dgiirl Posted November 16, 2007 Posted November 16, 2007 I am not a woman hater, I just want the good guys to be careful about the numerous poisonous women around. hahahahhaha Best line ever!! No no, of course you are not a woman hater. I believe ya.
Author ilmw Posted November 17, 2007 Author Posted November 17, 2007 hahahahhaha Best line ever!! No no, of course you are not a woman hater. I believe ya. Now, now Dgiirl...
Author ilmw Posted November 17, 2007 Author Posted November 17, 2007 Here's the link to ilmw's original thread http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t90264/ Thx..Gunny...saves me typing... done way to much of that at work lately... I think where I work... has gone totally nuts...!!
Author ilmw Posted November 17, 2007 Author Posted November 17, 2007 ilmw knows the reasons she left and will make sure it will not happen again. It’s all about the wife’s needs! Ilmw has to please her so she won't leave again. If you want a lasting reconciliation, your wife must understand that it is you giving her a second chance not the other way around. We have learned to screen out poisonous woman before committing to marriage. We also need to make sure the woman we reconcile with is not anymore a poisonous woman. If you say she is genuine, she must be genuine. I am not a woman hater, I just want the good guys to be careful about the numerous poisonous women around. Yeah Ns... she knows this... she has said as much herself.. said she is the luckist woman alive... that I am giving this another shot. She knows I became happy without her and I don't NEED her. Makes all the difference. and Yeah...there lots of poisonous woman out there... I met a few during my dating days... The way some guys and gals on LS have been treated by their stbx's... I could only imagine... there being some hate issues... Like I said in an earlier post... I had these (hate) issues myself.. in a prior LTR. But... hate is not the solution... moving on.. and getting your life back is. Now this is not an overnight solution... because of the raw emotion that this kind of experience exposes. But, soon as we gain control of ourselves... we can take that big sigh... and take the first little step to moving on. Ok... anought of that.. Everyone... have a great day.
notspiritual Posted November 22, 2007 Posted November 22, 2007 hahahahhaha Best line ever!! I don't hate women, I only hate poisonous women. It just happens that the proportion of poisonous women in the female population is close to 80%. The result of this? Smarter men prefer to play around with women. It is the natural thing to do when confronted with so many poisonous women. The number of marriage decreases. Women have it hard to find a decent man to marry. To compete for the decent men, women become less poisonous. I say to men, go play around, you are doing a good thing for society in the long term.
AHIWON Posted November 23, 2007 Posted November 23, 2007 Congrats ilmw! Somewhere down deep inside I knew this would happen! I hope it isn't an 80% poisonous women ratio out there. I am considering only dating women and not allowing my self to get into another relationship any time soon. I am regrouping my thoughts on this and have not come to a final decision. I do not want to be hurt like I was recently any time in the near future. That a for sure objective.
dgiirl Posted November 23, 2007 Posted November 23, 2007 I don't hate women, I only hate poisonous women. It just happens that the proportion of poisonous women in the female population is close to 80%. The result of this? Smarter men prefer to play around with women. It is the natural thing to do when confronted with so many poisonous women. The number of marriage decreases. Women have it hard to find a decent man to marry. To compete for the decent men, women become less poisonous. I say to men, go play around, you are doing a good thing for society in the long term. What a load of crap If you are running into so many "poisonous" women, that says a LOT about YOU and YOUR outlook on life. When you have a negative outlook on life, you see the negatives and make a lot of assumptions to fit your mindset. When you have a positive outlook on life, you see the positives and see other things that fit THAT mindset. I have a hard time believing that 80% of ANY population is that bad, and thus believe the problem is with you. You are obviously not paying much attention to your surroundings and with your negative outlook on life, you will continue to have negative experiences. It's as simple as that. Sure, Men can go play around all they want. But to compete for a decent woman, they too are going to have to be less negative and vindictive and poisonous. Thankfully, I've run into several decent men and have a lot of options if/when the time is needed. But I choose to see the good in people, and karma is rewarding me for it
notspiritual Posted November 23, 2007 Posted November 23, 2007 Thankfully, I've run into several decent men and have a lot of options if/when the time is needed.You don’t seem to understand the human courtship difference between male and female. After a break up it takes on average 3 months for a guy to find a new girlfriend. It takes the woman just one day. Like you said, women have a lot of options. With that kind of settings, it is only natural that most women can afford to be poisonous, never questioning their personality shortcomings. I admit however that the less attractive a woman is (getting old, ugly, have children already) the more decent human being she is. Except for that fat chick in the club who won’t let you talk to her hot friends because she is jealous. I am not negative. I am pragmatic. My outlook on life is very positive. It is fun time.
