carolinaboy Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 I am getting over my ex slowly but surely. I am still deeply hurt by her quickness to jump into a relationship w/ someone while telling me the biggest reason we didnt work out is she is not a conventional relationship type person. There are still things I want to say to her, but I'd sound like a broken record and she is very non responsive anyways. She lives in a town about 20 mins away now where there is a lot of interesting culture and nightlife......there are bands playing, restaurants, bars I want to go to but I know it's her and her sisters turf. I dont want to exclude myself from things I want to do on her account, its just that things are starting to get a little better and I dont want to deal with her trying to be my buddy or talk with her. I do, but there's so much left unclosed that it would be weird and false for me. I hate the guy she got with right after me. Only two mos. after us breaking up she would contact me and I'd try so hard to talk to her and be cool and calm. She would ask excitedly/supportively about new girls and I would not want to tell her. She is so at ease with being buddies I cant tell if it's a front which I could understand or if she really was brainwashed and forgot the last 3 years. Thanks to this site I realize not everyone can be best friends after a break up and that that is ok. Should I just hold off on being in her area until I can totally handle interaction with her, or should i just say screw it and go.
Sanslatete Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 I'd give it some time carolinaboy, I don't think you can become something else to someone you've been in a relationship with that quickly. There's lots of memories and baggage to sift through first and as she's with someone else it may press all the wrong buttons for you if you still care about her. Try to be sure that you're really 100% over her before you make contact, it could undo all the work that you've done so far if you try to put a face on and brave it out before you're ready.
alwayshurt Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 You don't need any answer, my friend. The fact that you're questioning whether to go or not means that you have still feelings for her and are not ready to face the new her. If you were completely over you woud not have these kind of thoughts. I work in the same building where this girl I love works ans for the last month or so I haven't been able to go to the same restaurant where we used to meet because I know I am not ready to face the situation. It all depends how you feel, but if you jump into her you may discover things that may hurt you deeply (like see her w/ somebody else or doing things you would never imagine she is able to do and she wasn't doing with you....freedom after a relationship trasforms us and makes us do crazy things. It happens to everybody. Eventually we go back to earth and responsibility) and still have her around trying to be your best buddy because evidently she has moved on. I personally would avoid places where meeting is possible....but that is just me.
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