Havn_a_life Posted October 19, 2007 Posted October 19, 2007 Havn a life, Thanks for the encouraging words!!...We are getting an annulment. What's his take on you dumping him, getting the annullment? Is that where the whole trying to make you feel guilty is coming from?
Author Highheels74 Posted October 19, 2007 Author Posted October 19, 2007 What's his take on you dumping him, getting the annullment? Is that where the whole trying to make you feel guilty is coming from? Are you kidding? He dumped me!!...After he found out I logged into his myspace, he told me off and said "have a nice life".....he also wrote a long email saying how "at peace" he was for making the right decision and that he will have "no further contact with me".......4 DAYS LATER he doesn't want to break up anymore....he wants me back....and he STILL hasn't apologized for lying to me and deceiving me!! He is still defending himself...he is in denial that he did anything wrong...can you believe that?...BTW I didn't go back with him....He's just concerned about himself and his feelings, not mine, and said I was the cause of this breakup, that it's my fault...
Havn_a_life Posted October 19, 2007 Posted October 19, 2007 You of course know that's not true. I think you've made a good decision not wanting him back. If he lives in denial of doing anything wrong, then I'd hand him your wedding band and say, Well, I guess this meant something different to me than you. I'm sure you weren't making dinner dates with male acquaintances online were you? Of course not. You were still a newlywed. Obviously this guy isn't M material. He sounds more like sleaze matierial. I would have taken great pleasure in his coming back wanting to get back together and you dumping him off. I'd have told HIM to have a nice life.
Unluckilymadlyinlove Posted October 19, 2007 Posted October 19, 2007 I don't think it is right to read our partners personal emails/myspace accounts, but I must admit that I am very guilty of doing exactly that! And, I too have found stuff that was very wrong on his part, and he too got pissed at me for snooping! So, I completely understand where you are coming from. You can apologize for invading his space without disregarding what he has done. He needs to delete his my space (that is what my husband did when we had our incident) because he has crossed the line, disrespected you, and made plans to cheat on you!!! As far as I am concerned emailing another women expressing an interest in her in any way is cheating!!! He definately owes you a HUGE apology and he needs to explain why he did what he did and let you know that he will not do it again. Good Luck!
Author Highheels74 Posted October 20, 2007 Author Posted October 20, 2007 I don't think it is right to read our partners personal emails/myspace accounts, You are right about that...but somehow I knew I was going to get a modified response....I must be psychic or something!?...It has been over a week since this happened and I am still in shock that he did that to me... I am getting over it though and finding satisfaction in knowing that I deserve someone better and will find that one day.
MrsHellnoFire Posted October 20, 2007 Posted October 20, 2007 He used that excuse (of you logging into his email yada yada) to break up with you so he would be able to finally sleep with that other woman. Now that he's thru with her, he wants everything with you back to normal again. Do not buy his bs unless you want a lifetimes of pain and misery a few kids later and you are stuck with him! He's scum.
Havn_a_life Posted October 21, 2007 Posted October 21, 2007 I believe once you M, you both have to be 100% on each other. If there is nothing going on to hide, then each spouse should have everything out in the open. That's how you keep a good M. No secrets, no hidden nothing. Everything I have is open for my H to see. I don't have anything to hide. He knows it. If a spouse doesn't want their spouse to get into their emails, etc. then there's something to hide. This is what I believe.
Author Highheels74 Posted October 22, 2007 Author Posted October 22, 2007 If a spouse doesn't want their spouse to get into their emails, etc. then there's something to hide. This is what I believe. I agree...and obviously here there was something to hide....what hurts most is that his loyalty was NOT with me and he made me look stupid to this girl when he asked her to change the reply... By the way...He will not admit he did anything wrong..this is one of the emails expressing his opinion about this whole incident: "....look...you can see what happened last week through your eyes and I'm seeing it through mine. You're the one that started it and you're the one that kept going and we are broken up because of you...I'm not really concerned about YOU right now and I'm not thinking about how you feel...you're like the mother that kills her children and then demands sympathy because her children died...get this in your head...you're the cause of what happened...you did it..." Can you believe that??
