen Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 Be honest, if she can't accept who you are... you guys aren't meant to be in a relationship TBH.
Lunar Sonata Posted November 1, 2007 Posted November 1, 2007 The great thing about these situations happening in high school is graduation. The situation usually solves itself for the better or worse! Just ride it out. You're allowed to break her heart. You're both at the prime age for that because it's not as heavy as breaking someone elses heart who didn't have a mother to coax a date. Wait until breaking someone's heart in a world where both parties have to pretty much fend for themselves and where free time for dating is much more precious. In a way, you'll be doing this girl a favor. Break her heart early and she'll be stronger from it, somehow. Maybe.
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