Author DateAnalyzer Posted September 21, 2007 Author Posted September 21, 2007 Okay DA, honestly stop overanalyzing comments that are completely normal. Also, sometimes the attraction isn't huge on the first date but that doesn't mean that it won't get better on the second. Ask her out again and if it doesn't work out then give up on it. Aren't you trying to get to a second date with someone by age 33 or something? (I read something like that in one of your other posts). And please stop this 'indoor friend' crap, it's stupid. If you keep being so critical about people you will end up completely alone. I want a second date with a female who turns me on. Big Difference
amber1 Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 Well maybe if you give her a second date she will turn you on. No offense, but since you are so critical I think that you should give all of the girls a second date just in case you were overanalyzing or second guessing while you were on the first one.
sweetbutcheeky Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 All I'm saying is if a guy goes on a blind date with someone he is not attracted to, he will notice other attractive girls. But give me some credit, I did walk her home so I could have just said goodnight. He will notice yes, if he is looking ... So what? So you walked a girl home that you didn't like that you weren't paying attention to because you were looking at other woman! I would say the weirdest part of the date was when I first walked up to her at the cafe we agree to go to and she said-"Hi, we can go in here or do you want to go somewhere else?? huh??? Why would I want to go somewhee else??? What are you smoking? Why is that weird? That's where you agreed to meet but she was being nice to see if you wanted to stay there or if there was somewhere else that you would prefer. I don't know why you though the comment about her brother coming to visit was strange also. I honestly don't know why a woman would agree to go on a first date with you, my guess is that she doesn't know the side of you that we see here. Doesn't know what your really thinking.
Author DateAnalyzer Posted September 21, 2007 Author Posted September 21, 2007 He will notice yes, if he is looking ... So what? So you walked a girl home that you didn't like that you weren't paying attention to because you were looking at other woman! What are you smoking? Why is that weird? That's where you agreed to meet but she was being nice to see if you wanted to stay there or if there was somewhere else that you would prefer. I don't know why you though the comment about her brother coming to visit was strange also. I honestly don't know why a woman would agree to go on a first date with you, my guess is that she doesn't know the side of you that we see here. Doesn't know what your really thinking. I just didnt see the point of mentioning her brother when I'm trying to get to know her. I didnt talk about my brother or any other relative so I wasn't quite sure why she did it. I wanted to hear about HER not her family so soon
sweetbutcheeky Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 I just didnt see the point of mentioning her brother when I'm trying to get to know her. I didnt talk about my brother or any other relative so I wasn't quite sure why she did it. I wanted to hear about HER not her family so soon OMG Why does it matter?! Seriously, so she mentioned her brother and you wouldn't have mentioned anything about any relatives. There are no rules! You said you wanted to get to know her, well then that does include that she has a brother! Just because you wouldn't have talked about family doesn't mean that it's strange or wrong, not everyone lives by what goes on in your head!! It's first date awkward small talk! There are no rights or wrong things to talk about (well other than past relationships). You are getting to know each other so it hard to know what to talk about, so she was probably thinking about things that were going on in her life and thought she would share it with you!
amber1 Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 Mentioning family members on a date is totally normal. There is nothing wrong with it. After all, she might be close to her family and that is a good thing.
Krytellan Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 DA, do you really think that this dating technique is going to do you any good when you meet someone who does turn you on? When that happens you'll be such a wreck the moment will be over like that. That's why you need to take advantage of learning opportunities. For example, her comment about going somewhere else was a functional and nice wasy of saying she wanted to go somewhere else. I bet you have absolutely no idea that's what that was about b/c you were thinking only of yourself and how pretty she was(n't).
Lyssa Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 DA, have you ever put yourself in the other shoe? What if a woman analyzes you as you always do other women?
Cobra_X30 Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 I just didnt see the point of mentioning her brother when I'm trying to get to know her. I didnt talk about my brother or any other relative so I wasn't quite sure why she did it. I wanted to hear about HER not her family so soon DA, What about this girl failed to turn you on? Also, would you not consider her brother to be an important part of her life?
Author DateAnalyzer Posted September 21, 2007 Author Posted September 21, 2007 DA, do you really think that this dating technique is going to do you any good when you meet someone who does turn you on? When that happens you'll be such a wreck the moment will be over like that. That's why you need to take advantage of learning opportunities. For example, her comment about going somewhere else was a functional and nice wasy of saying she wanted to go somewhere else. I bet you have absolutely no idea that's what that was about b/c you were thinking only of yourself and how pretty she was(n't). when u say she wanted to go somewhere else, I'm confused. Why would that be the case if she was at the cafe waiting for me, the cafe we agreed to go to on the phone?