AHIWON Posted November 23, 2007 Posted November 23, 2007 Perhaps there is only 20% quality women out there. I remember back in my bar experiment days this spring, the women I met were horrible. Some were married, some were single but out for one night stands, some were just screwy. I didn't meet one normal woman in a bar. I would imagine the ratio for good men is not much different. I did far better with online dating. I created a profile that was as close s I could to describe myself and met many quality women that way. At least most of them fit into a loose definition of normal anyway. Still have to be careful tho, even tho there may be no red flags early on, it can take many months or longer to start seeing the whole person that you met and realize who they really are. Just learned that the hard way. Love is a wonderful thing but it really sucks when you get your heart broken. It is a risk I am wiling to take again many more times before I give up on it. Somewhere somehow, something has to give and I find the woman of my dreams.
Author ilmw Posted November 26, 2007 Author Posted November 26, 2007 Perhaps there is only 20% quality women out there. I remember back in my bar experiment days this spring, the women I met were horrible. Some were married, some were single but out for one night stands, some were just screwy. I didn't meet one normal woman in a bar. I would imagine the ratio for good men is not much different. I did far better with online dating. I created a profile that was as close s I could to describe myself and met many quality women that way. At least most of them fit into a loose definition of normal anyway. Still have to be careful tho, even tho there may be no red flags early on, it can take many months or longer to start seeing the whole person that you met and realize who they really are. Just learned that the hard way. Love is a wonderful thing but it really sucks when you get your heart broken. It is a risk I am wiling to take again many more times before I give up on it. Somewhere somehow, something has to give and I find the woman of my dreams. Hey bud! Just caught up with my own thread... Yah know... apparently bars are a lousy place to meet woman in the first place.... LOL There are loads of places you can meet members of the opposite sex... just look at Dgiirl... she met some guys through her photography interests... perfect example of how to meet folks.... and there is less pressure to "pick up"... and there tends to be less... or no booze to cloud your judgement... When you no longer give a damn about being with another person... that is the time to be with someone.... Trust me on that one... As for an up date.... things are going great... we are going to social events as a couple again... mainly my work. Everyone I know of has approached me.. and has said how happy they are things look like they are working out. Not that I really care about anyone's approval...but it is nice to hear, and have the positive vibe. Take care all... ilmw
Missy27 Posted November 26, 2007 Posted November 26, 2007 Like Gunny said before ~ the best chance at happiness you have is with your first wife and the mother of your children ~ Good on yer ILMW ~
Ladyjane14 Posted November 26, 2007 Posted November 26, 2007 As for an up date.... things are going great... we are going to social events as a couple again... mainly my work. Everyone I know of has approached me.. and has said how happy they are things look like they are working out. Not that I really care about anyone's approval...but it is nice to hear, and have the positive vibe. Gosh it's nice to see some good news in here. I just love it when this thread gets bumped up these days. It sounds like you two are taking your time. I bet the kids are real excited. Mom and Dad dating again and the holidays approaching. Man, that's some good stuff.
sumdude Posted November 26, 2007 Posted November 26, 2007 Hey bud! Just caught up with my own thread... Yah know... apparently bars are a lousy place to meet woman in the first place.... LOL There are loads of places you can meet members of the opposite sex... just look at Dgiirl... she met some guys through her photography interests... perfect example of how to meet folks.... and there is less pressure to "pick up"... and there tends to be less... or no booze to cloud your judgement... When you no longer give a damn about being with another person... that is the time to be with someone.... Trust me on that one... As for an up date.... things are going great... we are going to social events as a couple again... mainly my work. Everyone I know of has approached me.. and has said how happy they are things look like they are working out. Not that I really care about anyone's approval...but it is nice to hear, and have the positive vibe. Take care all... ilmw Fingers firmly crossed
PWSX3 Posted November 27, 2007 Posted November 27, 2007 It sure is good to hear two sides of a relationship working towards the same goal.....:love: Really good to hear things are still on the positive side of things & that it is going well. You both will enjoy spending these holidays as a family & that is really cool.
