Can't Seem to get over the thought of you

[TekKaman_HaLo]

Hey all,

I wrote a little while back about my girlfriend breakin up with me, and I got some really good advice and I've taken it to heart, but over the past couple months I can't stop thinking about her daily and I don't know why. It's been almost 3 months since we broke up, and I realize that she obviously isn't right for me for the reasons she broke up with me, and she even told me she didn't care about me anymore, but yet, I can't wake up in the morning without the thought of her entering my mind followed by a wave of sadness and hurt. Whenever I'm around friends or at work I get my mind off of it, but when my mind is just idle she's just all I think about. I just don't know why I still think of her and hurt over her even though I know shes no good. I havn't had much luck on the dating scene since then so I've been trying to get back in touch with myself and build some confidence in my own abilities rather than work on a relationship right now. 2 weeks after we'd been broken up she had a new guy she became "friends" with. But I'm sure its more than that now, I havnt even heard from the girl in over a month. Has anyone had a similar experience? I mean, would it take more time for me to fully heal or am I just being anal retentive about it? Your thoughts are much appreciated.

 

Tek

[job]

My girlfriend broke up with me about 6months ago and I know we are totally wrong for each other, but I can't get her off my mind either. Every mutha bleepin' thing I do, she' in my head. I can't even escape it when I'm around friends. It hurts!!

 

I do have this to say though, and it may be of some help. I keep reminding myself that I have gone through this before and while I hurt like hell right now, I know IT'S A FACT that it will get better. You will survive and one day you'll look back and think to yourself, "wow, I can't believe that ever even happened". You just have to be patient and let nature run it's coarse. An emotional would is much like physical wound. IT WILL GET BETTER. I have to tell myself that as well, but I know it's true.

 

HANG IN THERE!

[Leikela]

[color=indigo]

It is normal to think about and pine over the loss of a loved one. If you think about it, you were the ones that were dumped, so of course you are going to dwell on things a bit longer then your ex's. They made their decision to end the realtionship and move on. You had that decision made for you which makes it harder to cope with.

 

You will heal over time and when you meet the person that you were meant to be with, you'll wonder what you ever saw in your previous girlfriend. It is having experiences like these which makes up appreciate future loved ones more.

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[moimeme]

You could try the method people are supposed to use to quit negative self-talk. That is, to tell yourself 'STOP' as soon as you notice that you are thinking about her again and deliberately distract yourself somehow. Go do some work that needs thought (pay bills, maybe) or call a pal or watch some sort of absorbing TV show.

[ET]

Hey dude I know where you're coming from. Me and my GF broke up a little over a month ago. When I am sitting around I can't stop thinking about her. I have found the best thing to do is to workout- it really takes you're mind off things. Best of luck to you- don't worry cause many of us here are experiencing the same thing.

[TekKaman_HaLo]

Thanks all, I really appreciate the advice, and I'm here to help you all if as best I can too, we'll make it through this! Best of luck to everyone

[ET]

Just wanted to add more

 

Tekkaman- I was with my ex for 3 1/2 yrs and I was just like you- I had planned on the exact day I was going to give my ex a promise ring. However, her feelings had drifted from me because I wasn't giving her the love she deserved.

 

I read your other post and I would have to tell you that something else was going on behind the scenes. I am not saying that she was with another guy, but she might have been thinking about it. Anyway, don't stress on it - you are only going to make yourself sick and feel worse. I felt a month ago that I was going to have an ulcer- all the stress from worrying but I realize that even though I do think about her still, I know that there is a reason for everything.

 

I don't know if you are trying to be friends with you're ex- I was on good terms with my ex but for the last week we haven't talked. I look at it like if she wants to be friends then she will call me. Sometimes people just need to break it off for awhile and then come back as friends once things settle down.

 

Lastly, you will have to realize that you're ex will be with someone else. It hurts thinking about you're ex kissing someone else or being intimate with someone else. I wish for my ex to be happy- if it's being with me or someone else.

 

Anyway, it might take some time to fully heal but use this time to work on yourself and to have a good time. I know it is sometimes difficult to not have someone there, but you will eventually find your way. Good luck!