carolinaboy Posted October 3, 2007 Posted October 3, 2007 I have been posting on here off and on about the difficulties of maintaining friendship with my ex of 2 1/2 years since we broke up 2 mos. ago. She is dating our old roomie, who I dislike immensely besides the situation. She's called and tried to let me know she wants to hang out and be friends. We used to play pool at a pool hall near our old place and she mentioned wanting to do that sometime. The new guy she's dating lives in California now, so I won't have to see them together. I'm sure he'll come up in one form or another. We know a lot of the same people, so I hear his name all the time. I really want to be her friend. I just have feelings of confusion, sadness, jealousy and fear about seeing her from a new platonic angle. I dont know when these feelings will fade, but I wish she was in my life. I imposed the NC out of resentment and just the obvious fact that I wouldnt be able to move on if she was around all the time. I'm worried that I will want to kiss her or be affectionate and just feel like a fool if I see her though. I guess I'm asking you all out there if you think this is a good idea? If there are any guidelines to consider so I don't find myself feeling worse off? Physically I'm still attracted to her, emotionally I am as well but realize this relationship wont work romantically, at least not as far as I can see. I'm bummed out that I'm realizing all of these truths and things about myself that I wish she could have seen. I know thats in hindsight. Either way, thoughts?
hopeforlove243 Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 I would say not to hang out with her till you don't have any feelings for her. My ex-bf dumped me 2 months ago, well, he told me he needed space, the next thing I know, he was seeing other woman. Yet, he insists that he wants to be friends, wants to hang out with me, cause he misses me, misses doing fun things with me. I tried NC several times, but none lasts. I did know from my experience that hanging out with him is a mistake, cause I still love him, want him back as my bf, I can't move on while hang out with him, just like a friend said, you can't find the right person for u while you still hang out with your ex, not mentioning that you still have feeling for your ex. So, say no to her.
too old for this Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 I have to agree. If she is with someone else and you still have feelings for her you are only torturing yourself. If you're not over her seeing her and hanging out again will set you back more. Just think how miserable you are now thinking about it, you'll be even more miserable after you see her. If your having this much doubt about how you're going to feel about seeing her, I'd just skip it and move on.
Recommended Posts