WonderingWTD Posted October 20, 2007 Posted October 20, 2007 Ok so to ask my question and get the advice that i need, I need to tell you my story. Lets start at the VERY beginning. So I am only 17 years old, but my father and i have never gotten along. I always told him that i wanted to move out and as soon as i got the chance i would leave. When my mom got diagnosed with terminal breast cancer they continued to get worse and I had to leave.. After a short stay with my newly wed sister and brother-in-law, My boyfriend (Alex) offered to let me come and stay with him and his dad until i figured things out and i accepted. I have lived with him since, which will 5 months now. Alex worked at a pizza place where many robberies, fights, and stabbings have gone on. He made really good money, but he quit because he didnt get along well with the managment. Our apartment was in a trashy part of town. The people that lived there were rude, loud and many did drugs. I was always scared to be out alone at night, but one night i was starving. It was really hot inside the apartment and i didnt want to heat it up more by using the oven so i decided just to drive up to Wendy's really quick. Alex was sleeping so i didnt want to wake him, so i just left. My car was beig repaired so i just drove Alex's. On my way back into the apartment, i noticed that i was being followed. He grabbed me and tried to pull me towards his car, i got away and immediately called the police. A report was filed, but not much could be done. After that incident, I no longer felt safe, but i still didn't want to leave Alex. On the following wednesday, my boyfriend and were heading out to his car to go to work when we noticed the windows smoked over. We opened the door and saw that the entire interior to his lexus had been covered in gas and lit on fire. The cops supected the guy that assaulted me because that was the car i was driving. After that, i had to get out. I decided to move in with my sister until alex and i had enough money to get a nice place on a nice side of town, and she even said that alex could also. I was relieved, but then alex sprang the news on me that his mom had bought him a new bed and set up a room for him to live there again until alex and i moved in together. He made us a deal that he would stay 1/2 the week with me and 1/2 the week with his mom. This was bad news for me, i hate sleeping by myself and i dont see alex enough as is. Well now alex wants to work at the pizza place again (and his other job) to make more money. Its so unsafe there and he would work 4pm-4am.. so i would really never see him. it would only be 2-3 nights a week, but then he would stay at his mom's 3 night... that only leaves 1-2 with me. Theres always drunk girls there hitting on him and **** and i just really dont want him to work there, so i said no and freaked out.. he went tonight anyways so now i am avoiding his calls and texts. Am i being pyscho? Or am i right? Any advice on ANYTHING?
LovelyLovely2 Posted October 20, 2007 Posted October 20, 2007 I don't think you're being unreasonable hun, but I do think you need to seriously sit down and talk with Alex about why you're worried and tell him what you're feeling, because if you think he knows how you feel about him working there, he may just assume that you feel fine. If you REALLY don't want him working at this place you need to tell him and why. You do also have to trust him.
Author WonderingWTD Posted October 21, 2007 Author Posted October 21, 2007 I trust Alex so much when it comes to being around other girls, but not when it comes to being around guys. Hes been in a few fights and i dont want him getting hurt. But I did talk to him about it and he told me that everything is going to be ok. I said i still didnt want him to do it and he finally said that he as no matter what i said... hes never been that demanding or selfish.. what do i do now?
popey Posted October 21, 2007 Posted October 21, 2007 Wondering: what you are describing is so far from normal. I'm so sorry to read this. Seriously, stay with your sister. Whatever is going on with Alex, is not in your interest. If you are 17, I'm thinking you are a senior in HS. Get yourself through senior year, and talk to your guidance counselour about getting into a college that you can live at. Don't take no for an answer. It is an option for everyone. (I used to be a financial aid counselour.) Make this your entire focus. I promise you; if you make it your 100% focus, you will find the life you deserve.... if your like me, possibly more than you know to imagine.
Author WonderingWTD Posted October 21, 2007 Author Posted October 21, 2007 I graduated from highschool early and now im attending a local community college. I know my story is very far from normal, but the neighborhood i lived it was very far from normal. Alex isn't the source to all my problems, such as almost being kidnapped. And i see how i made it seem that way. But i just don't no what to do... should i stick it out and let him work there even though im worried? Or should i put my foot down and maybe lose him?
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