daterhater Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 my boyfriend and i have been dating for 2 and a half years. we don't live together and see eachother two to three times a week. when i wake up and get in my car to drive to work, i get the urge to call him and tell him goodmorning. sometimes i fight that urge when i remember how tired and annoyed he sounds by me calling at 8:15am. when my lunch break hits, i grab my phone and dial his number. it's like instinct to call him right away. after work, i reach for the phone as well. i can dfinitely tell he's getting annoyed by me. i think i call enough where he sounds annoyed. he's quick to get off the phone and never really seems that happy. this makes me really sad because i want to be with a guy who is as happy to hear from me as i am him. i want to have that relationship where you can't get enough of the other person. i think it's ridiculous that after 2.5 years with him i am only NOW starting to w orry about calling him too much. i don't think i should have to resist the urge to call him. if it makes me happy to be in a relatoinship where i can call the dude three times a day, i should get that. right? sorry i'm blabbing.
amaysngrace Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 I think you're giving off that "needy-clingy" vibe that guys hate. You know what I say? I say you should not call him at all tomorrow. And when he finally calls you to see what's up you can tell him how you thought you were annoying him by calling so much. This way you can talk about it with him and hopefully both gain more understanding into each other.
johan Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 He might be happy to hear from you, but doesn't like talking on the phone. It doesn't matter who is calling me, if I'm not in the mood to talk on the phone, I'm going to sound annoyed and in a rush to hang up. But I might still be glad someone is thinking of me. What a jerk I am.
amaysngrace Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 What a jerk I am. Yeah that's kind of jerky. You should at least sound happy even if you can't talk at the time.
Star Gazer Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 We're a new relationship, so I'm not sure if we should be talking more or less than a long-term relationship, but if we're not seeing each other that day, we usually talk mid-afternoon for about 10 minutes, and about 30 minutes that evening. In addition, we exchange emails in the morning.
Pyro Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 my boyfriend and i have been dating for 2 and a half years. we don't live together and see eachother two to three times a week. when i wake up and get in my car to drive to work, i get the urge to call him and tell him goodmorning. sometimes i fight that urge when i remember how tired and annoyed he sounds by me calling at 8:15am. when my lunch break hits, i grab my phone and dial his number. it's like instinct to call him right away. after work, i reach for the phone as well. i can dfinitely tell he's getting annoyed by me. i think i call enough where he sounds annoyed. he's quick to get off the phone and never really seems that happy. this makes me really sad because i want to be with a guy who is as happy to hear from me as i am him. i want to have that relationship where you can't get enough of the other person. i think it's ridiculous that after 2.5 years with him i am only NOW starting to w orry about calling him too much. i don't think i should have to resist the urge to call him. if it makes me happy to be in a relatoinship where i can call the dude three times a day, i should get that. right? sorry i'm blabbing. You definitely need to back off some, but at the same time he needs to talk to you about this instead of just sounding annoyed and wanting to get off the phone as quickly as he can. To me thats an immature way to go about things. My Gf and I do spend quite a bit of time together. The same goes for phone calls. We do talk every morning when I am on my way to work, but we usually keep the calls short. I do enjoy my time with her, but there are the occasional times when we do need a break from each other and we make sure that it happens before we annoy the heck out of each other.
sunshinegirl Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 My BF and I are not really phone people so our calls are few and far between, and usually pretty short (10 mins or so). We both travel a lot, so we rely a bit more on email when we're apart... but even then sometimes we're not in touch for a day or two at a time. That feels okay to me because we're both pretty independent (though sometimes when I'm overseas I'd like more contact from him). But when we are both home we spend almost every evening/weekend together. Oh and we've been together for about 8 months now.
popey Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 my bf and I have been together a little over a year. we don't live together, and we tend to spend most of the weekend together. during the week totally varies due to our jobs. But I'd say 1 or 2 is the average. We definitely "talk" a few times a day, but mostly email and text. That's just more suitable to both of us. maybe that would work better for you guys. gives you the chance to express that your thinking of him, and hear back; yet him the repreive from having talk when he's tired, or busy.
MistressOfTony Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 Don't call him when you have the urge, call your mother or best friend instead... or one of those 1-800 nums.
eroei Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 my boyfriend and i have been dating for 2 and a half years. we don't live together and see eachother two to three times a week. when i wake up and get in my car to drive to work, i get the urge to call him and tell him goodmorning. sometimes i fight that urge when i remember how tired and annoyed he sounds by me calling at 8:15am. when my lunch break hits, i grab my phone and dial his number. it's like instinct to call him right away. after work, i reach for the phone as well. i can dfinitely tell he's getting annoyed by me. i think i call enough where he sounds annoyed. he's quick to get off the phone and never really seems that happy. this makes me really sad because i want to be with a guy who is as happy to hear from me as i am him. i want to have that relationship where you can't get enough of the other person. i think it's ridiculous that after 2.5 years with him i am only NOW starting to w orry about calling him too much. i don't think i should have to resist the urge to call him. if it makes me happy to be in a relatoinship where i can call the dude three times a day, i should get that. right? sorry i'm blabbing. wow, so why don't you relocated?
allina Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 Are there any other problems in the relationship? Seeing a bf only 2-3 times a week after 2 and a half years seems a little rare. Would you like to see him more? Does it seem like he's not in to the relationship as much as you are? After dating for so long you shouldn't have to feel like you can't call your bf if you want to. He shouldn't make you feel bad for wanting to reach out to him. I've been with my bf for close to a year and a half, and we live together. Neither of us are big phone people. During the week I usually talk to him only once a day, when he calls me right after getting off of work to tell me he's on his way home.
Italiana Posted October 23, 2007 Posted October 23, 2007 I don't think it's a bad thing to want to call your bf so often... and if that's what you need and want then thats what you should get. My bf and I have been together for one year and living together for 6 months and we still call eachother 3 times a day... sometimes its more sometimes its less... sometimes he calls more and sometimes it me... Its nice to be on the same page... some people prefer to be "left alone" and others would like constant contact... it's all a preference... you just have to find someone who matches you or someone who understands your needs and fulfills them... If you want to call him you shouldnt resist... you shouldn't "play the game"... your not being too needy... and after 2.5 years if you cannot be yourself and cannot just call him up to say HI or I Love U... for the fear of being TOO NEEDY... than thats just silly and you are repressing your true emotions.... and not getting what you really want in your relationship
Recommended Posts