forbidden fruit Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 Since I am the one who enacted NC and have a zillion times before, what does Nc mean to the xmm when you finally stick to it and do not play into their mind games or manipulation? Do they give up or do they think of new ways to get around your imposed NC? Just curious
TogetherForever Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 Since I am the one who enacted NC and have a zillion times before, what does Nc mean to the xmm when you finally stick to it and do not play into their mind games or manipulation? Do they give up or do they think of new ways to get around your imposed NC? Just curious First of all, FF, glad you are so strong at this no contact thing. Second, if you stick to nc, it won't matter what HE thinks nc means. Just keep sticking to it & you won't have to deal with how HE is dealing with it. (And are you hoping he does try to manipulate around YOUR nc system?) I hope not. You're doing too well with it to go backwards!!!!! TF
LucreziaBorgia Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 If they act like a petty spoiled child, and try to punish you for enforcing NC - chances are that NC is seen by them like a grumpy toddler sees his preschool teachers when they send him/her to 'time out'. Nothing to be sad about or learn any lessons from, just something that irritates and angers when they don't get their way. Often, they turn it on the OW by taking NC to the limit by multiplying her NC by 100 (in an 'I'll ignore you MORE move') and acting rude and mean about it, and giving snide comments like 'its too bad you are in NC - I could show you how much I love you (without any promises to actually BE with you, note). Sort of like your xMM, FF. And for others: Some MM are relieved that it is over, and there is NC and they can get on with their life. Some MM are sad to have lost someone they loved. Some MM simply don't care at all, and find a more compliant OW. Some MM will emotionally blackmail the OW into breaking NC. It is different for each person. It entirely depends on what led up to the NC, their behavior prior to that enforced NC, and how they react/reacted to it when it happened, and whether or not they have enough respect for the OW to respect her wishes to be in NC. Do any actually leave as a result of the NC? Generally only the ones who were going to divorce anyway.
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