funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 I have a question to ask! Is there a woman out there who trully wants to be loved by a guy? that will give as well as recive? that will talk about things? is there a woman that is feminin, and knows how to be a girl? whos idea of a night out is not getting hammered at a local club!! is there a woman that wants to be looked after, and massarged after a hard day, and that i can cook for , and run a barth for? and will walk holding hands in the contryside? or by the sea? are their woman who still want this life? or am i from a different planet?
Ruby Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 Yes there is ! BUT dont lay it all on thick at the beginning - That is so off putting! Oh and dont use that in a dating site either (a bit corny honey) But the answer is yes
The Collector Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 Yes there is ! BUT dont lay it all on thick at the beginning - That is so off putting! Exactly. They have to earn it or you will seem needy and desperate.
Author funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 its just a simple question folks, that does not need to be over analized!
datingmum Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 That's all I want in the whole wide world. I want fun too, but in moderation. Mostly, it's the everyday ways that we show love that are the most real, valued and beautiful. I'd give anything to have my ex back, running my bath, making me tea in the morning, helping me with the kids at night.... Our modern world tells women that it is no longer enough to just enjoy being a mother, a wife, a lover. Now, we have to have the huge career, the hobbies, etc and there just isn't the quality of life to be enjoyed anymore. Women can enjoy partnership/motherhood/etc if they are with a hardworking, generous, understanding partner, but even then, it's exhausting!
Tony T Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 I have a question to ask! Is there a woman out there who trully wants to be loved by a guy? that will give as well as recive? that will talk about things? is there a woman that is feminin, and knows how to be a girl? whos idea of a night out is not getting hammered at a local club!! is there a woman that wants to be looked after, and massarged after a hard day, and that i can cook for , and run a barth for? and will walk holding hands in the contryside? or by the sea? are their woman who still want this life? or am i from a different planet? They were around 40 or 50 years ago. The women's movement changed much of that. The media did the rest. Listen to the Cyndi Lauper song, Girls Just Want to Have Fun. That sort of sums it up for these days. If you really want this sort of women, go to a nearby rest home or ACLF (Assisted Living Facility). You were born too late, my friend...and it's really a shame. And for young people these days looking for a mate, male or female, 85 percent of them are totally into themselves and out for themselves. Selfishness and selfcenteredness does not make for a very good relationship. How many ads in the personals do you read where the person says what they will do for someone else. It's all about what THEY want for themselves.
datingmum Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 Please don't, there are girls (HOT girls too) out there who really, really do want these things. It's just a matter of weeding out the ones not interested in these things really quickly so you can keep moving on to the ones who do... I am so sad today, and I'd just kill for that
Author funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 They were around 40 or 50 years ago. The women's movement changed much of that. The media did the rest. Listen to the Cyndi Lauper song, Girls Just Want to Have Fun. That sort of sums it up for these days. If you really want this sort of women, go to a nearby rest home or ACLF (Assisted Living Facility). You were born too late, my friend...and it's really a shame. And for young people these days looking for a mate, male or female, 85 percent of them are totally into themselves and out for themselves. Selfishness and selfcenteredness does not make for a very good relationship. was i really born too late? your saying that women are now guys with boobs!! i love to get drunk and have fun, but it seems that so many women are into drama, and its a shame, as are men too. What is the answer to go with the flow, or keep looking? My reason for this question is i recently joined a dating site, the women have pics, some showing their arses, and boobs, some showing a pint in a club, getting lashed! im mean is this it!! ha ha or do they want what i said, but are afraid?
Hurt & Alone Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 This is exactly what I have been searching for but it is hard to find a man that does all the above. Don't get me wrong I like to go to the Club, but, usually only when I am single.
Tony T Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 Because people are as self centered as they are these days, they are seldom willing to give massages and do other things without some incredible motivation...and, even then, they will stop when the motivation ceases...just like trained seals. Few people will do anything these days out of an altruistic desire to do something nice for someone else. Where have you been?
Author funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 ha ha you in the uk?? what do you think of dating sites?
Hurt & Alone Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 ha ha you in the uk?? what do you think of dating sites? No, I am in the US. Dont do dating sites because they are too frightning. Never know who is truly on the other end.
Author funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 Because people are as self centered as they are these days, they are seldom willing to give massages and do other things without some incredible motivation...and, even then, they will stop when the motivation ceases...just like trained seals. Few people will do anything these days out of an altruistic desire to do something nice for someone else. Where have you been? In a relationship !! and you? out of interest have you found her ?