Havn_a_life Posted October 22, 2007 Posted October 22, 2007 He's a worthless F***head, and you know this. I'd scrape him off the bottom of my heel and move on. You are nothing like a mother who kills her kids then wants sympathy. He's the killer of your M. A marriage that's only a few months old, for cripes sake! F*** him! I can't stand a*ssholes like that! I'd tell him to take a long walk off of a short pier and find myself a real man. My H tried to tell me the slut he screwed was nicer than me. Yeah, well, she was also a liar and a sneaky POS gold digger. I'm not that either. That's a bad thing? I'd say good riddance to bad rubbish. You did nothing wrong by reading his private emails. Hey, atleast you learned a valuable lesson. Thank the idiot for it and get single real quick. I think you're a strong woman and you have good instincts. Just look at it this way. If you'd not checked the emails, he'd be cheating on you right now behind your back and coming home acting like everything's hunky dorry! Possibly giving you an STD or worse! That's pond scum right there. What a sleaze bag. Let the slut have him. She really does deserve him, doesn't she? He screwed up your M, not you. Get that annullment. You'll thank yourself one day for it.
SugaDumplin Posted October 23, 2007 Posted October 23, 2007 I don't know how you're doing it. I made the mistake of marrying a man after the lies and all of the cheating and we weren't married two years before he was cheating again. So if I were you, I'd pull out while I can.
Author Highheels74 Posted October 23, 2007 Author Posted October 23, 2007 I don't know how you're doing it. I made the mistake of marrying a man after the lies and all of the cheating and we weren't married two years before he was cheating again. So if I were you, I'd pull out while I can. Sorry to hear about what you went through...I moved out of his house two weeks after we got married...we got back together for a couple months and I knew that I shouldn't move back into the house so I didn't...I'm so glad I didn't and I'm looking forward to moving on....I can't stand him..
Havn_a_life Posted October 23, 2007 Posted October 23, 2007 Good for you Highheels74! You sound like a really strong person. More of us could learn a thing or two from you. lol Good luck with that future! Maybe it's bright enough to wear shades? (sorry, had to get that in there. lol) But, sincerely, blessings to you!
crazy_grl Posted October 24, 2007 Posted October 24, 2007 I agree...and obviously here there was something to hide....what hurts most is that his loyalty was NOT with me and he made me look stupid to this girl when he asked her to change the reply... By the way...He will not admit he did anything wrong..this is one of the emails expressing his opinion about this whole incident: "....look...you can see what happened last week through your eyes and I'm seeing it through mine. You're the one that started it and you're the one that kept going and we are broken up because of you...I'm not really concerned about YOU right now and I'm not thinking about how you feel...you're like the mother that kills her children and then demands sympathy because her children died...get this in your head...you're the cause of what happened...you did it..." Can you believe that?? Wow. What a d*ck. I hate people who do sh*tty things and try to make the other person think they're they one with the problem.
Author Highheels74 Posted October 24, 2007 Author Posted October 24, 2007 He's a worthless F***head, and you know this. I'd scrape him off the bottom of my heel and move on. You are nothing like a mother who kills her kids then wants sympathy. He's the killer of your M. A marriage that's only a few months old, for cripes sake! F*** him! I can't stand a*ssholes like that! I'd tell him to take a long walk off of a short pier and find myself a real man. My H tried to tell me the slut he screwed was nicer than me. Yeah, well, she was also a liar and a sneaky POS gold digger. I'm not that either. That's a bad thing? I'd say good riddance to bad rubbish. You did nothing wrong by reading his private emails. Hey, atleast you learned a valuable lesson. Thank the idiot for it and get single real quick. I think you're a strong woman and you have good instincts. Just look at it this way. If you'd not checked the emails, he'd be cheating on you right now behind your back and coming home acting like everything's hunky dorry! Possibly giving you an STD or worse! That's pond scum right there. What a sleaze bag. Let the slut have him. She really does deserve him, doesn't she? He screwed up your M, not you. Get that annullment. You'll thank yourself one day for it. THANK YOU. Also, for the words you use to describe F****head, *sshole, bad rubbish, pond scum, sleaze bag, YUP YOU GOT IT RIGHT!!!
