Hulme Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Ex gave me the "love you but not IN love with you" speech 2 weeks ago. Today, a friend directs me to a blog (that I didn't know he had) where he's lamenting about how his ex was the best sex he ever had and he doubts he'll ever have it that good again. I want him back, but I'm not gonna go just for sex. Tell me though, do you all think this is an angle I can work with?
JosieMcCoy Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Sure! You can do it!!! You are the best sex!!! But are you not the best at?? Cheers!
Trialbyfire Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Absolutely, you can work with it but do you want to? In knowing that he misses the "best sex", won't this always make you wonder if that's all he's back for? Think about it. Isn't it better to let go and then be ready for someone who wants you for all of you?
johan Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Can you please explain what made the sex so good?
Author Hulme Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 I get what you're saying. It's just this guy is a real "guy" if you know what I mean. Not good at articulating his feelings. Although he was writing about sex, it also sounded like he was really sad, not just horny. Kind of makes me think he's missing more than the sex. If I go there, I'm sticking a toe in the water, not diving in.
Author Hulme Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 Can you please explain what made the sex so good? Honestly, more about our personal chemistry---not about tricks or acrobatics (though I do like those).
Trialbyfire Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 I get what you're saying. It's just this guy is a real "guy" if you know what I mean. Not good at articulating his feelings. Although he was writing about sex, it also sounded like he was really sad, not just horny. Kind of makes me think he's missing more than the sex. If I go there, I'm sticking a toe in the water, not diving in. See, here's where I have no mercy. If a guy isn't capable or willing to articulate his feelings, it doesn't get them an exemption. Think further down the road when there are even more serious issues to address and he's unable/unwilling to articulate his feelings. How will issues ever get resolved?
Author Hulme Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 See, here's where I have no mercy. If a guy isn't capable or willing to articulate his feelings, it doesn't get them an exemption. Think further down the road when there are even more serious issues to address and he's unable/unwilling to articulate his feelings. How will issues ever get resolved? I understand. Thing is, he WAS coming along--still rough for him to do it, but better than when we started dating. And our emotional and mental chemistry was as good as our physical chemistry. Which is the reason I might be willing to give him a (tentative) second chance. Just wondering what any guys here think--if you put it out there for the world that a girl was "the best" you've ever had, is there a chance you're regretting losing more than just the sex?
Trialbyfire Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 I understand. Thing is, he WAS coming along--still rough for him to do it, but better than when we started dating. And our emotional and mental chemistry was as good as our physical chemistry. Which is the reason I might be willing to give him a (tentative) second chance. Just wondering what any guys here think--if you put it out there for the world that a girl was "the best" you've ever had, is there a chance you're regretting losing more than just the sex? Okay, one more thought for you. Here's the most significant crossroad you've ever had between the two of you. He's willing to walk away.
Darkzen Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 That "love you, but not in love with you" thing, is such a crock of sh*t. So he's not infatuated with you anymore, that doesn't last forever anyways... when someone says that, I think they're really trying to say "I'm bored with you and think the grass is greener over there". The problem is that boredom is in the cards with all relationships... it means that you know that person as well as possible and the shiny newness has faded. I'd say, don't bother wasting your time... this guy will probably never be content with anyone. It takes a major event in someone's life to figure it out, he doesn't seem to have gotten there yet.
cj1988 Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 I agree, that I am no IN LOVE is BS. Love is not a feeling it is how you treat someone. You can be in love with your family, kids and significant other. It all means the same thing, when you are IN LOVE with a human that never fades, you care for them and take care of them in a sense. But the infatuation does die and that is when you are bored and want something else.
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