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Friend flirting with my date


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Posted

Is it possible to be completely unaware that you are flirting? I was at a party with the guy I am currently dating and one of my closest friends was there.

 

This friend loves flirting. She even thought me how to flirt: lean in, laugh, touch his knee, etc.

 

I usually do it intentionnally, meaning, if I pull any or all of those moves it's because I am interested in the guy I am speaking with.

 

Throughout the evening, I caught her twice pulling the lean in, laugh, touch the knee on my date. It bothered me but fortunately he wasn't reacting to it at all so I wasn't too worried.

 

Anyways, yesterday I ran into her and she told me: you know, your boyfriend is really quite the flirt.

 

I just didn't know what to say! I mean, I was there, I saw their interaction and my assessment is that she was the one really putting on the moves. I think it is somewhat unfair that she would make that comment and be completely oblivious to her own behavior.

 

Is she just trying to mask the fact that she is attracted to him by blaming him for her flirty attitude, or should I take her comment into consideration? Should I say anything?

Posted

Some friend.

 

She taught you the moves she was obviously using. Maybe she does it so much she doesn't even realize it. Don't let her pin that on the guy if she was the one makin' the moves. Where's the video camera when ya need it :p

Posted

I would have called her on it, as at the point where she mentioned your date was a flirt. This way, if she wasn't aware of it, she would be aware for any future interactions.

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Posted

I should have called her on it. The inconsistency of her comments - her saying that he was flirting - bugs me. But she does recognize that she is a flirt so maybe she was just pointing it out.

 

No matter what - she did cross a line for me. I had seen her flirt like this with men before, I just thought that she somehow wouldn't engage my date the same way. Ah well, I guess she just doesn't discriminate amongst men.

Posted

Why not broach the conversation with her again? You're a tactful person Kamille so I know you can do it gently. It's no use holding onto resentment between friends.

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