Timberlane Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Hey, don't get too stressed out. If you think it will be OK, it will be. I know how you feel, though. After a few dozen dates back when I was doing the online thing, it got me nervous showing up at the later ones. Dating fatigue is what I would call it. But it's been a while for you, so maybe you are ready for something. I know, have some soothing music ready to play in the car. Seriously. In any case, have fun.
Author uniqueone Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 I'm so copy/pasting this to every email I send from this point on. Hey, I would. He got me to write him back. (and his ad even said he had a young child too!) (*ahem*....of course this is all contingent, however on how young is "young")
Author uniqueone Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 Hey, don't get too stressed out. If you think it will be OK, it will be. I know how you feel, though. After a few dozen dates back when I was doing the online thing, it got me nervous showing up at the later ones. Dating fatigue is what I would call it. But it's been a while for you, so maybe you are ready for something. I know, have some soothing music ready to play in the car. Seriously. In any case, have fun. Oh I'll have fun. I usually do no matter what they turn out to be. The problem is whether or not I ever hear from them again. I hate that part--whether I liked them or not!
JosieMcCoy Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Oh unique one , you have fun!!! Don't over hype it in your head!! Bye! Cheers!
Timberlane Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Oh I'll have fun. I usually do no matter what they turn out to be. The problem is whether or not I ever hear from them again. I hate that part--whether I liked them or not! Yes, that is always the worst part. Well, for me, if the woman was not warm to me when I said goodnight and did not give me a nice smile and mention seeing me again soon, I would not call them the next day.
Sean0775 Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 Hey, I would. He got me to write him back. (and his ad even said he had a young child too!) (*ahem*....of course this is all contingent, however on how young is "young") I just sent it in about 3 emails, so we'll see if anyone responds. It's pretty rare I read something I wish I'd thought of, but that was damn smooth.
Author uniqueone Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 Yes, that is always the worst part. Well, for me, if the woman was not warm to me when I said goodnight and did not give me a nice smile and mention seeing me again soon, I would not call them the next day. I never mention seeing them again soon. I see if THEY mention it. I give them a smile though.
Author uniqueone Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 I just sent it in about 3 emails, so we'll see if anyone responds. It's pretty rare I read something I wish I'd thought of, but that was damn smooth. Wasn't it though? And leave to me to like the smooth talkers too......
lino Posted October 25, 2007 Posted October 25, 2007 (UGH...why did I say Saturday? Or even Friday for that matter? I think I just made myself look like a loser who has no weekend plans). I hate this whole stupid image thing....you know....how I'm supposed to make them think I have this busy calendar and all..... I DO have a busy calendar, but it doesnt' involve other people so it's pretty flexible and doesn't involve commitments for weekends...which is why I'm available. If you hate the whole image thing then why are you worried? Having a friday or saturday free doesn't mean you don't have a life or that you're a loser.
Author uniqueone Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 If you hate the whole image thing then why are you worried? Having a friday or saturday free doesn't mean you don't have a life or that you're a loser. I hate the image thing but you sort of have to play along. It's kind of like the work world. I hate office politics but that doesn't mean I can be totally free of it. I will admit to appearing busy when I haven't been. I won't lie to them. I'll just be elusive. I'll also admit to being more attracted to those who aren't sitting at home on the weekends. I figure they might be less boring than me and it might be contagious.
Author uniqueone Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 I think I might cancel the date.
Star Gazer Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 Just got this...... Now THIS is the kind of message I LIKE to get from a guy: Please keep in mind the impossibilty of writing an introductory email to a person you've never met. And, the inevitability of anything I write sounding trite. You know it was really inconsiderate of you not to email me first and save me from this humiliating task. After all the time we've known each other, I think it was the least you could have done. Anyway, I'm through with us, this was the last straw. Sincerely, X P.S. You look and sound like a very smart, beautiful, sarcastic, genuine person, and I would love to correspond or talk. Take care and have a great day. Are you in SoCal? I received a nearly identical email from a dude when I lived in SoCal...and he sent the same exact email to two of my girlfriends.
Star Gazer Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 [Re: Kamille's question why you're not ready] Some things I've posted about....some things I haven't. We can't help you figure this out without having a complete picture. If it's true that you're not ready to meet people, then why are you visible on a dating site?
Kamille Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 I think I might cancel the date. Oh no! I rolled my eyes again! Go on the date. It's just a date, nothing more nothing less.
Jack Africa Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 ....you know....how I'm supposed to make them think I have this busy calendar and all..... Who gives you women this kind of advice ? It is TERRIBLE advice. Desirable men who have options will not chase after a woman who has a " busy calendah " . Trying to date a busy woman is annoying and off- putting . It does NOT make you more desireable , it males you a PROBLEM. You need to be AVAILABLE if you want to date a good man. .
Author uniqueone Posted October 26, 2007 Author Posted October 26, 2007 Are you in SoCal? I received a nearly identical email from a dude when I lived in SoCal...and he sent the same exact email to two of my girlfriends. Nope....not in SoCal. Don't worry...I'm not naive enough to think he only sent it to me...
