buzzie2 Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 I was hoping I could get some feedback about what just recently happened to me. Well a year and a half ago I got dumped by my long distant bf. He didn't even give me an explanation why he dumped me, he just said "goodbye" over msn messenger and he blocked me from seeing him on line. I never got any closure, and although he broke my heart I tried contacting him about 8 months ago to try to get back together. Well the jerk ignored my call I left on his cell and didn't respond to the email or letter I sent. So I sort of gave up on ever get back together with him. I thought this man was "the one" and I would spend my life with him, what a joke. The strange thing was that although he was ignoring me his best friend was coming around the store I work in to talk to me, although he never mentioned me ex I think he was "fishing" for him. So anyways, about a week ago my ex sent me his updated profile, and in it he was sitting next to another woman and holding hands. I couldn't believe he would send me the update, he still has me blocked from seeing him online! My question is, why do you think after all this time he would send that to me? Does it mean he still cares or is just being a jerk? And is this the final closure that I need? What do you guys think?
CanyonWall Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 Let's see: 1) dumps you on msn 2) sends someone around to see what's up with you 3) sends hurtful statements about him dating. I'd go with jerk.
marlena Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 Sorry but yes, Jerk with a capital J. Yes, most definitely this should be the proverbial straw that broke you know whose back. Move on. He isn't worth your time or energy.
jophil28 Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 I was hoping I could get some feedback about what just recently happened to me. Well a year and a half ago I got dumped by my long distant bf. He didn't even give me an explanation why he dumped me, he just said "goodbye" over msn messenger and he blocked me from seeing him on line. I never got any closure, and although he broke my heart I tried contacting him about 8 months ago to try to get back together. Well the jerk ignored my call I left on his cell and didn't respond to the email or letter I sent. So I sort of gave up on ever get back together with him. I thought this man was "the one" and I would spend my life with him, what a joke. The strange thing was that although he was ignoring me his best friend was coming around the store I work in to talk to me, although he never mentioned me ex I think he was "fishing" for him. So anyways, about a week ago my ex sent me his updated profile, and in it he was sitting next to another woman and holding hands. I couldn't believe he would send me the update, he still has me blocked from seeing him online! My question is, why do you think after all this time he would send that to me? Does it mean he still cares or is just being a jerk? And is this the final closure that I need? What do you guys think? Yeh he is quite a baitch - ain't he? Seriously - that is crappy behavior from a MAN. He is deliberately rubbing salt into your wounds by showing you that he has moved on to someone else. Spiteful , vindictive and UNMANLY. I wanna slap him for doing that shyte.
The Collector Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 Long distance relationships never work. It's been a year and a half. You should've stopped caring a long time ago.
buckdawg Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 Long distance relationships never work. It's been a year and a half. You should've stopped caring a long time ago. ^^^^ wut he said. WTH have you been doing? certainly not pining away i hope. this guy was a train wreck from the start and he did you a favor. let me tell you, only a gutless coward would break up over IM. your job is to get over, do you really need closure from this butthole, and moveon!!!
daphne Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 I wish women had an aversion to guys who treat them like crap. If this guy treated me like that, I wouldn't be asking why or is he a jerk. I'd be removing every last trace of him from my life and know that I deserve better, have had better, and won't settle for a sick f#@ who doesn't know how to treat people and who karma will run down a little later in life without my help. Women tend to take entirely far too much blame for the way a guy behaves. Any blame we accept is too much.
The Collector Posted October 13, 2007 Posted October 13, 2007 Women tend to take entirely far too much blame for the way a guy behaves. Any blame we accept is too much. Whatever the sex, the dumpee blames themselves and the dumper justifies their behaviour. Are you suggesting women should never blame themselves for things they did wrong?
jophil28 Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 Are you suggesting women should never blame themselves for things they did wrong? I checked the Guiness Book of Records - there is NO entry describing a woman accepting accountability for her blunders.
daphne Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 Whatever the sex, the dumpee blames themselves and the dumper justifies their behaviour. Are you suggesting women should never blame themselves for things they did wrong? If you stick to what I said, you'd realize whatever your asking is completely outside the scope of the conversation. I didn't say women shouldn't take accountability for their actions. THey shouldn't take the blame for when a guy treats them like crap. I see some guys doing this as well, but far more women on this forum doing it.
Mezzi Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 How is he being cruel? Im sorry, but to me he is just sending you the loud and clear message that you are NOT to write him any more letters, email, call and leave messages for him. He is not interested in hearing from you and as sad as that may make you its the reality of the issue. He has moved on, I suggest you do the same.
Lizzie60 Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 You say: I got dumped by my long distant bf. Was it a long distance relationship? How long did you date? But to answer your question.. I think he's a miserable loser... forget about him... Repeat after me: This freaken jerk doesn't deserve me... I am worth much more!
nittygritty Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 Its possible that he has a jealous and insecure girlfriend that sent you his updated profile with a picture of the two of them together. Regardless, the way he broke up with you was immature and he does sound like a jerk. I wouldn't ever contact him again if I were you. Do not accept any form of contact that he may attempt in the future either. Do accept that its over for good and move on with your life. You will feel much better once you realize that you deserve better treatment and see the reality of the kind of person he is.
jcster Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 Closure is a myth, there is only moving on and letting the past be behind you. It's high time for that, don't you think?
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