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To get to know someone better


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Posted

Hi I'm new here,

 

I wasn't quite sure where to post this - professional relationships, friendship or friends and lovers, so I went for middle ground.

 

I'm quite well aquainted with one of our managing directors. In the last three years we developed a kind of friendship, which, however, we never took out of the workplace, and I could swear that sparks are flying between us.

 

But somehow we hardly know each other so I finally took all my courage together and asked if he would like to go for something to eat before we move offices. I emailed him, just that, no explanations, nothing, just this sentence.

 

The reply came within half an hour... he's away this week (I knew that) but next week should work and he's looking forward to it.

 

Now, for me this is not a date. It's a chance to look closer at that man I think I know but who in fact I know nothing about (same goes the other way). But I have no idea if he interpreted my email the same way.

 

What I need help with, because I hate prying, but up to a point I will have to if I want to get to know him better, is what to ask him.

Posted

Well, talk on MSN, the phone, text him maybe, get to know him, meet him in person, I'm going to meet a girl this Wesnesday, this kinda thing takes guts though.

  • Author
Posted

No, you misunderstood, we have met. We have lunch on a regular basis, but we never took it out of the office. We had private talks, but never more than 10/15 minutes and even they were somehow job related.

I simply have no idea what to talk about with a guy!

Posted

Hmm, well. Tell him how nice he works, or ask him how work is going, this kinda thing is hard :(

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

Find out what he likes to do in his spare time. Tell him about any movies you've seen, anything exciting happening around you, talk about the new office move.

Posted

I definitely agree with asking about hobbies, where he's from, how he likes the town/traffic/weather, etc. Get his opinions on things. If you know him a little better ask about his family, his goals, personal interests: does he play video games or listen to opera, etc.

 

The more interested you are in a person the more interesting you seem. If he likes football then you can make an effort for the next meeting to know something about his favorite team. When people know you're listening to them they often feel more comfortable.

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