hot123 Posted October 8, 2007 Posted October 8, 2007 Is it true in all cases that sex after a break up is a bad idea?I am climbing the walls and dont want to sleep w/some random man just because...urgh!
oppath Posted October 8, 2007 Posted October 8, 2007 No one can predict the future. For me, it is a bad idea, and I'm a dude. I know it will only delay me moving on. But I'm also the type of guy who, if a girl I hurt offered me her va-jay-jay on a silver platter, would say "no. I don't want to risk hurting you." I'm not going to let someone **** me while they date other people or search for someone else. I'd rather have sex with a random person than someone who walked away from this ****
niceguy27 Posted October 8, 2007 Posted October 8, 2007 Dont do it. I pondered over it for a while with my ex. We had an amazing sex life. But after much thought it would of been a lot harder for me to cope with it. I would of just wanted her back even more. Why would you want to sleep with a random person anyway? I have not been with anyone since we split over a month ago. I'm not ready to open up again with someone new yet. Unless you guys have no chance of getting back together and you just dont care go for it. Your both adults
Bosiell Posted October 8, 2007 Posted October 8, 2007 I assume you dont mean sex with ur ex? If not then why do feel the need to have sex at all? Apart from the obvious Personally speaking I still can not imagine sex with anyone else for sometime yet, I would only be thinking of her and would quite hollow for me.
ijustwannago Posted October 8, 2007 Posted October 8, 2007 it's just going to be a big step backwards. are you in NC?
Author hot123 Posted October 8, 2007 Author Posted October 8, 2007 it's just going to be a big step backwards. are you in NC? for the most part yes...but we have bills and things so not 100%nc
Newtotheblogthing Posted October 8, 2007 Posted October 8, 2007 From my experience yes, bad. It gave me fasle hope. I thought it meant something. All it meant was that I was making myself available and giving myself to someone who no longer wanted to be in a relationship with me. We were together 3 years and broke up 4/5 months ago. I was making myself a doormat and letting him do whatever he wanted. He also has a new girlfriend so I thought that it meant he was unsure and that cheating on her with me meant he still loved me. Sick thinking...and NOT true. Definately a huge step backwards. Paying for it now.
Sanslatete Posted October 8, 2007 Posted October 8, 2007 The last time I was with my ex in that situation it was so cold and emotionless (for her, not me). We used to have an amazing sex life, but the last time will stick with me forever. It was like making love with a doll (as far as I can imagine), no passion and no feeling, it was horrible, and very sad.
Mustang Sally Posted October 8, 2007 Posted October 8, 2007 My advice? Don't go there. Either get a new toy, or find a new man...
Feelgood Posted October 9, 2007 Posted October 9, 2007 Don't do it! Iv been split with my ex for 4 months now and have been sleeping with him on and off since day 1. All it does is gives u false hope and leaves you walking away feeling bitter about the whole situation and delays the healing process. It will never work as a tool to 'win' them back, if anythin it will do the opposite and push them away further. I think many people who crave sex after a break up are actually craving the closeness and intimacy of the relationship but confuse it with the actual physical act. Everyones different but if this is the case then having a random 1 night stand will probably make you feel worse and will make you miss your ex more. As hard as it is you've just gotta ride through it and know that time will heal all. You will know when you feel ready to sleep with someone else. Thats what im trying to tell myself anyway!
Art_Critic Posted October 9, 2007 Posted October 9, 2007 You would be better off finding a transitional person to date than go back to a FWB with the ex.. or use the shower massager a bunch
CaliGuy Posted October 9, 2007 Posted October 9, 2007 Sex with the ex, a great way to prolong your pain and healing, lose all self-respect and confidence and reward your ex for dumping you. If that's what you're trying to accomplish, go ahead and sleep with him.
FooledOnce Posted October 9, 2007 Posted October 9, 2007 I'm pretty sure i want to have sex with my ex. It's been 4 weeks here! I don't think it would be that big of a deal, i mean, it's just sex right? We've done it tons of times. Whether we have sex 512 times or 513 times shouldn't make it any harder to get over her.
datingmum Posted October 9, 2007 Posted October 9, 2007 *bullsh*T* cough cough Joking aside, it DOES make it harder! If one of you is sitting there, pouring your emotions into that person, holding them, smelling them, staring into their eyes and the other is just having convenient sex, then it can be a very painful, awful, disheartening and depressing feeling. I've been on both sides of the street as well. Strangely, when I left my husband years ago, there was one night months later that we ended up sleeping together again. I thought it was no big deal, I left him, right? But in the end, the next morning, I felt as if I never wanted to do that again. He began to build false hopes and he felt terrible and so did I. But literally, I just woke up the next morning and felt "hmmm, I don't ever want to do that again." Don't get me wrong, I was still physically attracted to him, that doesn't go away, but I just had no desire to mate with him anymore. Also, my desire to never hurt him again in that way played a huge factor.
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