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question about kissing


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Posted

I am relatively inexperienced with guys, not having dated much. I went out on a first date with a guy recently, and the evening went rather perfect. It was so cute, he really didn't want me to go. Anyway, I've never kissed a guy on a first date before nor have any of the guys I've dated ever tried to kiss me on a first date, so it honestly never occured to me that he might try. At the end of the night, I hugged him goodbye, and after the hug he kissed me. I realized about 0.2 seconds before his lips were on mine what he was about to do, so I had to make a split-second decision, and I decided to relax and enjoy it because this guy had really impressed me that night, and I'm not easily impressed.

 

Anyway, eventually there was tongue. Back to the not having dated much, I've never french kissed, so I kinda froze. He would have his tongue in my mouth for a little bit, then take it out, and I guess I should've reciprocated at this point but I wasn't sure exactly what to do and was generally nervous because I'd never been in this situation before, so he would just put his tongue back in again.

 

So, my question is, what makes a good french kiss? I guess I have some vague ideas, but I don't want to be a bad kisser and I want to be prepared in case I kiss this guy again soon. ;)

Posted
So, my question is, what makes a good french kiss?

Practice.... lots of practice. :)

  • Author
Posted
Practice.... lots of practice. :)

 

Haha... well, yeah... but that doesn't help me now! :p

Posted

I had my first french kiss in the fourth grade! I can't believe you never french kissed someone before, are you making that up???

 

Anyway my advice is keep your mouth big soft moist and yummy and sometimes gently suck on his tongue like you would his dick! ;)

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Posted
I can't believe you never french kissed someone before, are you making that up???

 

Haha, no, I'm not. I've just been really shy most of my life, so I haven't dated much until recently, when I've kind of forced myself to get over it and be more social, so that's why. And I just never french kissed my ex-boyfriend because he would be really pushy about it and it got on my nerves that he was so pushy, so I would get on his nerves back by not doing it. :laugh:

Posted
I am relatively inexperienced with guys, not having dated much. I went out on a first date with a guy recently, and the evening went rather perfect. It was so cute, he really didn't want me to go. Anyway, I've never kissed a guy on a first date before nor have any of the guys I've dated ever tried to kiss me on a first date, so it honestly never occured to me that he might try. At the end of the night, I hugged him goodbye, and after the hug he kissed me. I realized about 0.2 seconds before his lips were on mine what he was about to do, so I had to make a split-second decision, and I decided to relax and enjoy it because this guy had really impressed me that night, and I'm not easily impressed.

 

Anyway, eventually there was tongue. Back to the not having dated much, I've never french kissed, so I kinda froze. He would have his tongue in my mouth for a little bit, then take it out, and I guess I should've reciprocated at this point but I wasn't sure exactly what to do and was generally nervous because I'd never been in this situation before, so he would just put his tongue back in again.

 

So, my question is, what makes a good french kiss? I guess I have some vague ideas, but I don't want to be a bad kisser and I want to be prepared in case I kiss this guy again soon. ;)

Just do what feels good.. relax and if you cant just try and mimic what hes doin..eventually itll become second nature

Posted
Haha, no, I'm not. I've just been really shy most of my life, so I haven't dated much until recently, when I've kind of forced myself to get over it and be more social, so that's why.

How old are you now?

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Posted
How old are you now?

 

Why does that matter? I don't like to give personal information out online. And, anyway, it doesn't change the answer.

Posted
Why does that matter? I don't like to give personal information out online. And, anyway, it doesn't change the answer.

Apologies; I respect your not wanting to give out personal information. And you are correct, your age doesn't matter in terms of the "how to" aspects. I was thinking in terms of your worrying about being a "bad kisser", and trying to put it into perspective of your (and his) expectations relative to your age - like if you are 16 or 18 and have never french kissed, that's perhaps a different thing than if you are 40 and never done it.

 

However, I recognize that as my digression, not yours. Question withdrawn.

 

Directly on topic: I agree with the "practice" comment. And no, it doesn't help the last kiss, and perhaps not the very next one, but it's lots of fun and you will make good progress in time. Stay relaxed, emotionally and physically. Enjoy...

Posted

damn, 4th grade?! wow. :bunny:

 

OP: i was a late bloomer, too. before 17, i had never kissed a guy (i know, i know), so i didn't really know what to do. to make it even more awkward, my first kiss ever was actually a french kiss. like you, i was just kind of stunned and didn't know what to do.

 

it was alright, though, because he didn't really know what to do, either, as it was his first kiss, too.

 

anyway, after some time (3 years) of experience (because he loved slipping the tongue. in fact, the only times he kissed me without the frenchness was when he was upset or something), i learned a few things that i knew he enjoyed, and maybe you can try it or something similar to see if your guy enjoys them too:

 

for one thing, it's always good for your lips to be smooth/soft. if for nothing else, do it for the health of your lips, meaning that it's good to buy lip balm that you can put on at night or something to increase the health and therefore the feel of your lips.

 

for on the date smoothness, i find that chap stick over lipstick is better than lip gloss.

