loveinlife Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 I wish i can be talking to her right now. /sad face
Author loveinlife Posted October 1, 2007 Author Posted October 1, 2007 u can talk to me thanks fabulous, your so nice! the reason why i want to talk to her again is maybe we can rekindle our relationship again, i feel i don't deserve more than i get from her. its my self defeating concept that has prevented me from meeting someone and live more happily. how's your love life?
fabulousgal Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 my love life brings feelings of nausea and the urge to break things why do you say you don't deserve more than you can get from her? explain...
Author loveinlife Posted October 1, 2007 Author Posted October 1, 2007 my love life brings feelings of nausea and the urge to break things why do you say you don't deserve more than you can get from her? explain... she's really pretty, knows what she wants, hard working, conservative, family oriented, knows how to save money, there's a lot of great qualities about her. I haven't met a girl who is like that, i know i have my share of mistakes and well she is not so perfect bc she is sorta like a perfectionist who tells me that im wrong for this and that sometimes, i guess that nurturing principle some ppl have. i think im afraid to open up and get wounded again. i find it hard to trust anyone, even my friends sometimes, so many things changed that im slowly try to find out who i am. I've always been a giver and neglected much of my own needs.
Author loveinlife Posted October 1, 2007 Author Posted October 1, 2007 you get nausea and urge to break things? why is that?
fabulousgal Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 she's really pretty, knows what she wants, hard working, conservative, family oriented, knows how to save money, there's a lot of great qualities about her. Well that's great, but you do deserve someone who can do all this, and even more, whether it be her or someone else. Don't sell yourself short. i think im afraid to open up and get wounded again. i find it hard to trust anyone, even my friends sometimes, so many things changed that im slowly try to find out who i am. I've always been a giver and neglected much of my own needs. This is completely understandable. After my ex ex, I was such a cynical non trusting bia that I snapped at people all the time, and thought everyone was out to get me. I realized it after awhile and began working through the fact that it wasn't my fault for trusting him, it was his fault for not RESPECTING it. Not sure what happened with your ex. I too neglect my needs, and we can't do that to ourselves. When you say things like, you don't deserve more than her....it sounds as if you don't hold your self on a pedestal, which you should . You are a prize too.
Author loveinlife Posted October 1, 2007 Author Posted October 1, 2007 thanks, sounds like we both went through similar situations in our life. I think im at that point like you that its hard for me to trust someone. I've been sorta reserved to how feel towards my friends or ppl i meet, except for my family. they are the best, ppl i can always trust. yes, i have some worth too, lately i've been feeling sorta down, and feel that i don't worth much, bc i think why did she leave me? that kind of negative thought. but i realize that i should give myself some respect and learn to be open to meet my needs. I've always been the nice guy, sometimes i feel i don't meet my own expectation or self worth. thanks for the talk. =) how are you?
fabulousgal Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 lately i've been feeling sorta down, and feel that i don't worth much, bc i think why did she leave me? that kind of negative thought. but i realize that i should give myself some respect and learn to be open to meet my needs yeah that "why did they leave" question will make you doubt everything. i guess unfortunatley the reason is that at this time they are not the right one. maybe later, but there is no sense in banking on that. i have had to go through learning how to accept that it is ok that i have needs too, bc i tend to give and give and be nice. so it is ok that you have them . you just appear to be a selfless giver, and while that is so very nice and sweet, i guess the downside is that you don't have a firm grip of having your own needs/wants met. im alright i suppose, thanks for asking
Author loveinlife Posted October 1, 2007 Author Posted October 1, 2007 yeah that "why did they leave" question will make you doubt everything. i guess unfortunatley the reason is that at this time they are not the right one. maybe later, but there is no sense in banking on that. i have had to go through learning how to accept that it is ok that i have needs too, bc i tend to give and give and be nice. so it is ok that you have them . you just appear to be a selfless giver, and while that is so very nice and sweet, i guess the downside is that you don't have a firm grip of having your own needs/wants met. im alright i suppose, thanks for asking exactly, you see my side really well, *sigh* thanks for the talk tonight. =)
Sanslatete Posted October 1, 2007 Posted October 1, 2007 I miss my ex-GF but she's not the woman I knew any more, she may as well be dead, and kinda is in a way. The woman I loved for over six years wouldn't have treated me like an idiot and made me feel like ****.
Author loveinlife Posted October 2, 2007 Author Posted October 2, 2007 I miss my ex-GF but she's not the woman I knew any more, she may as well be dead, and kinda is in a way. The woman I loved for over six years wouldn't have treated me like an idiot and made me feel like ****. Sorry to hear that San, hope you are doing good. =)
NorCalDave Posted October 2, 2007 Posted October 2, 2007 I miss my ex-GF but she's not the woman I knew any more, she may as well be dead, and kinda is in a way. The woman I loved for over six years wouldn't have treated me like an idiot and made me feel like ****. Exactly how I feel. When I think about my ex when we first met, and then I think about how she was when she was living in my house this summer as my "friend", and how cold and distant she had become, it almost makes it easier to move on. I have thought the same thing, "she may as well be dead"....because she's not the same person I fell in love with. Today, for some reason, I am having one of those days and missing the ex, no matter how cold she was the last couple times I saw her. Something made me think of her today, and it almost took me right back to square one. Must....be....strong......
Sanslatete Posted October 2, 2007 Posted October 2, 2007 I know, I have those days too, too many of them. I think of my ex-GF and of how much she melted my heart. But she did things in the last month of our relationship that I would never have thought har capable of. She was beautiful and kind and very sweet for six years, and then all of a sudden she went evil. I would never have hurt her like she did me, it was almost like she wasn't the same person, I didn't recognise her anymore and it was heartbreaking. I wish it all hadn't happened and I could still love her like I did, but I'm beginning to regret the time we had together because there are so many memories that I can't get out of my head, and they're all poisoned with what she did to me.