Author Highheels74 Posted October 24, 2007 Author Posted October 24, 2007 Wow. What a d*ck. I hate people who do sh*tty things and try to make the other person think they're they one with the problem. What amazes me is that people like that must think the rest of the world is stupid or something....he said I DIDN'T catch him in a lie!....Hello?...Like I didn't read the email messages??....Like my eyes were fooling me or something??.....Like it was just an optical illusion?.....amazing.....just un-f*cking-believable people can be like that....here's another part of an email he sent me about this: [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]"What you need to understand is that what happened last week was something that you created in your mind and just would not let it go..." [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT]
crazy_grl Posted October 24, 2007 Posted October 24, 2007 "What you need to understand is that what happened last week was something that you created in your mind and just would not let it go..." I guess he thinks he can convince you that you hallucinated the email where he asked some chick to help him lie to you. You're right, he must think the rest of the world is stupid. I have a feeling that when he finally realizes you're not backing down and you won't apologize (because you didn't do anything wrong), he's going to try to come crawling back.
Havn_a_life Posted October 24, 2007 Posted October 24, 2007 THANK YOU. Also, for the words you use to describe F****head, *sshole, bad rubbish, pond scum, sleaze bag, YUP YOU GOT IT RIGHT!!! I reached back to when my H told me about his A. LOL
Havn_a_life Posted October 24, 2007 Posted October 24, 2007 What amazes me is that people like that must think the rest of the world is stupid or something....he said I DIDN'T catch him in a lie!....Hello?...Like I didn't read the email messages??....Like my eyes were fooling me or something??.....Like it was just an optical illusion?.....amazing.....just un-f*cking-believable people can be like that....here's another part of an email he sent me about this: [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]"What you need to understand is that what happened last week was something that you created in your mind and just would not let it go..." [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] OMG! He's trying the ole "you're crazy. you didn't see what you think you did" trick. Oh, Girl! Be glad you are getting that annullment and run don't walk away from any memory you ever had about him. He's the one who's delusional. That's creepy! I'd look at it his way, when you find a real man, you can tell him about your creepy xH and watch his face turn blue because he's so revolted that any man could say that about you. It's kind of on the bright side, sorta. LOL
abeliever Posted October 24, 2007 Posted October 24, 2007 May I ask you a quesion? And others too? Why are some of "women" willing to cheat with a married man? Does this even sound like a stable person? I mean really. Why would she agree to cheat and deceive you (his wife) and really think he would never do the same to her? One of my H gf called me to say I never knew him and he loved her. I said great then you can come and clean his house and wash his clothes! And I also informed her she wasn't the ONLY other woman! She didn't believe me so I played telephone conversations that was taped by me in his car. Faxed his phone records for last three months so she could see he was talking to other women too. That eventually broke them up about 2 months later she couldn't BELIEVE he would do that to her! I said silly girl your 23 yrs old and I am loyal to all my sister women first then to a man! This is a lesson you learned early. Don't date married men or taken men period and save yourself a lifetime of heartache. I want to say all men are not bad. I do know this -- but I have seen a lot of bad ones. Not looking yet, but I hope one day to find a true man one who knows his bounderies! I wish you best of luck and peace in your life. abeliever
Author Highheels74 Posted October 25, 2007 Author Posted October 25, 2007 May I ask you a quesion? And others too? Why are some of "women" willing to cheat with a married man? abeliever I really think women will go with a married man because they have a low self-esteem and don't believe they can do better, or deserve better...It's a lack of self-respect...
Havn_a_life Posted October 26, 2007 Posted October 26, 2007 I agree. If a person can have an A with a M person, then they can't have any respect for themselves. The action itself is disrespectful.
Recommended Posts