Divine Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 I really believe my ex took my ability to love, its been almost 2 years for me, and i have not been able to maintain or commit myself to someone, because i fear i will be hurt again, my ex really did a number on me. I just dont want to be hurt ever, ever, ever again, i have been down a rough, dark, horrable road, and i just cannot go back there. Is there help for me?, will i be able to give my heart to someone like that again?
loveinlife Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 I really believe my ex took my ability to love, its been almost 2 years for me, and i have not been able to maintain or commit myself to someone, because i fear i will be hurt again, my ex really did a number on me. I just dont want to be hurt ever, ever, ever again, i have been down a rough, dark, horrable road, and i just cannot go back there. Is there help for me?, will i be able to give my heart to someone like that again? I have heard of ppl saying there are different kinds of love in relationships. The new one will not be like the old one. I too have not experienced that yet bc like you its been a long time for me since my broken heart has mended enough to love someone else. Im sure there will be other loves, just takes time for the right person to come. It may not be today, next week, or in a few months, but im sure when we are ready with the right individual, we will find love again. gluck buttercup!
LoveDeluxe78 Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 I really believe my ex took my ability to love, its been almost 2 years for me, and i have not been able to maintain or commit myself to someone, because i fear i will be hurt again, my ex really did a number on me. I just dont want to be hurt ever, ever, ever again, i have been down a rough, dark, horrable road, and i just cannot go back there. Is there help for me?, will i be able to give my heart to someone like that again? I am sure you'll be able to love again when you meet the right person. I do understand how you're feeling though! This last relationship has been so traumatizing and left such a bad taste in my mouth that the last thing I'm thinking about right now is meeting guys. Wherever I go, guys are always coming up to me and trying to talk to me, or friends of friends are always asking them to hook them up with me, but I am just not interested. Some people say the best way to get over a person is to date or get with another, but I just can't seem to like anyone, and in addition, I just don't want to deal with the pain like this again.
Jmina Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 You have closed your heart by having unbalanced thoughts. im not saying your crazy or anything!! if you focus on 'i will never find love, i am not good enough, im destined to be alone' that is being unbalanced. there are two sides to love. one being - support the other being - challange. think of a time when someone made you upset and angry. who was it? when was it? now remember who at that exact time was supporting you, lifting you up or putting you on a pedestal. you cant have one without the other. noone can. love will reach you, noone can escape from it. whether it is -support or challange. This is what we have to strive to understand. and when we understand it we will actualyl see that love is all around. in those two forms. dont get angry at it, upset from it. just accept it. the world can never live with just support, and it can never live with just challange, both are there to keep it balanced. if you can get this then the next time you are criticised maybe it is a chance to bring you back down to earth, maybe they have a point, there will be truth in it somewhere whether their words have truth or their actions are balancing you again, no matter what they are saying. Your ex did not take your ability to love again. your ex walked away so someone who can love you as much as you love them can come into your life. your ex didnt give you the thoughts that you have. you give yourself the thoughts that you have. there is no way your ex can make you feel the way you are feeling. the good part is that because you were the one to close your heart then you have the ability to open it again. if you stopped anything good coming into your mind, anything benefical for your healing (which is exactly what you have done,we all have) then you can also stop anything negative running your mind - running your life. if you belive you will never find love again then you wont. if you are willing to open your heart then you will. and you will also find love. opening your heart can sound kind of scary or intimidating. but it all happens in the mind. be thankful for any pain you have because im sure it has given you many lessons. you can use it to grow. dont be bitter against your ex or resent them. everyone does the best they can do at any given time. and everyone will do what they have to do. if you were in a relationship where you werent happy you would leave too. if you really love your ex then you will be happy in someway that they are happy. that is living with an open heart. you are no where near ready for being in another relationship yet. and it has nothing to do with time. it has everything to do with how you have dealt with your pain. open your heart. be thankful for what you have learnt, remember the good times and leave it at that. if you have loved unconditionally then you can do it again. you know what you are capable of. wake up, stop feeling sorry for yourself. take control of your own thoughts because noone else will. dont find yourself looking back on your life in 20 years time to be disapointed and regretful. your ****ing alive. you could be so happy. happiness is a way of living not a destination. jmina
sao2 Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 I have felt that way to. Eventually it came back. Now I am heartbroken again. I even had a relationship with someone for 2 years while I felt that way. Love is different every time. Every time it will feel different than the last time. Maybe what you miss is the feeling he gave you of being on edge.
funkybassplayer Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 Learn to love yourself again, then you will be able to find a true reltionship where you will both give to each other. At the moment, your just not ready to love again, you need your love reserves for you, and to heal and move forward. When you are ready, you will know it in your heart, and you will attract the right person. Be kind to yourself, and dont be afraid to feel your emotions.
dbtmarley Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 Learn to love yourself again, then you will be able to find a true reltionship where you will both give to each other. At the moment, your just not ready to love again, you need your love reserves for you, and to heal and move forward. When you are ready, you will know it in your heart, and you will attract the right person. Be kind to yourself, and dont be afraid to feel your emotions. Excellent advice.
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