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Posted

My ex called again from a random phone number to ask me for a friend's #. I didnt know it was her and i was feelin ok and all of a sudden my stomach plummets and i get all light headed. She sounds calm and collected and is so nice it kills me. Just for the simple fact that it comes off as, "what's the big deal?" why cant you just get over it and conversate with me?" I really wish I could, I'll just want to start asking questions that I probably dont want to hear the answers to or I'll get no response. Even if I dont ask the questions I'll be thinking them and that will cloud our convo.

 

I play music and she asked me about my shows....and I want to keep talking, but I know it's just gonna suck me back into not getting over her.

 

I know one day I'll meet someone that cares for me and I'll be sane/happy again, but I worry that if I cut her off I will never know her after I'm healed. she is an incredible person and I have cut off ex gfs in the past. never really thought much about it until this break up came along. i dont know if that was a healthy way to end stuff.

 

i want to call her right now, i just dont know what to do. fighting myself endlessly over this.

Posted
I worry that if I cut her off I will never know her after I'm healed.

 

by then you may not even care. you'd be surprised.

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