katiesmith1b Posted September 18, 2007 Posted September 18, 2007 I've noticed that every time I go to my friends apartment, she lives upstairs from me, When she's there, her husband stays in their bedroom on the computer. But I've noticed that about everytime that I've been over, her husband has been cleaning his guns in the same room as me and his wife. He doesnt even use all the guns he has. I bet he cleans them 2 or more times a week. I hang out with my friend (his wife) often. Today, I made jewelry, and babysat their daughter, and also watched after my 2 yr. old. The wife went to church, and the husband took their other child to martial arts practice. When they(hubby and son) got back, the boy took his bath and went to bed. While the daughter was in the shower, the husband told me that he and some people at his work, threw a party at work for an attractive girl, and his wife didnt know about it. He also mentioned another girl at the party that asked him to cheat on his wife with her. He said he told her no. (I wonder) I notice that everytime I'm at their house, he stays in the same room as me, and not on the computer like he does when his wife is there, from this first experience. He was on the laptop, in the kitchen I had to squeeze by him to throw trash away. He would barely move, it was like he wanted me to bump into him. He left his aZz out like on purpose. He also acts totally different around me when his wife is there I noticed today. He calls her babe and baby a lot, and doesnt talk NEAR as much as when shes gone. When I first met them, he didnt even so much as sit next to her. (still doesnt.) Also today, when my friend (his wife) came back from church, and after he went to bed, she told me that on one of the days that she went to the school and subst. a class, that she got to talking to the janitor there, and he was really nice. The guy gave her his number!!!! I asked if she told her husband, she said no. BUt she said she asked him (hubby) if she could still just be friends with the guy, like meet up at the library, always in public, non romantic places, to hang out. DOES ANYONE THINK ALL THIS SOUNDS REALLY WEIRD?????? I think she never told him (hubby) nothing, and is gonna have an affair. While they were both gone, I looked on the computer, and checked the history, there were several personal dating sites that someone had visited. Gosh I wonder if theyre unhappy. theyve been married 7 yrs. (the itch?) she goes to celebrate recovery regularly, i think the husband goes with her sometimes. the gun cleaning thing, why does he do that, it has to be the strangest married man behavior I've ever seen. Is he trying to clean up secrets in a figurative way?????? maybe theyre swingers...... its got me really stumped, she talks about God, her hubby cusses, they both seem to be doing things they shouldnt in some way or another I cant quite put my finger on it. I dont want to get caught up in any adultery bull garbage, I love my husband, and I dont want to allow myself to be tempted. maybe I should break off my friendship with them all together. I wish I could say the husband was hideous, but he looks identical to the lead singer of daughtry the band. So unfortunately, he is kind of cute. But brad pitt couldnt move me to cheat on my husband. theres no amout of "looks", that can replace what I have, thats taken me 5yrs to achieve with my husband. I'd be throwing 5 yrs away, I aint that kind of fool.
LucreziaBorgia Posted September 18, 2007 Posted September 18, 2007 Don't go looking for trouble, and when it comes looking for you - walk the other way. Honestly, if you are feeling hinky about this your best bet might be to just start being 'busy' instead of hanging out with this couple.
Author katiesmith1b Posted September 26, 2007 Author Posted September 26, 2007 thank you so much for the reply. i will begin the detachment process. so far i've been gone every weekend, and thats the main times that she wants to hang out with me. so i think i'll be able to do it successfully. i apprecite your help jess.
NYCmitch25 Posted September 26, 2007 Posted September 26, 2007 I take it that he is using his "hobby" as a way to hang around with you and his wife. Nice, nothing like watching a person polish an assault riffle for 'fun'. If you can't tell, gun people creep me out a bit. Now when you mention this: " he and some people at his work, threw a party at work for an attractive girl, and his wife didnt know about it. He also mentioned another girl at the party that asked him to cheat on his wife with her. He said he told her no." Do you think he meant this: "I am going to make up a scenario or exaggerate a real situation to illustrate that I'm (still) attractive to women and also, to get your moral view on the issue of cheating." ? Which also begs to ask some obvious questions. I think your suspicions are right, that something is a little less than copacetic. He probably doesn't want to leave his wife, but he is unsatisfied with their sexual relationship and probably sees you as an attractive and convenient side-dish on some level. He feels some sexual tension with you and it sounds like you want to have nothing to do with it. I would be sure to illustrate that view to him indirectly (at least). Now when she says: "But she said she asked him (hubby) if she could still just be friends with the guy [janitor], like meet up at the library, always in public, non romantic places, to hang out." I don't where to put the moral compass on that one. Apparently she feels inadequate on some level perhaps but it's not indicative that she plans on acting out some fantasy; then again it could be naivety that it's hanging out innocent fun. Who knows. I guess you could ask her creative questions about it to see where she stands (if you care). They probably need marriage counciling, the question is do you want to work through this with them or just wash your hands of it all together? There are so many people on this big rock ... maybe it's time to find people a little more stable.. ?
Cobra_X30 Posted September 26, 2007 Posted September 26, 2007 I'm not even going to comment on how wierd this couple is! I agree with LB that you should stay far far away!
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