LoveLace Posted September 18, 2007 Posted September 18, 2007 I already knew about my boyfriend's divorce from several months ago; I also already knew that she was very ignorant about the whole thing and since he's not a believer of divorce, it was a huge blow to him (they were married less than 2 yrs.). He also informed me at one point that he went through a pretty bad phase with depression and took meds, etc. Quite a while back, I expressed my concern to him because I once dated a guy fresh out of a similar situation and I ended up being a rebound, and this dude just wanted a girl to fill the void of space. My BF assured me then I am not in that position, and he's constantly saying how happy he is and how he wants us to have a future together. But more has come to the surface; we spent this past weekend together and he informed me that his depression got so bad that he was suicidal; sat in the garage with the car on...and his parents rushed him to an ER at one point, then he ended up in a psych ward for 2-3 days; he was telling me how horrible the whole experience was, and how his actions were probably just a cry for help. The factor of suddenly being alone and scared beat him down big-time. And there were a couple girls before me, and he seems to be completely confident and together now. While talking to me about his experience this weekend he said, "Sometimes you just want to dwell on things, etc.....but then you meet someone special, and you can finally just lock it up and throw away the key"....might sound corny, but by far the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me. I said I hope that I'm not soley responsible for his newfound contentment, I said I'd like to think you came up with some on your own before meeting me, which he claims that he did. And I do not feel that he's using me to "fill the space". It seems that I truly make him happy, and vice-versa. However, I realize how fragile he might be. If I broke up with him, he'd be crushed. Yet I feel the same way about him. He's constantly assuring me that he loves me, etc., but how can I be 100% sure that it's really me he loves and not just the idea of replacing his loss? He even claims to be happier with me than he was with his ex-wife. The 1st time he said he loved me, he admitted it was kind of hard to say to someone after what he went through. But since then, it feels very real and sincere when he says it. And he makes it clear that he wants a future with me without a single doubt. We are like best friends and we haven't been together all that long. Am I being insecure or just trying to be realistic here?
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