Steffie575 Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 I cant stop picturing my ex with his new girlfriend. Not in the present tense....with like, future things. it sounds ridiculous but I keep on torturing myself picturing them doing the things he promised me we'd do together....god. I cant listen to ANY music.....everything reminds me of him.
JosieMcCoy Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 OMG! That sucks!!! Keep on trucking sister! Cheers!
mourningMM Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Rent a movie that he would hate. Go to a spa and get a massage. Do all of the things that you thought you would do together with someone who appreciates them MORE than he ever could....or do them with lots of people. Pick one of the most precious "future memories" and make it yours. The place you always wanted to go together? Calll a sister or a friend, book the travel and go. Then send him a picture of you doing what he always talked about! And remember that no matter how good you imagine he might be feeling, if he is part of the relationship all of his problems and issues go into it.
Author Steffie575 Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 Rent a movie that he would hate. Go to a spa and get a massage. Do all of the things that you thought you would do together with someone who appreciates them MORE than he ever could....or do them with lots of people. Pick one of the most precious "future memories" and make it yours. The place you always wanted to go together? Calll a sister or a friend, book the travel and go. Then send him a picture of you doing what he always talked about! And remember that no matter how good you imagine he might be feeling, if he is part of the relationship all of his problems and issues go into it. Thats what Ive been trying to do....do stuff that has absolutely nothing to do with him. A few weekends ago though, I went somewhere with some friends that he and I shared some great moments at....it was miserable...heartbreaking. I just want to know if he still cares....even if he has someone else? God...how can he just move on so fast...
InkSlinger Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Thats what Ive been trying to do....do stuff that has absolutely nothing to do with him. A few weekends ago though, I went somewhere with some friends that he and I shared some great moments at....it was miserable...heartbreaking. I just want to know if he still cares....even if he has someone else? God...how can he just move on so fast... I am sorry to hear you're going through this Steffie, you've gotten some great advice/ideas from everyone, I know its so hard when those thoughts come at you, but the reasons for moving on so fast, are so varied and different for everyone that it is impossible [or almost] to figure out, unfortunately. It helps though, as others have said, to distract yourself when those thoughts and images come around. I don't know the particulars of your breakup, how long since etc, but I've found that it has helped when those thoughts/images come crashing in, to take a moment, acknowledge them for what they are, then keep them at bay with thoughts of future happiness; of the new places and people you will meet in the days to come and the memories you will make that will replace those you long for and miss so much. It doesn't always work, but sometimes it does and each time it gets a little bit easier. Do not fight those thoughts, just don't dwell on them, as it gives them the power so to speak, keep yourself focused on your future and use the ideas other's have offered and soon, it will be easier. Much luck and I hope it gets easier for you, very soon. Ink
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