route1 Posted September 16, 2007 Posted September 16, 2007 i miss my ex so much but do not love her anymore she is beatuiful and would do anything for me. i care about her so much and am finding it hard to let her go completly. i want to tell her i miss her but wont let myself because its not fair on her i was with her 3 1/2 years. she always wanted to get married and i didnt but i didnt want to lose her. i just dont understand how you can miss someone so much but not love them the way they love you. i do love her but not that way. also the thought of seeing her about makes my heart race and the thought her with some one else makes me sick. all these feelings are strange and new to me can any 1 relate to them at all? or am i mad?
ls707 Posted September 16, 2007 Posted September 16, 2007 i miss my ex so much but do not love her anymore she is beatuiful and would do anything for me. i care about her so much and am finding it hard to let her go completly. i want to tell her i miss her but wont let myself because its not fair on her i was with her 3 1/2 years. she always wanted to get married and i didnt but i didnt want to lose her. i just dont understand how you can miss someone so much but not love them the way they love you. i do love her but not that way. also the thought of seeing her about makes my heart race and the thought her with some one else makes me sick. all these feelings are strange and new to me can any 1 relate to them at all? or am i mad? we all have been through this some time or the other; but you dumped her. If she was such a special person why did you dump her? You said you dont love her the way she does love you? So you decided to just let it go without thinking of the consequences thoroughly. Well If you can win her back try to; but I doubt shes gonna love you the same way she did before you broke up with her.
Author route1 Posted September 16, 2007 Author Posted September 16, 2007 i dumped her because i did not feel i loved her enough to get married and that is what she wanted she is a special person but because i care for her so much i just find it hard to understand why i dont love her that way when she is such a good person is there something wrong with me? i have tried to force myself to love her. is it normall to feel confused about all this even tho i finished it for what i thought was the right reasons
norajane Posted September 16, 2007 Posted September 16, 2007 What makes you think you don't love her in 'that' way? You didn't feel the chemistry? You didn't enjoy the sex? You're attracted to other women? You were bored with her? You aren't compatible in some way?
Newtotheblogthing Posted September 16, 2007 Posted September 16, 2007 I am wondering the same thing as norajane. Is it a gut feeling that you aren't in love with her or are you just comparing the way she "acts" in love.. Maybe you have unrealistic expectations of yourself. Noone loves in the same way. Either way after being with someone for that long it's impossible not to feel the things you are feeling. I understand.. Until you figure it out, I would be really careful about her feelings... and contacting her. It will confuse her.
daZed&confUsed005 Posted September 16, 2007 Posted September 16, 2007 i miss my ex so much but do not love her anymore she is beatuiful and would do anything for me. i care about her so much and am finding it hard to let her go completly. i want to tell her i miss her but wont let myself because its not fair on her i was with her 3 1/2 years. she always wanted to get married and i didnt but i didnt want to lose her. i just dont understand how you can miss someone so much but not love them the way they love you. i do love her but not that way. also the thought of seeing her about makes my heart race and the thought her with some one else makes me sick. all these feelings are strange and new to me can any 1 relate to them at all? or am i mad? ok bro..i think you do love her..in my opinion you are just not ready for marriage and need to work on that but otherwise i think you do love. you all said these feelings are new to you.. i am currently going through the same thing but in my case i haven't told her how i feel due to the fact tht she is one of my friends and has a boyfriend whom she is going out with for like 2-3 months.. oh well..when did you break up with her?? because if it was quite recent you still might have a chance to get her back by coming out clean..telling her that you've never had these types of feelings before for a girl and were confused and also that you're not ready for a big commitment like marriage
Author route1 Posted September 16, 2007 Author Posted September 16, 2007 thanks newtotheblog i am just confused myself. and it is just that gut feeling that your not in love anymore. i just wanted to no is it really normal to miss the person as much as i do. or sometimes i think it is because i am so used to her being here and now she is not. i think plain white ts new song describes love and i am dont feel like that any more. its all just confusing at the minute.
Author route1 Posted September 16, 2007 Author Posted September 16, 2007 we broke up a month ago. and her family hate me for the way it happened it was so out of the blue. i am a beilever in god and guess if it was ment to be it will work itself out. and if i pray i will get the answers i was just wondering can you still feel jealous of them moving on. ie. meeting other men even tho you may not be in love + still miss them?
