born2fight Posted October 15, 2007 Posted October 15, 2007 I fell in love with a girl who didn't like me. I had a rough break up with my last girlfriend and soon after I was rejected by Cambridge. Plus I was living on my own and I knew that I had to do something so that I stopped feeling sorry for myself so I decided to go for a girl I kind of liked. I wasn't feeling very confident at first because of what had happened and so I didn't make a move because I was hoping that she would hint in some way and make it easier. The problem was that she never did hint but we talked quite a lot and I started liking her more and more by the day until eventually I couldn't take it anymore and I told her how I felt. She said no and she tried not to hurt my feelings but she never really told me why. I asked her if we can still be friends and she said yes. I didn't talk to her for a while but I couldn't stop thinking about her. I called her a few times asking if we can meet up but she kept on postponing it. When I realised I wasn't going to get the chance to see her I went to this library in which she was doing voluntary work as if to borrow some books but we both knew why I was really there. All this, I now realise, was probably the biggest mistake of my life. Soon after that she stopped talking to me altogether. It drove me crazy. Recently someone from the organisation we were both members of this year asked me to speak to her about something so I thought this was a great opportunity to apologise for everything and repair our friendship. I got her number (another terrible mistake) and called her. She said she will send me the info I needed and after that she really let me have it. She called me a creep and told me I was harassing her. I apologised and asked if I could ever talk to her again to which she said 'we'll see'. I know that I was too pushy and I am so sorry about it but she just wouldn't hear it. Every word she said in that conversation killed a little part of me. I just don't know what to do now. I feel like a criminal. Nobody has ever ignored me or anything like that. I can't forget about it because it's in my head virtually every minute of every hour. I don't know whether I should ask a friend I know she really admires to talk to her and tell her how sorry I am and now that I know how she feels about it I would never be pushy again. Or maybe I should just send her a message. Please don't crucify me...I know that what I did was wrong and I would do anything just to be able to talk to her on msn or whatever even if it was like once a month. Writing all this down makes it sound a lot more trivial but it is unbearably painful because I've had a lot of bad luck recently and things are not looking very good at all. I just wanted one thing to work out this year.
Author born2fight Posted October 16, 2007 Author Posted October 16, 2007 Can someone just delete this thread please? Thanks.
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