Gunny376 Posted November 27, 2007 Posted November 27, 2007 "Its hard to find someone that loves your ass! I mean that REALLY LOVES YOU!!!!! And, remeber? When you do?!!! DON'T F**K IT UP!" The Late but Great Richard Pryor :laugh: Just wanted to give you a little something to print off and carry around in your wallet to remind your Happy Azz from time to time!!! On second thought? Maybe you should print one off and put it on the refrigerator, the bathroom mirror, the dresser mirror, the rearview mirror,........... Glad to hear you and the Misses are still getting stronger and better with each passing day! :love: Happy "Bottling Day" or is it "Boxing Day? (All too happy to bump this one back up top!)
Author ilmw Posted November 28, 2007 Author Posted November 28, 2007 :laugh: Just wanted to give you a little something to print off and carry around in your wallet to remind your Happy Azz from time to time!!! On second thought? Maybe you should print one off and put it on the refrigerator, the bathroom mirror, the dresser mirror, the rearview mirror,........... Glad to hear you and the Misses are still getting stronger and better with each passing day! :love: Happy "Bottling Day" or is it "Boxing Day? (All too happy to bump this one back up top!) Bottling Day.....:lmao::lmao::lmao:!!! Not done that for... well since I lived in Gemany ... a few years back now... That was probably my worst christmans ever... ! Mmmmm rum and cigs for christmans breakfast Ohhh.... the life of a British Soldier stationed overseas :laugh:. Hmmm... I remind myself everyday... when I take that moment to smell the roses... how truly lucky I am... I have another chance with my relationship.. I know what (I) did wrong... how (I) let my part down.. I know what it is I want... and it (she) looks back at me with the same smile on her face... I know who I almost lost for ever... my friend and most importantly my wife... it was a close one. I know ... there are so many men and ladies on here hurting right now.... I was where you were not that long ago. This is one of the main reasons I still come on LS.... to see where I came from, and remind myself... I do not want to be here looking for help... but instead... maybe give it instead. On a different note: Thanks everyone...for all the kinds words.... and stuff. Yeah.... things are still going strong... and yes the boys are happy. DW just mentioned today.. how she has really noticed the difference in both of them... they finally look relaxed, and content. I noticed this too. This seperation stuff is terrible... and it really takes its toll. Not on just the adults directly involved... but their kids... and families.... there is a blanket effect. Now... that this blanket has been removed from our relationship... it appears how happy everyone I know, is... that we are together again. It just blows my mind... how many people.. were effected by this.... and how truly happy they are we are a couple again.... My DW and one of my work buddie's wife were good friends ... but stopped talking when we seperated.... they both felt uncomfortable to speak with each other... due to my friendship with her husband. They had a big girly cry fest the other day at their place, when we went over for dinner. They were so happy to see each other again.... It was sweet This is going to be a great Christmas.... a hell of a lot better than last year, and, I am more excited than I have been in years. I am actually not even fazed that DW wants to put up her decorations this weekend... (her family are Christmans crazy ) Thats cool... I actually am feeling very festive already Well better scooot.. gotta do some stuff, before I get s6 from school Ta Ta for now ilmw
CryingCanuck Posted November 30, 2007 Posted November 30, 2007 Not just lovely but wonderful and terrific and all those other gushy words. I can't tell you how happy I am that things are workign out so well. Tell me soemthing "I" Are you two thinking of going into couselling? The reason I ask buddy is I remember the frist time my EX left, we did have issued that neede help with, so you guys might want to look into that. Just a suggestion, buddy :-) As for Christmas, I know the feelign my friend, actually I'm looking forward to it this year more than I have in years Guess we try to make up for lost time, I knwo I'm doing it more for the boys than for me but also for my new friend, she's a Christmas girl too. Keep up the great work I and let's keep hearing all those good things until you're so bored with us here :-) CC