Newtotheblogthing Posted September 16, 2007 Posted September 16, 2007 Absolutely!! Listen, I broke up with my ex for good reasons. Then I kept him around because I wasn't sure. He has since turned the tables on me and is now dating someone. I am devastated, I was obsessed with it. Hurt, crying, anxious. It may not seem right but I do still love him. In fact maybe this is what it took for me to see it OR I am just terrified that he is with someone else and he isn't pining for me. I am still not sure. I just know that I decided after his pleading with me to let it go, I finally did. I didn't contact him for 5 days mainly (honestly) to see if he would miss me. And of course he contacted me last night kinda drunk. I hate to say this but we are both being selfish. Me imparticular. I am seeing someone to get over it (the person I am with is doing the same) but he was my love for 3 years and I am used to him, I did everything with him built a life and the change is disorienting and painful. I don't know if it's ego or truly that we are meant for each other. I still don't know what's going to happen but I am not going to contact him and like you, I have faith that it will work itself out. I don't want to act on my impulses because I am not clear on my motives. I don't want to hurt him or myself. I hate the way this sounds but it's just truthful. I don't always make decisions based on what's best for him or me. I am trying. What you are feeling is NORMAL. Just try to be better than I was. Give her space and figure out what you REALLY want. That's all we can do. Walk throught he pain, the feelings and believe that god has a plan for us. At least I do.
carrotgirl Posted September 16, 2007 Posted September 16, 2007 But we were together shorter than you and your ex. A couple days ago my ex broke up with me. He told me he doesn't love me and I believe him. I believed him a few days ago when he was loving me and everything was so wonderful with us too. I miss him and it's only been a few days. I'm really in love with the guy and there is nothing I can do about it. He made a decision. So I drank a lot of wine and hung out with my brother and have been crying a lot. I have no idea what to think about any of it!
Author route1 Posted September 17, 2007 Author Posted September 17, 2007 i no newto theblog i have come on here like evryone else for answers and to see how other people dealt with there similar problems. and your right i will just let god carry me threw this. my heart tells me i would like to be with her but cant fully commit which lets me believe i am not in love. its just i think i dont want her and maybe dont want anyone else to have her. sounds maybe like your problem to. and carrotgirl i think you should do your best to let him go. for him to be able to say that means he has maybe felt that way for some time. just be careful there. if he is selfish he will ask you to get back even tho he is not in love with you and in the long run that will hurt you more.
Chrome Barracuda Posted September 17, 2007 Posted September 17, 2007 i miss my ex so much but do not love her anymore she is beatuiful and would do anything for me. i care about her so much and am finding it hard to let her go completly. i want to tell her i miss her but wont let myself because its not fair on her i was with her 3 1/2 years. she always wanted to get married and i didnt but i didnt want to lose her. i just dont understand how you can miss someone so much but not love them the way they love you. i do love her but not that way. also the thought of seeing her about makes my heart race and the thought her with some one else makes me sick. all these feelings are strange and new to me can any 1 relate to them at all? or am i mad? Let's be real you knew she was the right one for you , but you wanted to play the field and go back when you was ready, life doesnt always work out like that. I'd say let it go and move on, you had your chance and you blew it. I'm sorry.
justfine Posted September 17, 2007 Posted September 17, 2007 Route1, I think you're missing her because she was always around and you became accustomed to having her company, much like a buddy. I think you did the right thing by letting her go because I believe you when you say you weren't in love with her. After a few more weeks, you'll become accustomed to her not being there. Stop obsessing about her and make a new life for yourself. Before you know it, you won't miss her anymore.
Author route1 Posted September 17, 2007 Author Posted September 17, 2007 just fine thank you very much thats what i needed to here. i just need to be told just to start making a new life for myself it must be because she was always there and then she wasnt i have to stop obsessing your right you have ben vey helpful there thank you
blueladybird Posted September 26, 2007 Posted September 26, 2007 I feel very sorry for her. You may never find someone like her. Thats the things with men, they are not always satisfied.lol. You dont have to get married now...but i understand wat u mean. If you're not attracted to her physically etc. Why were you her boyfriend tho? I dont get it. Time would make you forget about her i guess.
bloodaye Posted September 27, 2007 Posted September 27, 2007 i did the same thing bro,my girl wuld bend over backwards for me,do anyhting,she put me on a pedestal.but my problem is accepting someones love,i can never understand why someone wuld b so devoted to me,and i became distant,these r insecurities i need to work on,i come from a very un loving family,im not used to people telling me they love me and such,but i came to realize that this girl means the world to me,and if i dont shape up im gonna lose her,which i almost did,but she wants me back,and that says a hell of alot about her, seeing that i became pretty much a total jerk towards the end,the guilt was overwhelming,cause she didnt desereve how i treated her,she was more then good to me and loved me to death,i loved her also,but didnt show it as much as i shuld have,then when she took a break from me,i realized what i ahd lost and in fact she did me a favor,i learned alot from that breakup and it made me a better person.shes incredible,and i will never repeat my mistakes.
jade6147 Posted October 4, 2007 Posted October 4, 2007 I think you do love her, its just sometimes when your partner is pushing you into something you are not ready for, it makes you want to run and you end up making a bad decsion. how old are the two of you, is there a big age difference?
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