uniqueone Posted September 22, 2007 Posted September 22, 2007 During this whole period with the out of town guy I was "involved" with, I was trying to date others...or at least make friendships, so that I wouldn't be so focused on him. I met a guy online who was local. (I've told this story already so it might sound familiar). After a few dates, he was in love with me. He treated me like a queen...which I really needed at the time- but he kept wanting to get closer and closer and I knew I had to do something because I wasn't feeling the same way. I wanted to wait until after my trip (visiting the out of town guy) because I didn't want any drama while I was miles and miles away. Of course you know the story....out of town guy who I really liked.....abandoned me while I was visiting him and I'm still not over that. Picture this....I was literally laying on the bed crying "Please don't abandon me" as he walked out of the hotel room at midnight while I was thousands of miles away from home. I come back home from this traumatic incident and local guy takes me out to eat. (local guy doesn't know I visited someone else). He says how he's been thinking I should move in with him. I realize I have to say something and did. I basically tell him I want to be friends right now (we'd basically just been going out for dinner and coffee for a few weeks and there'd been nothing physical except when he tried a few times to kiss me.) After a lot of difficulty, he says he's ok with being friends. Then a week or so later, he starts pushing me for more...telling me how I can develop chemistry (I'd told him I didn't have any chemistry with him). He got to be so persistant I told him that I didn't think we could be friends. Then he turned nasty and said some cruel things...and this is when I was in a down period due to the out of town guy. I ceased talking to local guy. Recently I had something published that I'd written and sent it to a group of people in an email. I tend to have a bad habit of forgetting and forgiving the past and so I included local guy in the email. He sent me a few emails and I replied in very short answers and kept it impersonal. A few days ago, I had flowers delivered to my house and they were red roses and were from him. I sent him an email saying "Thank you for the flowers" and that was all I said. He replied back something about loving me and I didn't respond. Today he sends me an email with the lyrics to "Nights in White Satin" and had bolded the parts that say "Cause I love you....Yes I love you." He titled the email "The music tells my story". My dilemma is whether or not to ignore him or whether I should tell him that this is inappropriate.
johan Posted September 22, 2007 Posted September 22, 2007 I don't know, but... Air Supply Lost In Love I realize the best part of love is the thinnest slice And it don't count for much but I'm not letting go I believe there's still much to believe in So lift your eyes if you feel you can Reach for a star and I'll show you a plan I figured it out What I needed was someone to show me You know you can't fool me I've been loving you too long It started so easy You want to carry on (Chorus) Lost In Love and I don't know much Was I thinking aloud and fell out of touch? But I'm back on my feet and eager to be what you wanted So lift your eyes if you feel you can Reach for a star and I'll show you a plan I figured it out What I needed was someone to show me You know you can't fool me I've been loving you too long It started so easy You want to carry on (Chorus) You know you can't fool me I've been loving you too long It started so easy You want to carry on (Chorus) Now I'm lost, lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Now I'm lost, lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Lost in love, lost in love, lost in love
Author uniqueone Posted September 22, 2007 Author Posted September 22, 2007 (Chorus) Now I'm lost, lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Now I'm lost, lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Lost in love, lost in love, lost in love That's not funny! I told a friend of mine about it and he said "thanks, I used to really like the Moody Blues and now you're ruining that for me!" (he's met the guy) You know, this guy first started emailing me back in May and (in May) he bought tickets for us for a Moody Blues concert that was at the end of July...he bought them before he'd even met me! Turns out that's right when I stopped talking to him so I didn't go with him. I am sooooo glad I didn't go with him. He probably would have sang that song to me right there!!!
Author uniqueone Posted September 22, 2007 Author Posted September 22, 2007 This is what the email said exactly: This music tell my story..... Knights in White Satin Never Reaching the End Letters I've Written Never Meaning to Send Beauty is all this With these eyes before me Just what the truth is I can't say anymore Cause I Love You Yes I Love You Gazing at people Some hand in hand Just what I am going through They can't understand Some try to tell me Thoughts they cannnot defend Just what you want to be You will be in the end Cause I Love You Yes I Love You
jcster Posted September 22, 2007 Posted September 22, 2007 My dilemma is whether or not to ignore him or whether I should tell him that this is inappropriate. I would ignore him...forever. You're going to have to go no-contact on this guy if you don't want him to turn into a stalker. He's definitely got the vibe. You are very wise to stay away from this guy.
Illicit Angel Posted September 22, 2007 Posted September 22, 2007 I've been loving you too long Now I'm lost, lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Now I'm lost, lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Lost in love, lost in love, lost in love Hahaha .... it's not the same guy is it ....?!?!?! LMAO Ignore him .... that is freaky. He is probably just trying to a sweet guy, but unfortunatly he is not at all in tune with you and is coming off scary! He'll go away when get's the point
Yamaha Posted September 23, 2007 Posted September 23, 2007 I would ignore him...forever. You're going to have to go no-contact on this guy if you don't want him to turn into a stalker. He's definitely got the vibe. You are very wise to stay away from this guy. Word..... He sounds like he can't handle rejection so you need to keep your distance and give him NOOO encouragement.
Author uniqueone Posted September 23, 2007 Author Posted September 23, 2007 My friends said I need to tell him but everyone on here so far is saying to ignore him. I just know how I'd feel and I just don't think it's right to ignore someone at this point. I feel like it's my fault. We were no longer in contact but then I sent him that article. I was just sending it to people I knew that would be interested in reading it but I guess I shouldn't have included him. I know how it feels to be ignored when you have feelings for someone. Although I've never done anything like he's doing, I have wanted a response from someone before and gotten none and I know it's worse than getting an answer. Despite the fact that he said some pretty mean things to me, I still hate to do that to anyone. I think I'm going to send him an email and say "The things you're sending me are just inappropriate. I sent you that article but I think you misunderstood. It didn't mean that I wanted to start a relationship. It looks like I'll have to refrain from even general news-sharing because it looks as though too much is read into it. Sorry if it caused a misunderstanding."
mental_traveller Posted September 24, 2007 Posted September 24, 2007 Is this for real? Stop leading him on. Tell him you aren't interested, and break contact. End of story. Don't ignore him just like that. He has the right to know you aren't interested. So far you have basically deceived him by not being honest with your intentions, so it's entirely your fault he has got his hopes up. You need to crush his expectations and make it crystal clear there is nothing between you and never will be. Once you have explained that, and politely brushed off his inevitable reply email, that is when you start to ignore him (because if he contacts you more, he's ignoring your wishes and being pushy).
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