Tony T Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 In a relationship !! and you? out of interest have you found her ? OK, let me get this straight. You are IN A RELATIONSHIP and yet you have put up the original post? I really don't understand. You don't like the lady you're with? You are simply looking for other options? Right now I date around and am enjoying my life. I am, thankfully, not dependent on women for my happiness. Now and then I happen on a lady who is just like the one you're looking for but other things get in the way...like she's on the FBI's ten most wanted list or her teeth are falling out (j/k). I have actually found some very nice ladies over the years but it just wasn't the right time for me. Also, I'm a bit older than most people on here so I was lucky enough to have lived during the time when people were more kind and gentle.
Spinderella Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 I dont like to generalise or speak for other women, but, I think its what every woman wants! I think drama is a consequence of unrest, which is a common ailment nowadays. I dont know about laying it on thick at the beginning. I dont think thats a bad thing, but, I do think that the foundation should be trust, also that, people like to know they earned it. So theres a certain lack of trust if somebody is ready to give all of this so soon after meeting someone.
Author funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 no that finished a few months ago, but been dating and thats what i have found, but had all you described selfishness etc in my last relationship, thats why i joined here back in april. Im good in myself, and feel iv moved very forward, and know what i want, but god, is a high order!!
Author funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 OK, let me get this straight. You are IN A RELATIONSHIP and yet you have put up the original post? I really don't understand. You don't like the lady you're with? You are simply looking for other options? Right now I date around and am enjoying my life. I am, thankfully, not dependent on women for my happiness. Now and then I happen on a lady who is just like the one you're looking for but other things get in the way...like she's on the FBI's ten most wanted list or her teeth are falling out (j/k). I have actually found some very nice ladies over the years but it just wasn't the right time for me. Also, I'm a bit older than most people on here so I was lucky enough to have lived during the time when people were more kind and gentle. VEry good, im 41 my first relationship lasted 9 years 20 years ago, she was wonderful. ever since i have found this, just plain selfishness, and put the buck on me.
Ocean-Blue Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 I have a question to ask! Is there a woman out there who trully wants to be loved by a guy? that will give as well as recive? that will talk about things? is there a woman that is feminin, and knows how to be a girl? whos idea of a night out is not getting hammered at a local club!! is there a woman that wants to be looked after, and massarged after a hard day, and that i can cook for , and run a barth for? and will walk holding hands in the contryside? or by the sea? are their woman who still want this life? or am i from a different planet? Is that a rhetorical question? I don't know any woman that doesn't want this. I want to be pampered and I want to pamper. I want to be loved and love. I want receive and to give. I am feminine and assertive... I like to take care of my man and love it when he takes care of me... You get my point right? There are MANY of us out there. All of my girlfriends (even the most "modern" ones) are like this. Anyone who says otherwise is lying. You know what your post reminded me of? The struggle b/w individualist thinking and collective thinking. The "I and you" vs. the "we and us". This contrast is especially glaring when you compare certain cultures. I find that some people subscribe to the individualist school of thought...they think along the lines of "me" and "I". I get the sense that this is where your frustration comes from. It can be somewhat disillusioning when you go out into the world in the hopes of finding someone who wants to be part of a 'we' - a collective...but instead you find the "Is". I hope my rambling makes sense. Keep looking OP...you'll find her.
Author funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 It kind of does, but how many women would write like you just did!! ha ha. I have ben working alot on myself, and my own self awreness and the more i have done this, the more you see the pain (selfishness etc) in others, and think its not what i want. But do you go with this and try to fix, or keep looking for the one that does it!! Im feeling good in myself, but yes i guess a battle is going on between keep looking, and going with what is.
Ocean-Blue Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 It kind of does, but how many women would write like you just did!! ha ha. I have ben working alot on myself, and my own self awreness and the more i have done this, the more you see the pain (selfishness etc) in others, and think its not what i want. But do you go with this and try to fix, or keep looking for the one that does it!! Im feeling good in myself, but yes i guess a battle is going on between keep looking, and going with what is. If it's important that you find a woman who shares your views, then don't compromise. That's the beauty of this world - there are a variety of people. I don't think you should change yourself just because you haven't met someone that fits your "criteria". I'm quite baffled that the women you've met shy away from being treated with love, respect, and caring. Where the heck do you live? Seriously, if your biggest problem is not being able to find a woman who is receptive to your lovin'...well I say you're doing alright. It's only a matter of time till you are drawing that bath and cooking that meal. However, as one other poster may've mentioned...REMEMBER to keep it all in moderation. Sometimes, too much of a good thing is...well, it's a bad thing. It freaks a woman out if a guy is always fawning over her...pandering to her every whim. Get me? Tis all a balance dear OP.
