CJ77 Posted September 26, 2007 Posted September 26, 2007 My ex boyfriend and I have been separated for 4 mnths now. He broke up with my after i accused him of cheating and him never having time for me, overall we had a very good relationship except for him always being so busy and then me accusing him of cheating. so for the past four months he contacts me at least once a week, we work together and co workers tell me how they catch him looking at me and when i go to look at him BAM hes lookin the other way, if i walk by him and not even look at him he makes sure he gets my attention and says hello to me is he still interested or............
norajane Posted September 26, 2007 Posted September 26, 2007 Yes, he's probably still interested. Why does it matter if he's interested or not? Do you want to get back together with him? Has his schedule changed so he's less busy? Are you still going to accuse him of cheating?
Author CJ77 Posted September 27, 2007 Author Posted September 27, 2007 well norajane to answer your questions i love my ex very much so but towards the end of our relationship i only saw him like once a week or once every two weeks bc he put all his extra cirriculars before me as he always had, then when i found out how he hadnt seen me in over a week but yet went out to a movie with two girls and a guy what am i supposed to think so i was devastated when he split with me as i felt after i cooled down and said i was sry for accusing him of cheating we could have worked out our minor differences and yes i want him back
norajane Posted September 27, 2007 Posted September 27, 2007 You're going to need to resolve those issues before you can start seeing each other again. If his schedule isn't going to change and he will continue prioritizing other activities over you, then you'll end up back in the same place. Why don't you talk to him since he contacts you at least once a week? Just ask him if he's missed being with you and if he'd like to give it another try.
nittygritty Posted September 27, 2007 Posted September 27, 2007 I think he has behaved like many cheaters do when they are caught. Don't beat yourself up for accusing him of cheating when you had a perfectly normal reaction to finding out that your boyfriend, who has been spending little time with you went out with two girls and a buddy to a movie. He had time to go on what appeared like a double date and wasn't willing to make time for you. Who wouldn't get mad about that? Then he dumped you for having a normal reaction to the situation. It sounds like he was guilty. He also sounds controlling. The reality is that what he did was kind of emotionally abusive if you think about it. Your self esteem has taken a harsh blow. Once you realize that this is how he treats women that he is in a relationship with and that his issues have nothing to do with you personally, you will be able to see him more clearly for how he really is. Rather than how he can be at times or how you wish he were. The odds are that even if you two got back together it would be only a short while before he is treating you badly again. He will only get worse each time you go back. I think you should find another job and move on with your life. Work on recovering from this relationship because it has had an unhealthy effect on you and you do deserve better. The answer to the question in your post is yes, he probably is still interested in you.
Author CJ77 Posted September 27, 2007 Author Posted September 27, 2007 Thankyou both for your insight...i also should have mentioned how he has told some of his aqaintences at work about our breakup thinking it wouldnt get back to me but one guy told me how my ex told him how wonderful i was and when the guy said why dont u get her back my ex replied that he didnt think it could work between us, so thats why i dont ask him about a another shot at it, while he was breaking up with me he told me that he hoped in the future for a second chance but for the time it was best for us to split and he said that he still liked me.....but maybe he is controlling and maybe he is a cheater even though he strongly insisted he would never do such a thing...of coarse hes not going to admit to it...he also blames one our coworkers for our split bc as my ex stated the co worker ruined everything when he told me how my ex was at a movie with 2 girls and a guy.....interesting...but thankyou again i really appreciate your insights
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