Jmina Posted October 5, 2007 Posted October 5, 2007 This is how i torture myself...when i cry and cry that shes gone seemingly forever. "I will never forget the moment we shared, entwined in each others bodies. I will never forget that black wollen knitted cardigan she wore that was so soft and gentle against my head resting on her. The scent of her clothes, and the sent of her hair. I was then truly floating on cload 9. What a ride! How great love is! if i wasn't so truly content, warm, protected and loved in our embrace i would have jumped up and down for joy with the elation and love that i had just oozing out of me. i would look up and see her perfect face, her eyes closed, i put my head back where it was on her arm and i fell asleep" SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOB :'( now i need to take some of my own advice.. i always, ALWAYS make sure i lift myself up again. i will be able to have that with someone else...she wasnt some magical being that is the only one to make me feel loved, nurtured, etc.. (at least i hope not) I am lucky for the time that i had, now after reminicing i will leave it at that and look at myself. how wonderful and big my heart is! the love that i am capable of is astounding. I cant wait to share it with the one who deserves it. i am so full of emotion happy and sad, elation and gratitude, saddness and grief. Jmina
Spinderella Posted October 5, 2007 Posted October 5, 2007 Thats a good way to look at things, feeling grateful for your capacity to love so much, and in this way directing the love to yourself aswell.
Sanslatete Posted October 5, 2007 Posted October 5, 2007 I suppose it is comforting to think of these things when you get past the grieving stage. But if I were to think of my ex in that lovey-dovey way now, it would just remind me of what I miss so much. It's a few more months down the line for me I think, got to get through Christmas without her too.
Author Jmina Posted October 6, 2007 Author Posted October 6, 2007 Yes it is comforting, but it doesnt mean i dont struggle at other times. i have to get by xmas without my too, and my birthday. i have to lift myself up though when it gets too hard and when ive had enough of feeling like there is no hope. Jmina
SuperHands Posted October 6, 2007 Posted October 6, 2007 You've described pretty much the one moment in my life where I could say 'I truly am happy'. I can see it so vividly even 2 months on. It doesnt ache as much and I am so happy that I had that experience and more importantly am looking forward to the time when I have that experience with the one i truly will spend the rest of my life together with. Now I Just imagine these kind of moments with someone new. They are just fantasies yes, but dreaming is what focus' your mind and a focused mind is happy.
loveinlife Posted October 6, 2007 Posted October 6, 2007 This is how i torture myself...when i cry and cry that shes gone seemingly forever. "I will never forget the moment we shared, entwined in each others bodies. I will never forget that black wollen knitted cardigan she wore that was so soft and gentle against my head resting on her. The scent of her clothes, and the sent of her hair. I was then truly floating on cload 9. What a ride! How great love is! if i wasn't so truly content, warm, protected and loved in our embrace i would have jumped up and down for joy with the elation and love that i had just oozing out of me. i would look up and see her perfect face, her eyes closed, i put my head back where it was on her arm and i fell asleep" SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOB :'( now i need to take some of my own advice.. i always, ALWAYS make sure i lift myself up again. i will be able to have that with someone else...she wasnt some magical being that is the only one to make me feel loved, nurtured, etc.. (at least i hope not) I am lucky for the time that i had, now after reminicing i will leave it at that and look at myself. how wonderful and big my heart is! the love that i am capable of is astounding. I cant wait to share it with the one who deserves it. i am so full of emotion happy and sad, elation and gratitude, saddness and grief. Jmina Good job Jmina, im on the brinks of recovery as well, im not sure if anyone is suitable for me except myself right now, atleast i haven't met any or have given myself a chance due to my past fear and vulnerabilities. But i believe i am improving and to think that it was my exgf who can give me those joys is fault for not taking advantage of life for my own happiness. Since i am aware of my self content will be able to move on with my life and into the next relationship. gluck on your future love life Jmina! =)
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