Author confusedaboutmylove Posted October 12, 2007 Author Posted October 12, 2007 Good for you.. You seem like a nice, and concerned woman who really has herself focused properly.. A-C, I am a nice woman... and don't deserve to be sworn at! will definately let you know how the session goes on Monday. Thanks for your words.
Author confusedaboutmylove Posted December 12, 2007 Author Posted December 12, 2007 well, he went overseas, and miraculously (really) he hasn't sworn at me since. But I am still not happy in this relationship and I don't know why. We are about to go on a trip together for a month, so I'm sure I'll feel better during that, but sometimes I just feel like I married an arse. I guess I had illusions/delusions of feeling close to the man you married... him being your best friend, and you being safe, uplifted, etc in his company. Instead, what I feel when I'm around him is inadequate and judged... there is always something wrong with me. He also just makes life difficult. For example, I wanted to plan a dinner with my parents before we go overseas, but this was all too difficult for him to fit into the schedule, despite him having 3 christmas work dinner functions he had on in the past week, and hence enjoying himself. It makes me sad and stressed that whenever my parents are involved, who I happen to really enjoy, he makes a fuss. And when we do all get together, he disengages... sigh. I actually hate being married and fantasize about leaving him on a daily basis. But I never do, or even attempt to make plans, and i wonder why. Am I scared of leaving, or deep down inside do I really not want to leave? I guess, presently, I just feel like I don't like him. And I really wished I liked my husband. that's enough venting. any suggestions?
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