i went on a date

[angie16]

Its been 7 weeks. I have been through every emotion. I still miss him but keep reminding myself that he left me, he didn't want to marry me, and even if he misses me, i wasn't worth trying to work it out, he let me go.

 

I have been trying to force myself to move on, my biggest fear is that i am still like this 9 months from now. I went on a date.

 

The guy was nice, it was fine, it wasn't bad, it was fine. He even called the next day and asked me out again.

But i have moments when i wish that we were back together. As much as i think I've grown, i still want our old life back.

We are meeting this friday (4 days away -- unless he has changed his mind).

I don't know what to do or say. I know i will never ask to come back, but at this point i don't know if this is good or not. I still love him, i still miss him, but i have grown and moved on and feel much more secure and happy with myself (which i know was the lesson to learn).

 

But i feel even more alone and empty now. I miss him. Even thinking about him with someone else just makes my stomach turn. But i know i have to move on, and naturally he will too.

 

What do i say on friday? I want be positive and wish him the best but i am scared, of being rejected again just by the fact he won't try or talk about maybe getting back together.

am i making any sense?

 

I am really doing better, not even crying every day anymore.

just need some direction.

thanks

[curiousnycgirl]

Good for you for going on a date! I totally understand the feelings you are going through - and I assure you it does get better. Just keep doing what you are doing.

 

Why are you seeing your ex friday? What is the purpose? Who initiated it? Need more info.

[angie16]

we haven't seen each other or talked in over a month. i emailed him, mainly for closure (i was feeling strong) and asked if he wanted to meet up "sometime this month". he wrote right back and said of course. so we chose this date.

i dunno. i am just a ball of confusion and feeling.