Diplok Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 Why do I punish myself like this. I can't get over my ex even though she has made no attempt to contact me. It's been 2 months and not even a smoke signal from her. Sometimes I feel I'm getting better but for some reason last night I just cried before going to bed. Yeah, I admit it, I cried. I miss her. I'm seriously thinking of trying to give her one last call but part of me tells me not to, she won't pick up, she does not care. I don't know what to do. I have no control over my thoughts and it's seriously bothering me. I want her off my mind and I can't seem to do it.
Mandy5 Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 Diplok...I feel your pain, im going through the exact same thing, as im sure lots of others are as well. Its so hard to not want to contact our ex's, but we know deep down inside that its for the best that we don't contact them. I find it so hard when im about to go to bed, or when i wake up in the morning, but i always come on this site and it reminds me that im not alone, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Dont worry one day you wont even think about her anymore, and you will be with somone 100 times better:) Im trying to tell myself the same thing..My ex is with another girl already, and told me never to talk to him again..and it sucks!, but i know one day i will be okay with it. It just takes time...which is the sucky part.. anways feel better:) you will start to slowly forget just keep yourself busy and try and be with friends a lot, thats what i try and do, because when im by myself alli do is think of my ex.
Art_Critic Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 she does not care. Remember the part I quoted from your OP. Sometimes keeping it real is the only way to go
Bosiell Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 I blows for sure. About a month for me. I just cannot stop thinking of her. Would do anything to go back in time. My head tells me dont be such a soft bstard, move on!. But my heart will just not let go. I know the chances of her contacting me are slim to none, she probably doesnt even think about me anymore, moved on etc, but that ever so unprobable phone or text is all I ever seem to think about, regardless of what I am doing. Think this is gonna take more time than I thought to sort my head and heart out. I will get there tho. As long as I am positve and keep believing.
Sanslatete Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 I know the feeling too well. I try to busy myself all day, but there is always a little gremlin on my shoulder just waiting to remind me to think of her. It hurts like a bastard to go through all this turmoil and pain and know that she isn't even bothered. I think of things I hadn't done for years and everywhere and everything has the potential to remind me of something we did together or something she said. I can't listen to most of my music or watch anything on TV, there are too many memories. What makes it worse is that I spend a lot of time in the town where we used to hang out a lot and that really tugs at my heart-strings. I see her everywhere and in everyone, it's a bit obsessive I know, but I adored her and thought we were for keeps. I'm in the third month of this agonising break up and hoping this will start to fade soon, it's more than a bit much, I'm starting to worry about myself, she's not worth all this attention.
Lance Taylor Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 I feel for all of you guys because ive been there. And there really is nothing anyone else can say to make it better, but I will tell you what has helped at least speed the recovery process up for me. Dont think about the memories that you have together. This only makes things worse. Think about the things that you didnt like about her. I know breakups tend to make people seem like "the one" in retrospect, but I guarantee you there were several things she did while you were together that you didnt like. Focus on them and imagine finding someone that is even better for you, because you can! Dont think about what you are missing with her, think about what you get to do now that you are single. Now the good new/bad news is that the same things that help you get over her are the same things that can possibly make her want you back. So start dating other people as soon as you can. I cant emphasize this enough. Go out tonight and hit on girls, regardless if you feel like it or not. I know you probably have that "I dont want other girls" feeling, but you have to fight through it. Not only will this take your mind off of your ex, it will make her jealous and most importantly (in my experience) it will allow you to find someone that is even better than your ex. Hope this helps!
Grace112 Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 My friend said something to me that has kept me from calling for 5 weeks now. "If you call him, he'll think you're pathetic". And you know what? I honestly believe that it's true in my case. He's already told me he wants nothing to do with me. He hasn't made any effort to contact me. He already has a new girlfriend that he brags about. What would that say about me if I called? If you think that she won't pick up, do you want to put yourself through that pain? You're hurting now - calling her could cause you even more grief. Be a caretaker of your heart and try not to inflict any more pain on yourself. Stay strong.
Bosiell Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 >Lance Thanks for the advice. I know what you mean concerning trying to focus on the negative points to an ex instead of the postive. Problem for me is that she really didnt have many, so wish she did, wouldve made it so much easier for me. At least she hasnt while Ive still got these damn rose tinted glasses on. As for the hitting on girls. Hmm you could be right there. I did intend to stay pretty much well clear of any contact with them for a while, but now I am thinking what the hell! Although a few rejections at this time would not help at all.
Amy12345678 Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 it's only been a little over 2 weeks for me, but i'm in love with 2 people (i know, i know...alot of people won't believe this, i didn't until it happened to me) my boyfriend knows i still love my ex even though it's been 3 years and he knows i love him too, and he knows it hurts me and that's why i've cut him out, but i can't tell him that i sometimes sit and stare at me phone for hours willing it to ring, or that although i've deleted all my ex's numbers i still know them by heart i know that if i were to ring my ex he'd pick up, he'd make me laugh, we'd get on, if i asked for a favour, he'd do it (he has done it), if i turned up at his place and asked for a place to stay, he'd let me. It makes it so hard because I know we could have such a good time even as just friends, but i know i'd hurt even more than i do now and in the end i'll hurt my boyfriend, and it's him i want to be with it just sucks that i've lost/lossing a person a love so dearly and i can't talk to my best friend (my boyfriend) about it
Newtotheblogthing Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 Gracie112. Agreeing with you a lot today. It's pretty simple what you wrote: "If you call him, he'll think you're pathetic". god, I have already made myself look that way.. numerous times. Now he just wont respond and maybe I had to kill it so that I could move on. Tough day today.. seems to be really sinking in that he is over the whole situation and he won't be in my life anymore. I feel like I don't have a lot going on right now also which makes things so much harder. I had to put all his photos a disc this weekend but I haven't mailed it off yet.. When I am happy I want to call, when i am sad I want to call.. but I can't anymore. Trying to cope.. It's a roller coaster.. good days, bad days. Depression.. It will lessen with time.. I keep telling myself that..
Sanslatete Posted October 3, 2007 Posted October 3, 2007 I know how you feel, I busy myself most days but I constantly want to contact my ex, who hasn't responded to my texts for a while now. It's so frustrating, I want to kick my own arse for being so weak, but this love thing makes me do all sorts of things I wouldn't do if I were sane and out of love.
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