 

as far as the actually kissing, i think it's best to start off kissing normally, without the tongue. slowly progress (by kissing "faster"/more passionately) and then slip in the tongue. i think this is actually more sensual than just sticking your tongue in there on the get go, but this is just my preference.

 

your tongue, at this point, should definitely not be stationery. move if around or else it's not fun. you can try stroking his tongue with yours, both softly and otherwise. you can also try circling around with tongue with yours--something he really enjoyed. sucking on the tongue is also fun, but just be careful it's not too hard (until you know he likes it that way, at least) because it can hurt.

 

this, of course, should be alternative by slipping your tongue back out and possibly gracing his lips with it, or just using your lips only for a bit, nibbling (i like this and so did he) and gently biting on them, and then going back in with the tongue.

 

all in all, it's a lot of variety and experimentation until you find out what he and your really like. for example, i know that my exbf used to really like when i sucked really hard on his tongue, but i don't think that is the norm. then again, i've only every kissed him, so i'm the last person to talk to about the norm, haha.

 

but yea, try it. just make sure your tongue doesn't just lay in his mouth or get so focused on the tongue kissing itself that your forget his lips. alternating is key. and a small candy can be really fun. :bunny:

 

EDIT: i forgot to mention that an essential part of a "good kiss" is not leaving your hands out of it. it doesn't mean you guys have to venture into the nether regions or anything, but you stroking his back, arms, neck, or hair with your hands definitely adds major hotness points.

Posted

WOW, WW! (Is it hot in here or is it me?)

 

Anyway, not much to add to that. Great post. Oh and I was 17 my first time too! I can't imagine having kissed someone like that in 4th grade! YIKES! I didn't even know what a French kiss was at that age.:eek:

Posted

ahh, you beat me to editing my typos. sorry, OP, i hope what i was trying to say makes sense. i wrote it too quickly.

 

anyway, yes, touche--i'm with ya. even at 17 i was still really, well, innocent in many ways. :o

 

you have to agree, though, that a great kiss is priceless. :bunny:

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Posted
EDIT: i forgot to mention that an essential part of a "good kiss" is not leaving your hands out of it. it doesn't mean you guys have to venture into the nether regions or anything, but you stroking his back, arms, neck, or hair with your hands definitely adds major hotness points.

 

i agree. he was doing this, and it was definitely hot. however, due to my own unpreparedness, i was holding my cell phone in one of my hands and my car keys in the other. :eek: makes that difficult. i'll plan ahead next time! haha

 

and as far as it having been your guy's first kiss too... that's the thing. it definitely wasn't my first kiss, but it was my first french kiss, and this guy strikes me as much more experienced. or maybe i'm assuming that because i'm so attracted to him that i assume many other ladies must have been, as well. haha. :love: so that's one of the reasons i wish i knew what i was doing. haha.

 

but, lots of good concrete suggestions in your post, thanks!

 

and, thanks everyone else, for your feedback too... i know i should relax and enjoy it and i will learn eventually, but i think i'll be more confident about it next time going into it with (a) not being thrown off guard when he kisses me and (b) having some idea what i might do. ;)

Posted
Anyway my advice is keep your mouth big soft moist and yummy and sometimes gently suck on his tongue like you would his dick! ;)

 

LOL So that's why I have gotten this reaction after kissing "The way you kiss is amazing, if you kiss like that I want to know how you would would suck my dick!"

 

Well doesn't mean I did, but nice to know they enjoyed the kiss! ;)

Posted
LOL So that's why I have gotten this reaction after kissing "The way you kiss is amazing, if you kiss like that I want to know how you would would suck my dick!"

 

Well doesn't mean I did, but nice to know they enjoyed the kiss! ;)

 

 

Nobody ever said that to me before but my BF tells me he can get off by kissing me. And sometimes we get off on each other without even having sex.

 

It's kind of cool.

Posted
Nobody ever said that to me before but my BF tells me he can get off by kissing me. And sometimes we get off on each other without even having sex.

 

It's kind of cool.

 

Now that would be cool, I know this is off topic (kinda) I know that woman woman can get off with having their nipples kissed too. I think that and what you described would be amazing!

Posted

Looks like some good advice has already been provided. Let the guy set the pace, particularly in the first couple of dates. For some reason, they prefer to do the initial...invasion. I wonder why? :laugh:

 

Once he does, like others have said, relax. It should be all about your senses except that it might help if you close your eyes. It can be awkward if the two of you are eyeball to eyeball. :lmao:

 

Caress his tongue with your tongue in a movement that feels slow and sensuous. Relax, relax, relax. This isn't lightening quick repartée.

 

Rule of thumb, let each other breath and nothing beyond the epiglottis. ;)

  • Author
Posted

I'll just follow his lead and relax and follow some of y'all's advice... thanks.

 

And don't worry, my eyes were definitely closed, I can see how it would be awkward if we were staring each other down while we were making out... hahaha!

Posted

practice in front of mirror ehehehe you can also lick it lol

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