Rodsoxfan82 Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 I have a really good friend that I have known for years. She would do anything for me as I would do anything for her and her daughter. But lately she has been nonstop calling me to whine and bitch about stupid stuff and using up all my cell phone min. I mean I wanna be there for her but she throws a fit if I don't answer or call her right back. How do I nicely tell her to back off a little so I can have a life? I don't wanna upset her or lose her as a friend, but I need some personal time too....Any advice?
Yosef Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 I have a really good friend that I have known for years. She would do anything for me as I would do anything for her and her daughter. But lately she has been nonstop calling me to whine and bitch about stupid stuff and using up all my cell phone min. I mean I wanna be there for her but she throws a fit if I don't answer or call her right back. How do I nicely tell her to back off a little so I can have a life? I don't wanna upset her or lose her as a friend, but I need some personal time too....Any advice? You need to tell her IN PERSON, NOT OVER THE PHONE, that she needs to relax. Tell her that she needs to find some form of non-violent stress relief. Oh, you know what, tell her to write her complaints in a journal. Buy her a journal for her complaints, and tell her to read over them. Writing down your problems is a big stress reliever and lets you sound off on what bothers you without hurting anyone or anything. If she reads over her problems, she may find answers. When you trap your sorrows in your mind, you have no mental capacity to think of a solution, but if you write your problem down, read over it a couple of times, you're likely to find an answer. Also, tell her that when you get home, if she is still bothered by just a couple of things, that you can go over it with her and come up with a solution. Don't just let her complain about everything that she can't find a solution for. She needs to rank what is bothering her most, or categorize them. Some solutions can solve other problems as well, hitting two or more birds with one stone. After every journal entry, she should write down the solution to her complaint, or comment on a complaint that she can look back when she's troubled and find a solution from the past that worked before.
Author Rodsoxfan82 Posted October 27, 2007 Author Posted October 27, 2007 Thats a really good idea. Thank you! I might just try that next time I see her.
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