Author DateAnalyzer Posted September 21, 2007 Author Posted September 21, 2007 DA, What about this girl failed to turn you on? Also, would you not consider her brother to be an important part of her life? I didn;t say she was UNATTRACTIVE, i just said overall she didn;t stimulate me. She would be cool to have has a friend but she don;t have that THING that a woman needs to be girlfriend material
Lyssa Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 I didn;t say she was UNATTRACTIVE, i just said overall she didn;t stimulate me. She would be cool to have has a friend but she don;t have that THING that a woman needs to be girlfriend material If I may ask, what kinda THING that a woman needs to be girlfriend material?
Author DateAnalyzer Posted September 21, 2007 Author Posted September 21, 2007 Maybe she didn't quite like that cafe... well why would she agree on the phone that we go there then?
Lyssa Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 Does she frequent that cafe often? Could be that when she got there, she didn't like what she saw or the surroundings... Sometimes I would agree on a place and when I get there, I don't quite like it and would suggest elsewhere..
Author DateAnalyzer Posted September 21, 2007 Author Posted September 21, 2007 If I may ask, what kinda THING that a woman needs to be girlfriend material? sex appeal
Author DateAnalyzer Posted September 21, 2007 Author Posted September 21, 2007 Does she frequent that cafe often? Could be that when she got there, she didn't like what she saw or the surroundings... Sometimes I would agree on a place and when I get there, I don't quite like it and would suggest elsewhere.. well that was the first time that ever happened to me on a date so it was kind of surprising because i didn;t have a list of restarunts in my pocket that we could go to besides that place we agreed on
sweetbutcheeky Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 sex appeal Have you ever had a girlfriend? And if so how long did that last?
2sunny Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 well why would she agree on the phone that we go there then? my god man - give it a rest! go on a date and don't even think about it ahead of time! play everything by ear - have fun - be spontaneous! men like you bore me to tears. why does everything have to be so rigid and planned out? why couldn't you just walk her down the way and get some pasta and wine and have some fun for a few hours? geeez, i think you may want to consider some ocd meds - seriously! live a little. women don't want to waste time with men who need to find every little criticism about what they do or say!
Star Gazer Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 OMG, I've had enough. *facepalms* Holy sh*t, in the process of getting to know her and what she's about, she mentioned her brother! OH NO! How dare she! She's supposed to focus allllll on herself. She must be crazy weird! And F-her for politely mentioning her amenability to going to another place if you wanted, how weird was that? (SARCASM, in case you can't tell.) You need serious, serious help, DA. Your threads are actually painful to read through. Have you ever considered getting a dating coach or something? Someone to literally hold your hand through mock dates and explain to you how NORMAL women behave during dates, and what are (and are NOT) reasonable expectations when meeting a stranger for a first date????????
Cobra_X30 Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 sex appeal Yet you stated that she may be good as an indoor friend! Was that a joke on your part? Do you see the problem with that statement? DA, How many long term relationships have you had? It seems you have a very strong fear of rejection.
melodymatters Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 WHY do I read these posts ?!? It's like picking a scab ! TALKING about things going on in your life is NORMAL, ie: brother coming to visit. Checking to make sure you guys wanted to stay there, or maybe nah, lets go somewhere we can get a drink, IS NORMAL. YOU checking out other woman and defining people as indoor or outdoor friends is NOT NORMAL I really hope and pray that you are a troll who posts these idiocies to get us all worked up, that would be preferable to thinking you are actually out there dating !!!
Lyssa Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 I don't even think Hitch would be able to help DA.
sb129 Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes: I want a second date with a female who turns me on. Big Difference Well if you continue to behave like this, its not looking likely is it? Man, you are such a harsh judge. The girl was doing what is commonly called MAKING CONVERSATION. A normal thing to do on a first date. when u say she wanted to go somewhere else, I'm confused. Why would that be the case if she was at the cafe waiting for me, the cafe we agreed to go to on the phone? Because she was being a nice, reasonable person. When I meet friends, we agree to meet somewhere that is easy for everyone to get to, and is easy to find, or somewhere that everyone knows how to get to. We dont ALWAYS GO there. Sometimes people decide they are hungry, or want a particular kind of food, or want cake from a specific cafe or whatever. Maybe she didn't want to call and change the venue, because that can be annoying and confusing? Really, is it that significant? Learn some manners and stop being so superficial/dismissive. Your combination of insecurity, self absorption and nastiness is sure to turn women off. Yup. Looking at other women is rude.
2sunny Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 on a side note - you should have been there at the designated time - that was rude of you! and who - in this day and age - doesn't even have a cell phone? ... even destitute people find a way to keep one going. i think you were rude to keep HER waiting - and checking out other gals through your meeting.
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