darklight Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 Hi everyone,it's my first post here and how i wish i was in a better mood. 6 weeks ago,we've ended our 4 years relation,the reason was her second BIG lie,i don't trust her anymore but she didn't stop calling and i didn't answer. Today, i knew from a friend that she's seeing a new guy,so i answer her call and ask her what does she want from me,she denied her new bf but we had a fight and then she told me about him. Now(at the time i'm reading topics about lies)she sent an email telling me that it's over with her new bf,and she wants me back,it's driving me insane and i don't know how to deal with her,keep in mind that my family loves her and they want her back,but i don't trust her! can sombody help
Sanslatete Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 You need trust to keep a relationship going darklight, without that it's a series of mind-****s and suspicion. I still love my ex, but I dislike her too and I know I could never trust her again. Once bitten, twice shy as the saying goes, or...., even better...Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.
MattyTee Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 I'm afraid I'm not much of a realist, so... I agree with Sans that trust is necessary for your relationship. However, I think that there can be a chance to rebuild trust - it will take work (on her part). If you think that she's genuine about wanting to get back with you and you want that too then talk to her and let her know it will take some work. Whatever that means - i.e. going to a counselor together etc. One more thing, this really isn't about your family. As much as they might love her this is about you - what really matters is do you love her and do you want to be with her. If the answers to those questions are yes then I would say go for it - but take it slow and let her build up your trust. If she doesn't want to put that effort in then unfortunately it means she's probably not genuine about wanting to be with you.
Author darklight Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 thanks for your replies guys,i'm not answering her calls anymore and it's realy hard,but i'll be a lier if i said that i'm not waiting for the day she admits that she was wrong,maybe then i can help her to work on herself.
wizer Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 If the day comes that she "admits that she is wrong", then it will be the day that she tells you yet another lie.
Author darklight Posted October 17, 2007 Author Posted October 17, 2007 If the day comes that she "admits that she is wrong", then it will be the day that she tells you yet another lie. well the day has come,and i'm affraid Wizer's right! she came to my house this morning,she said she was wrong and need me to help her. Afternoon,her sister pass by to BLESS us,and when we were talking,she said that she's going with her husband to have dinner at night,so i though i should have dinner with my "lover" too,i took her and when i asked her where does she want to have dinner,she replyed: "i had dinner with my sister,let's go to a pub"!!! see what i'm talking about?now,shame on me!
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