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Posted
its a very complicated thing..........trust me. I know i have a problem but im not getting any intimacy and so therefore i find myself wanting other people

 

Hmmm.... You are not coming across well.

 

So do you want to know how to get this kids attention... or how to keep the affair a secret?

Posted

Then what is your question? How do you go about what? Hooking up, where to go, what to do, what?

Posted
hubby knows how i feel about it. but obviously doesnt seem to care. I cant get divorced i dont believe in it

 

OK you don't believe in divorce, but you believe in messin with the body and mind of a 16 year old? :confused:

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Posted

I want to know how to get his attention but also make it clear that it is to be a secret!!

 

He is very mature for his age...........not like most 16 years olds. I personally cant see it happening because I am not sure he could keep it a secret so.........I dont know.

 

I guess what I want to know is how do I go about finding out if he is indeed interested?

Posted

Ask him...

Posted

I hope that if his mother finds out, she doesn't come after you.

 

He needs to be with girls his own age and enjoying his youth, and hanging out with his friends not playing hide n seek with a married woman.

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Posted

the scary thing is i am friends with his mom and dad. I know that is weird. But everytime i am around him.........i cant help myself. I want him.........

Posted
I want to know how to get his attention but also make it clear that it is to be a secret!!

 

He is very mature for his age...........not like most 16 years olds. I personally cant see it happening because I am not sure he could keep it a secret so.........I dont know.

 

I guess what I want to know is how do I go about finding out if he is indeed interested?

 

Yeah, he would fall in love and squeal on you.

 

Well, he is 16 so for sure you can rule out asking him direct.

Posted

But everytime i am around him.........i cant help myself. I want him.........

 

I'm sorry, that's sad you feel you can't control yourself around him. If not around him, probably not around others if someone else were to catch your eye.

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Posted

I control myself around him........I just have thoughts. I had a dream about him last night. Was pretty amazing.........

Posted
the scary thing is i am friends with his mom and dad. I know that is weird. But everytime i am around him.........i cant help myself. I want him.........

 

I think what you need is therapy. This is just wrong on so many levels. You want to cheat on your husband, ok whatever. But ****ing with the 16 year old son of your friends is ridiculously messed up. Leave the poor kid alone and if you're going to have beliefs about holy matrimony and not getting divorced, then hold the entire ceremony dear. Til death do you part and only for each other. You can't pick and choose which to abide by and which not without being fake and aweful. If you do anything with this kid I hope the mother finds out and I hope she royally beats the crap out of you.

Posted

It's pretty sick. He's just a kid.

Posted
I control myself around him........I just have thoughts. I had a dream about him last night. Was pretty amazing.........

 

You could always drop off in his bookbag, the movie "The Graduate" with Dustin Hoffman.

Posted
I control myself around him........I just have thoughts. I had a dream about him last night. Was pretty amazing.........

 

I was kind of confused when you said you dont believe in divorce, but you believe adultery is ok.

 

Is that the situation?

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Posted

i dont know what i believe anymore.........just forget it

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Posted

i guess i shouldnt have written it

Posted
i dont know what i believe anymore.........just forget it

 

Can you at least explain why you wont discuss how you feel with your husband? What about marriage counseling for you both, is that an option? Do you really want to work on things with your husband?

Posted
i dont know what i believe anymore.........just forget it

 

Hunny,

 

See, everyone here cares about you and wants to help! But your wanting to take painkillers and ignore the cancer!

 

What everyone is saying is that we need to treat the disease, not the symptoms.

 

I think we all want the best for you. But there are so many here who have been touched by infidelity, they know how that story ends!

 

If your truely set on your path... I'm not sure I can help you with this. Maybe if you lie to me and say your single, and he is 18!

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Posted

I have discussed things with hubby. I do love him but there isnt any sex in the realationship so i find myself wanting it.........which is normal right?

 

So that is why I find myself lookin

Posted
I have discussed things with hubby. I do love him but there isnt any sex in the realationship so i find myself wanting it.........which is normal right?

 

So that is why I find myself lookin

 

You have discussed this with your husband. He knows how you feel and he doesn't really care... then I say he's probably doing the same thing while travelling... so I say: GO FOR IT!!!!!

 

The only thing is that guy is quite young and I very much doubt he can keep this big secret for himself... He would probably fall in love with you... and who knows where that can lead. Imagine if the parents find out..

There is a huge difference in age... only 12 years.. . you are quite young yourself. :)

 

So I say... why not go for someone else... another married guy maybe or someone you can totally trust.

 

Good luck! ;)

Posted

Yeah, it's definately normal. I was in a 5 year relationship where there was no sex for a while at the end. So I realized that sex is only the most important thing in a relationship if its missing. you need to be taken care of, but a 16 year old can't do that for you. You'll mess him up and make a much bigger mess than if you picked someone your own age. Not that I condone cheating, but if you're going to do it, don't make it more of a mess than it needs to be.

Posted

At least dont do it with 16 year old come on now your really asking for trouble let alone his your friends kid. You need help! seriously. Of course the kid is thinking that, at the age of 16 most kids want to stick in any hole. I guess different strokes for different folks:o. No dont do it! its a regert your gonna hold for the rest of your life. Dont even think his gonna keep it a secret thats very naive for you to think that.

Posted
I have discussed things with hubby. I do love him but there isnt any sex in the realationship so i find myself wanting it.........which is normal right?

 

So that is why I find myself lookin

 

I do think its normal to want intimacy, especailly when you're not getting those needs met, I think its human nature. However that doesn't mean you go out and get involved with someone else, because once the fun and games ends with that person(and it will) your problems with your husband will still be there. Has your husband told you himself WHY there is no sex in your relationship? You said he travels alot, what about the times he is home?

 

You said you don't believe in divorce, so that limits your options I would assume. Do you really want to live in an unhappy marriage, just because you do not believe in divorce? If you husband is not willing to meet you half way and help work on things with you, then it might be best to free yourself from the misery you feel you're in.

 

Going out and getting involved with someone else, no matter what age, is not the answer. If anything, it will only complicate things further for you.

 

I'm sure you want/deserve to be happy. Its all in what you want to do.

Posted

If you and your husband are ok with it, then I guess it's ok. But please go find an adult. Leave this kid alone.

Posted

Absolutely, we are here to help you, but we've gotta think of this kid too.

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