Author funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 another thin BTW is that i have noticed in the months that iv been here, most of us are looking for help, and guidence, or to vent. Its no wonder that so far all have said this is what they want, cos we are the ones that feel. Now im saying many choose to deal in their own way, but im talking about the ones that are not here, that choose to go back out their with unresolved pain, and look for another relationship, they are the ones that i seem to encounter, but what is the percentage? so many it seems go back out their and pretend all is well, then change, you see all the issues and the pain, it becomes our fault, our problem, thats why it ends, cos we lose who we were when we entered some elses world of shattered dreams and pain that they have not delt with. UIt was a good thing for me, my last relationship, as it made me look to my issues, my pain, and to become more self aware, but in that procecess you see the pain in other people, gorls on dating sites, looking lost, in clubs ''i want a man to make me laugh' etc. Of course its my choice to stay or go, but in my search this is what im finding. Is it me??
Ocean-Blue Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 another thin BTW is that i have noticed in the months that iv been here, most of us are looking for help, and guidence, or to vent. Its no wonder that so far all have said this is what they want, cos we are the ones that feel. Now im saying many choose to deal in their own way, but im talking about the ones that are not here, that choose to go back out their with unresolved pain, and look for another relationship, they are the ones that i seem to encounter, but what is the percentage? so many it seems go back out their and pretend all is well, then change, you see all the issues and the pain, it becomes our fault, our problem, thats why it ends, cos we lose who we were when we entered some elses world of shattered dreams and pain that they have not delt with. UIt was a good thing for me, my last relationship, as it made me look to my issues, my pain, and to become more self aware, but in that procecess you see the pain in other people, gorls on dating sites, looking lost, in clubs ''i want a man to make me laugh' etc. Of course its my choice to stay or go, but in my search this is what im finding. Is it me?? Some of us are broken...and we have our own way of trying to "fix" ourselves. You sound like you're still recovering from something...perhaps now's the time to focus on yourself. The lady to keep will follow eventually...
Author funkybassplayer Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 If it's important that you find a woman who shares your views, then don't compromise. That's the beauty of this world - there are a variety of people. I don't think you should change yourself just because you haven't met someone that fits your "criteria". I'm quite baffled that the women you've met shy away from being treated with love, respect, and caring. Where the heck do you live? Seriously, if your biggest problem is not being able to find a woman who is receptive to your lovin'...well I say you're doing alright. It's only a matter of time till you are drawing that bath and cooking that meal. However, as one other poster may've mentioned...REMEMBER to keep it all in moderation. Sometimes, too much of a good thing is...well, it's a bad thing. It freaks a woman out if a guy is always fawning over her...pandering to her every whim. Get me? Tis all a balance dear OP. I understand, but no i dont do this to the point of madness, but i do do this with women, and you still in return get selfishness, and projecting crap at me, for really trying to do what i feel is right! No im not a softie, i give as good as i get, and hav shared many of these momnets with the ex, but their was always a dark cloud above our heads, of arguing, and not trusting, and not caring about my wants and my feelings.
Lizzie60 Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 I have a question to ask! Is there a woman out there who trully wants to be loved by a guy? that will give as well as recive? that will talk about things? is there a woman that is feminin, and knows how to be a girl? whos idea of a night out is not getting hammered at a local club!! is there a woman that wants to be looked after, and massarged after a hard day, and that i can cook for , and run a barth for? and will walk holding hands in the contryside? or by the sea? are their woman who still want this life? or am i from a different planet? I would think that most women would want that ... but to be honest with you... I don't. To be loved, to receive and to give love... yesss of course... who doesn't. To be looked after... that's where I have a problem... I don't want a man who will run around in front of me to cater to all my 'desires'... I would lose interest in him real fast. I want someone who would be my equal... independant, emotionally secured... as well as financially stable... I want a man who is rather rough on the edge but is a gentleman, who adores me but is not making 'summersaults' to my smallest wish. Mind you... I hate to cook...so if he'd cook.. I would be sooooo happy... I would give it back in another way...
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