Author ilmw Posted December 3, 2007 Author Posted December 3, 2007 Not just lovely but wonderful and terrific and all those other gushy words. I can't tell you how happy I am that things are workign out so well. Tell me soemthing "I" Are you two thinking of going into couselling? The reason I ask buddy is I remember the frist time my EX left, we did have issued that neede help with, so you guys might want to look into that. Just a suggestion, buddy :-) As for Christmas, I know the feelign my friend, actually I'm looking forward to it this year more than I have in years Guess we try to make up for lost time, I knwo I'm doing it more for the boys than for me but also for my new friend, she's a Christmas girl too. Keep up the great work I and let's keep hearing all those good things until you're so bored with us here :-) CC Hey CC, Good to here from you As for the counselling.. not as yet... we have taken this pretty slow... getting the feel for each other... and it has been fantastic. She went to individual councelling to work out some of her issues, as did I. Also... she has been reading some of my relationship books... and has discussed with me... some of the things mentioned in them... The big difference between us now.. compared to before. We actually sit down and talk with each other.. and now.. I know how to listen to her. I do think, I am a bit a head of her on some of this.. just because... I have read probably a foot thick worth of material on relationships, separation, etc... and being on here for over a year and a bit... reading.. and discussing this stuff... well... anyone can form the opinion that... as with anyone else who had read... and discussed this subject for so long.. might have some actual knowledge... and valid points. It is actually really nice to finally have some emotional intelligence! All in all... things are going great... and I am so looking forward to christmas... actually don't have to work it this year... Yeeaaahh!! CC.... glad to hear your friend.. likes Christmas... maybe she will give you a speacial present for xmas... (Hmmm should I have PM'd that):lmao: Take care buddy!! ilmw
hopeful26 Posted December 4, 2007 Posted December 4, 2007 Wow, I can't tell you how I happy I am for you! After reading all the horrible things people go through on here it really makes me smile to read one like this. Good for you!
Author ilmw Posted December 5, 2007 Author Posted December 5, 2007 Wow, I can't tell you how I happy I am for you! After reading all the horrible things people go through on here it really makes me smile to read one like this. Good for you! Thank you very much hopeful
tinktronik Posted December 5, 2007 Posted December 5, 2007 Im so glad for this news (from pg 1). I hope your date goes well and that you keep your head and heart about you .
Author ilmw Posted December 7, 2007 Author Posted December 7, 2007 Im so glad for this news (from pg 1). I hope your date goes well and that you keep your head and heart about you . Well, my date did go well, as have all the other ones... as for my head and heart. Not to worry... I finally have a clear head when it comes to woman... I wan't to be with my wife... not because I NEEEEEEEEEEEEED her... I wan't to be with her... because I like being around her... we make each other laugh... and we can talk... with out a pause... about anything... it is kinda like an episode of Seinfeld... we just talk... This probably the first time in my life... It actually feels right.... with nothing niggiling in the back of my head. Also... we take it one day at a time... and this is so nice... as we feel no pressure... niether of us is going anywhere... we are still married... so no rush... no pressure.... just enjoying each other's company... ilmw
Author ilmw Posted December 7, 2007 Author Posted December 7, 2007 Im so glad for this news (from pg 1). I hope your date goes well and that you keep your head and heart about you . Well, my date did go well, as have all the other ones... as for my head and heart. Not to worry... I finally have a clear head when it comes to woman... I wan't to be with my wife... not because I NEEEEEEEEEEEEED her... I wan't to be with her... because I like being around her... we make each other laugh... and we can talk... with out a pause... about anything... it is kinda like an episode of Seinfeld... we just talk... This probably the first time in my life... It actually feels right.... with nothing niggiling in the back of my head. Also... we take it one day at a time... and this is so nice... as we feel no pressure... niether of us is going anywhere... we are still married... so no rush... no pressure.... just enjoying each other's company... ilmw
Antha Posted December 13, 2007 Posted December 13, 2007 Wow! I just read 7 pages in a row of this thread. I'm so truly happy for you, ilmw! If there was an icon for a happy dance, I'd post it. I was rooting for you ever since I followed your first post (and that was LONG ) Congratulations on everything, from becoming who you are today to your reconciliation with your wife. I couldn't stop smiling while I read this thread and thinking "YAY! YAY! YAY" in my head. Awesome news!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Author ilmw Posted December 14, 2007 Author Posted December 14, 2007 Wow! I just read 7 pages in a row of this thread. I'm so truly happy for you, ilmw! If there was an icon for a happy dance, I'd post it. I was rooting for you ever since I followed your first post (and that was LONG ) Congratulations on everything, from becoming who you are today to your reconciliation with your wife. I couldn't stop smiling while I read this thread and thinking "YAY! YAY! YAY" in my head. Awesome news!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Antha!!!! Great to hear from you!! Thanks for the positive carma! How goes things with you??
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