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True or False, Who ever replied to who first on a dating service should do most of

DateAnalyzer

By DateAnalyzer
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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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the talking during the first conversation correct? I mean it was obviously something that caught their eye about what i was saying in the ad so shouldn;t they be inquiring more about what i said I was about or like doing? same thing if I replied to a woman, if I called her after replying to her first, why would she be doing most of the talking when she was the one who SPARK MY INTEREST?

 

Does any of this make sense or should I start living in the NUT HOUSE?

reboot Established Member

reboot

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Something wrong with two-way conversations?

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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Something wrong with two-way conversations?

 

 

No but in the first 5 minutes she should defintely be starting the convo off since she replied to my ad first. And then the longer the convo, the more balance it would be

 

 

That's like if i go outside right now and approach a girl, she would expect me to do most of the talking because I was the one who stopped and approached her. Why would I expect her to ask me things in the very beginning when i was the one who saw how sexy she was and say-"HEY, do you have a minute?

Star Gazer Established Member

Star Gazer

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Does any of this make sense or should I start living in the NUT HOUSE?

 

No, and yes.

 

Something wrong with two-way conversations?

 

Precisely my question.

allina Established Member

allina

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should I start living in the NUT HOUSE?

 

..................................................:)

 

*nods*

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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No, and yes.

 

 

 

Precisely my question.

 

 

so if you get approached in the street by someone you wouldn't be confused by him or her not saying that much when they were the one who STOPPED you in your tracks????????????????????????????????????

Saxis Established Member

Saxis

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I get where you're coming from, but I think it's too many "expectations" for a first encounter. Who says you have to drill each other with questions? I went through that with a girl I met online, and it got boring, quickly!

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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I get where you're coming from, but I think it's too many "expectations" for a first encounter. Who says you have to drill each other with questions? I went through that with a girl I met online, and it got boring, quickly!

 

My point is if I'm advertising myself and the girl replies, it only makes sense that she JUMP STARTS the conversation since something in the ad intrigued her

Saxis Established Member

Saxis

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Hmm, that depends. If you laid out your add with general personality, hobbies/interests and such, then maybe she feels like you should be finding this stuff out about her? After all, you haven't had a chance to read a profile with all of her interests and things...

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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Hmm, that depends. If you laid out your add with general personality, hobbies/interests and such, then maybe she feels like you should be finding this stuff out about her? After all, you haven't had a chance to read a profile with all of her interests and things...

 

 

The one who makes the very first CALL is supposed to JUMP START the first conversation. I gave her my number so she has to impress ME in the first 15 min

reboot Established Member

reboot

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The one who makes the very first CALL is supposed to JUMP START the first conversation. I gave her my number so she has to impress ME in the first 15 min
Where in hell did you read this rule?

 

And you wonder why they hang up on you......

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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Where in hell did you read this rule?

 

And you wonder why they hang up on you......

 

 

So someone replies to your ad, you give them your number, and when they call you he/she doesn't have much to say and you wouldn't be CONFUSED by that since they replied to a Ad that YOU POSTED????????

popey Established Member

popey

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nuthouse. lol. you should both speak and both listen. and keep in mind, there are personal preference to quantity of conversation, that sometimes takes time to pick up on between two people

soulseeker Established Member

soulseeker

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I swear...

 

FFS DA, dont you want to know anything about her?

 

I really dont get why the dating process is *THIS* difficult for you. How do you get to know friends? The same basic principles apply to getting to know someone you want to date. If you dont ask her questions, she may think you are not interested in getting to know her...and walk away or hang up. Same thing applies when you want to get to know someone as a friend.

amber1 Established Member

amber1

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If I reply to an online ad and the guy just gives me his number without me asking, I don't call.

 

Maybe your ad is just attracting the boring or stupid girls. I don't know. But anyway, when these girls call, are you adding to the conversation? If she asks you a question and after you answer, do you in turn ask her a question?

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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I swear...

 

FFS DA, dont you want to know anything about her?

 

I really dont get why the dating process is *THIS* difficult for you. How do you get to know friends? The same basic principles apply to getting to know someone you want to date. If you dont ask her questions, she may think you are not interested in getting to know her...and walk away or hang up. Same thing applies when you want to get to know someone as a friend.

 

 

 

I just prefer a girl come off as INTERESTED in the first 5 min which would then allow me to feed off of her and then the convo would have a nice flow.

soulseeker Established Member

soulseeker

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You need to be interested too! Regardless of how you want life to be, this is how it works. Just accept this and life will be soooo much easier for you. Think of it this way, why would a person want to be friends with/date someone who brought nothing to the table? No one wants to work as hard as you want them to. It's just not worth it. Likely, youre not the only guy these women are meeting.

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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If I reply to an online ad and the guy just gives me his number without me asking, I don't call.

 

Maybe your ad is just attracting the boring or stupid girls. I don't know. But anyway, when these girls call, are you adding to the conversation? If she asks you a question and after you answer, do you in turn ask her a question?

 

 

I like a female to be LIVELY/PLEASANT when she calls so I can then add to the convo. I don't want to get the vibe tht she is not serious about meeting and just calling me because she is bored

jcster Established Member

jcster

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or should I start living in the NUT HOUSE?

 

....you mean you're not already there?

uniqueone Established Member

uniqueone

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Does any of this make sense or should I start living in the NUT HOUSE?

 

The nurse just called. She said to get back to your floor pronto.....and no more hiding your meds.......

 

 

There's no "set" rules for dating (in my book anyway).

 

It's possible, she's shy or not a good conversationalist.

It's possible that she likes men to initiate.

 

Maybe you said you were outgoing in your ad and she figured you'd lead the conversation.

Maybe she's a better listener than talker.

 

Maybe you said something or gave off some vibe that made her not as interested as before.

Maybe she heard nurse Ratchet in the background telling you that your phone time was up.

 

Could be any of those things.

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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The nurse just called. She said to get back to your floor pronto.....and no more hiding your meds.......

 

 

There's no "set" rules for dating (in my book anyway).

 

It's possible, she's shy or not a good conversationalist.

It's possible that she likes men to initiate.

 

Maybe you said you were outgoing in your ad and she figured you'd lead the conversation.

Maybe she's a better listener than talker.

 

Maybe you said something or gave off some vibe that made her not as interested as before.

Maybe she heard nurse Ratchet in the background telling you that your phone time was up.

 

Could be any of those things.

 

 

 

No one should ever be shy over the phone, face to face yes, but over the phone means there is seriously something wrong with that person

reboot Established Member

reboot

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You sure have a lot of rules no one else has ever heard of.

uniqueone Established Member

uniqueone

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No one should ever be shy over the phone, face to face yes, but over the phone means there is seriously something wrong with that person

 

Ok, then there's seriously something wrong with her then and you can move on. Sounds simple to me!

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