daisydo Posted October 21, 2007 Posted October 21, 2007 Warning: this is a rant I wrote for my exboyfriend. Instead of sending it to him, I am posting it here. It is very harsh and full of some very intense stuff.. so if you have delicate sensibilities, you may want to skip it. And yes - he probably deserves most of this. I hate you so much for everything you did to me. You treated me like a nonhuman. To you - I was just an object ripe for exploitation. You stole my money - your leached off my kindness and didn't give two s**** about taking everything I did for you for granted. You are a lecherous, disgusting pig. You do not deserve the status of a human being. All those nights when lies would spew from your mouth like black and lime green bile poisoning my mind and making me think that I was being unreasonable, controlling and demanding. You lied to me. You cheated on me. You spread your putrid seed around town without a thought as to who you were hurting. You are selfish and disgusting. You filled your body with poison - you filled my body and mind with lies and cruel manipulations. You let me believe that you cared about me, that you loved me while you just let your disfunction and addiction reap havoc in our lives. You took my money without so much as a thank you. You stole my money and lied about it. You still go out of your way to torture me to this day. All those nights where you were at your friend's house or at the art studio - you were not at those places. You were sleeping with someone else. I never walked in on you - I never caught you in the act.. but I KNOW what you did and it makes me want to vomit all over the place. You are disgusting. You hurt me profoundly. You have f***** me up for almost a year now - periodically reasserting yourself in my life. I am absolutely done with your sick and twisted machinations. I am DONE and I never want to see your bloated, blotchy face and your receding hairline ever again. If you dropped off the face of the earth I would not shed a tear for you. You are a scourge on this planet and cause nothing but pain in your wake. For the longest time I thought you only treated me so poorly because you had issues separate from our relationship. That you were insecure and had many demons to battle. Now I know that you are a malicious human being with no soul to speak of. All I see inside you is a field of bubbling mire with poisonous mushrooms feasting off of all the destruction you have caused in people's lives. You let your mother think you were dead and probably thought it was funny. Your exgirlifriend killed herself partly because of you. You opened up your raunchy gullet and poured the booze down and what came out after was equally as repellent. You were an impish, two year old child throwing tantrums and seeking out every insecurity visible in someone's eyes and prodding it with a fiery poker. You did that to your exgirlfriend. She was 18 and naive and she killed herself because of incessant drunken slurs that you directed at her. Yet everyone still likes you. You have an excessive amount of charm to mask all of your reptilian and vile tendencies. You trick people with your wit and intelligence but you are nothing more than scum. You can only enchant these people for so long before they discover what you really and what you will do to them. You revel in your alcoholism. You think it is a beneficial aspect of your personality and you mocked me for not partaking in your debauchery. You drank so much that you pissed our bed on two occasions yet you ridiculed my lifestyle choice. You mocked me for not going out and drinking myself sick every night and insulted the decent, kind friends that I made. I was an idiot for staying with you for so long and continually making excuses for your behavior. I am grateful that the experience occurred - it has taught me so much about the capacity of human cruelty. When you looked at me some of those nights - with a look so full of hatred - I almost believed that the devil did exist. What you were feeling - that hatred - was not for me, but for yourself because I am sure you saw what you did in my eyes and how much it hurt me. I have heard several people say that they would take a bullet for you in your sober state - but have never met a more horrible person than you when you are drunk. For the longest time I held out for the sober version of you, who seemed like a decent person.. but now I see that the drunken person was with you all the time. They were one in the same. There is no separation in my mind anymore and that is the reason that I can let myself hate you so completely now. Goodbye, Ex. I hope I will never let one of these feelings or thoughts plague my mind or my dreams. I hope by releasing it to the public - somehow it will help set me free. I now see you for what you really are. I will not hope for your redemption - I will not offer some glimmer of hope here at the end. You deserve to suffer for what you have done to so many people. I can only hope that the universe will self-correct and apply appropriate punishment for your cruel deeds.
carolinaboy Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 seems like you are talking about my ex's new bf. i hear ya.
brothermartin Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 I didnt even read it, I just saw a lot of little sensored curse words. Anyway, YEAH!! I HATE MY EX TOO!!! Well, not really. But Im pretty not cool with her right now.
Touche Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 Nope - I'm not Gigi. I'm sorry. I apologize. That was insensitive of me. Some of the other posters have rubbed off on me I think. I didn't mean to make a joke at your expense. I'm very sorry for your pain. I can even relate to so much of it..yeah, my ex. But I met the right one 13 years ago and I hope you do too so you can move on and put this loser behind you.
Michelle74 Posted October 23, 2007 Posted October 23, 2007 must be twin brothers seperated at birth...
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