Author uniqueone Posted October 26, 2007 Author Posted October 26, 2007 We can't help you figure this out without having a complete picture. If it's true that you're not ready to meet people, then why are you visible on a dating site? Some recent things made things more difficult for me and those things occurred months after I signed up....so how was I to know? Aside from that, I first put an ad out there to meet people but then went through periods where I didn't want to meet anyone or I didn't find interest in anyone who was contacting me (with good reason).
Author uniqueone Posted October 26, 2007 Author Posted October 26, 2007 Oh no! I rolled my eyes again! Go on the date. It's just a date, nothing more nothing less. Well here's the thing......in the past, the guys I really clicked with were obvious.....we clicked in emails fantastically....we clicked on the phone fantastically.... There was NO DOUBT that we'd have a great connection together when we met (and we did). With him.....sporadic email....sporadic phone call. Neither consist of much. I don't feel a connection. I like to feel a connection BEFORE I meet the person. Is that so bad?
Author uniqueone Posted October 26, 2007 Author Posted October 26, 2007 Who gives you women this kind of advice ? It is TERRIBLE advice. Desirable men who have options will not chase after a woman who has a " busy calendah " . Trying to date a busy woman is annoying and off- putting . It does NOT make you more desireable , it males you a PROBLEM. You need to be AVAILABLE if you want to date a good man. . Nope, I disagree. A guy doesn't want a woman who, when he asks her (on a Sunday) what she did last night, says: "Nuthin". (and a woman doesn't want a guy like that either) And btw, I wasn't saying that the woman should appear TOO busy to fit him in.
Star Gazer Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 Nope, I disagree. A guy doesn't want a woman who, when he asks her (on a Sunday) what she did last night, says: "Nuthin". (and a woman doesn't want a guy like that either) And btw, I wasn't saying that the woman should appear TOO busy to fit him in. I think there's a balance to be struck here. I don't think a guy should have to be "fit in" to a busy schedule. He should feel like somewhat of a priority.
Replicant Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 I think there's a balance to be struck here. I don't think a guy should have to be "fit in" to a busy schedule. He should feel like somewhat of a priority. Exactly! Uniqueone: If you are actually busy with work or activities in your own life then yeah sure by all means it's interesting conversation because it is true. But never to the point one is self absorbed in their own life and have little time to date. Let alone it does seem like you feel this is part of a game in which you think provides better chase and or curiosity? Why put up such a front and be exposed as a fraud? Providing you say you want intelligent men, i think most would see through that kind of crap. Doesn't make sense to me. As for internet dating, i think it pools people together who make themselves available to date because they want to and there for a purpose, greater odds in that sense than a random encounter. But like i said before apathetic in regards to that 'first meeting' someone physically. Looking at this...you seem to be shooting them all down before giving them a chance (meaning dates) but complaining about it profusely. If you don't vote you cant bitch about who's elected. You also mention meeting some guys blading, so!? What's the problem? More candidates.
Star Gazer Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 Looking at this...you seem to be shooting them all down before giving them a chance (meaning dates) but complaining about it profusely. If you don't vote you cant bitch about who's elected. You also mention meeting some guys blading, so!? What's the problem? More candidates. "Exactly!!!!"
Author uniqueone Posted October 26, 2007 Author Posted October 26, 2007 Exactly! Uniqueone: If you are actually busy with work or activities in your own life then yeah sure by all means it's interesting conversation because it is true. But never to the point one is self absorbed in their own life and have little time to date. Let alone it does seem like you feel this is part of a game in which you think provides better chase and or curiosity? Why put up such a front and be exposed as a fraud? Providing you say you want intelligent men, i think most would see through that kind of crap. Doesn't make sense to me. I guess I didn't convey it correctly. I certainly don't act too busy and I certainly don't propose that people should act that way. But I don't think that people should appear that they are lazing around with nothing to do either. You seem to have taken my comment to the far, far extreme. As for internet dating, i think it pools people together who make themselves available to date because they want to and there for a purpose, greater odds in that sense than a random encounter. But like i said before apathetic in regards to that 'first meeting' someone physically. Looking at this...you seem to be shooting them all down before giving them a chance (meaning dates) but complaining about it profusely. If you don't vote you cant bitch about who's elected. No...I give the ones a chance I'm interested in. You're saying I should give the ones I chance I'm not attracted to or who can't speak correctly? I suppose there are some people who would just go out with "anyone" but not me. If you call that picky, well then yes I am. And I'd rather be picky than not. And I'd rather be alone than with someone I'm not that attracted to or interested in. Some people aren't like that though. Some people are too interested in just having "someone" You also mention meeting some guys blading, so!? What's the problem? More candidates. I don't get your point here. Regardless, blading season is over and also the guys I'm interested in aren't forward enough and the guys that I'm NOT interested in ARE forward.
Jack Africa Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 I think there's a balance to be struck here. I don't think a guy should have to be "fit in" to a busy schedule. He should feel like somewhat of a priority. THis is the way to think, ladies ! You want a good man ? Then make room for one. Good men have options( that means other women to date) we do not have to 'fit in" to a women's life or alter OUR life to suit YOUR schedule. If you are "busy" we will just dail another candidate..
Author uniqueone Posted October 26, 2007 Author Posted October 26, 2007 If you are "busy" we will just dail another candidate.. That's funny....they always chase me MORE then.
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