NorCalDave Posted October 3, 2007 Posted October 3, 2007 I know, I have those days too, too many of them. I think of my ex-GF and of how much she melted my heart. But she did things in the last month of our relationship that I would never have thought har capable of. She was beautiful and kind and very sweet for six years, and then all of a sudden she went evil. I would never have hurt her like she did me, it was almost like she wasn't the same person, I didn't recognise her anymore and it was heartbreaking. I wish it all hadn't happened and I could still love her like I did, but I'm beginning to regret the time we had together because there are so many memories that I can't get out of my head, and they're all poisoned with what she did to me. OMFG, I feel you. We should do lunch. I still hold so many positive loving memories of her, and I can't seem to shake them. They seem to outweigh all the bad things that happened and the person she became. Little things get me. Like today, two things reminded me of her and the rest of the morning I couldn't get her out of my head. People I saw outside on my walk even reminded me of her. All I have to remember though, is, she changed, she's not that person I first fell in love with, and most importantly, she doesn't love me. Otherwise she wouldn't have left me 3 times.
Sanslatete Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 It is hard to get that through my head though, that she doesn't love me. It all happened so quickly, she loved me until May of this year then it all went ****. I long to see, hear, hold, speak to her all the time and there's virtually nowhere that doesn't remind me of her. Even stupid things remind me like sandwich fillings she liked and cars like the one she drives. It just drives me nuts. I want to get over her, try to remember the bad things, but I've got 6 years of beautiful memories that over-shadow them and just make me miserable. Surely there must be an end to this torture!?
Rooster_DAR Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 I feel you pain, it's really hard to get through all the emotions. It's been well over a year for me and I still have the dreams everynight. Ugggghhhh
Author loveinlife Posted October 4, 2007 Author Posted October 4, 2007 I feel you pain, it's really hard to get through all the emotions. It's been well over a year for me and I still have the dreams everynight. Ugggghhhh Rooster! How you been bro? haven't seen you on ls for awhile. Things been going okay?
LoveDeluxe78 Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 Oh god, I've been feeling the same way! It's been a month, thought I was moving on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tommycapnpants Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 im right there with everyone. its been four months. was getting better, but now it feels worse than ever. do any of you feel like you are not going to get over it at all? no matter how much i try to tell myself, something inside of me screams no. . .you will not get over this.
NorCalDave Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 Boy, we're all struggling huh?? I thought I was doing better too, but this no contact thing is hard. It is straight up some cold ass turkey. A couple days ago I had a big weird flashback. I was at the gym after work, and I noticed my ex's workout bottle that she had left there earlier that day (she's been going to the gym in the day when I am at work so we don't run into each other). I picked it up and now I am holding it in my bag to give back to her if I ever see her again. I didn't know if I should leave it at the front desk for her or not...either way she'd probably think I am just making an excuse to get in contact with her. It's just weird, knowing that everyday she's in the gym right before I am, and I see her things she leaves behind.... Hopefully this will all be over soon because I am trying hard to move to San Francisco...my body, mind and soul are bleeding for a new fresh start.
Author loveinlife Posted October 4, 2007 Author Posted October 4, 2007 Boy, we're all struggling huh?? I thought I was doing better too, but this no contact thing is hard. It is straight up some cold ass turkey. A couple days ago I had a big weird flashback. I was at the gym after work, and I noticed my ex's workout bottle that she had left there earlier that day (she's been going to the gym in the day when I am at work so we don't run into each other). I picked it up and now I am holding it in my bag to give back to her if I ever see her again. I didn't know if I should leave it at the front desk for her or not...either way she'd probably think I am just making an excuse to get in contact with her. It's just weird, knowing that everyday she's in the gym right before I am, and I see her things she leaves behind.... Hopefully this will all be over soon because I am trying hard to move to San Francisco...my body, mind and soul are bleeding for a new fresh start. Looks like it, alot of ppl going through similar similar situations. Maybe the fresh start that you want is going to help you along the way to get your feet back on track again and not remind you of her like the item you found at the gym. best of luck bro! when there is a will, there is a way!
Rooster_DAR Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 Rooster! How you been bro? haven't seen you on ls for awhile. Things been going okay? I've been doing great! Took a break from LS for a while to concentrate on my career and other interests. I didn't want to lurk here to long, I might become some kind of guy who thinks he knows it all.
LoveDeluxe78 Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 I do fine until I drink and for some reason, even though I've deleted his number from my phone and don't really know it, when I'm drunk, I know the number and manage to call him! It's just horrible. I called him two days ago and he was so over everything and so nonchalant, and it made me so upset!!! That's a great reason to give up drinking!!!!
Author loveinlife Posted October 4, 2007 Author Posted October 4, 2007 I've been doing great! Took a break from LS for a while to concentrate on my career and other interests. I didn't want to lurk here to long, I might become some kind of guy who thinks he knows it all. Its great that you are doing so well. I see your point in concentrating on your career and other interests. i hear yah! did you move out of cali? I do fine until I drink and for some reason, even though I've deleted his number from my phone and don't really know it, when I'm drunk, I know the number and manage to call him! It's just horrible. I called him two days ago and he was so over everything and so nonchalant, and it made me so upset!!! That's a great reason to give up drinking!!!! Yeah drinking can make the mind think otherwise and make us do certain things. I also have deleted the number on my cell phone, but the number my ex has is on the back of my head and its hard to not forget it. i made up a program for myself to try not to call my ex, giving myself three months to break the habit and by that time it should be under behavioral control, its like a an addiction that i have to kick. The part that i need to manage is to start this program. hope you guys/girls are having a wonderful day!!
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