adrian_85 Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 Ok... I live in an apartment block in NY city, and me and a girl who lives above me two floors have been in a relationship for a couple of months. The two months were great, we had a fantastic time and never argued, however 2 weeks ago she decided she didn't have space for me in her life and told me she needed to end our relationship. She told me I had done nothing wrong and that it was her not me (that old one!), but to be honest that makes me feel awful because I feel she is holding something back. I see her every day pretty much going to and from work etc, and we still chat on the subway etc, and she has told me she wants to remain friends. I wrote her a letter last week explaining my feelings and asking her to find the time to reply, the letter wasn't demanding or angry or anything, I just find it easier than talking to someone. I added that I hoped she would reply or come to chat with me so I could get some closure. She hasn't replied. I don't understand, she is the one who wants to remain friends yet she won't return my emails, letters, anything. She has just gone NC, yet she tells me she wants to be friends. I still feel things for her, and deep down I want her back, but I need to let go I think, even if she took me back I doubt things could be the same. How do you get over someone you live so close to? Adrian New York, NY
blon_dee Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 Oh man.. thats a really tough one.. Having to live so closeby to her... I dont know what u can do here.. Try to get on with your life. Dont hassle her anymore though. IF she wants to talk to you about it ,she will in her own time.. Good luck
Oregon Blackberry Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 I would tell you to go apartment hunting if your lease is up, but I know how hard it is to find a decent place at a decent rent in NYC. I think it is kind she is going NC on you because it is giving you time to heal. I think she doesn't want to talk further about the breakup because it is a very uncomfortable talk. For some reason, she doesn't see you as long term. You were in a relationship for two months and in that time she was "trying you on," so to speak, and in the end, you just weren't a good fit for her. I'm sorry that it hurts. My best advice is to not contact her for a long time and to avoid her if possible. Such as take a different subway or whatever. In this case, you just have to accept it is over.
Pentula77 Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 All I can say is that from what I've learnt you have to go in slowly...guys make the mistake of going too far too fast... Take ur time spartans...
Author adrian_85 Posted October 22, 2007 Author Posted October 22, 2007 thanks for the help everyone. I guess I shall have to give NC a try. Its a real shame because when we broke up she said she wanted to remain close friends. I am not sure that can really happen now and to be quite honest I am not sure how she expects that of me. You can't just drop someone like that, without any great reason and expect them to be ok with it. Maybe you are right that she is doing me a favor going NC. My lease is not going to be up for a few more months yet, so I guess I shall have to go along with things, but yeah, different subway line sounds like a good idea.
Author adrian_85 Posted October 23, 2007 Author Posted October 23, 2007 Well I got a reply from my letter. She says she is finding things really hard too, and is unhappy now we are apart. Does this mean we should try to have another go at things? If so how do I go about it, if not, why not?
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