loverboy18 Posted September 16, 2007 Posted September 16, 2007 Alright, so my girlfriend broke up with me in late April. We went out for a little over 2 years and the relationship was great until about the last 3 months of it. we were both hella sprung off each other, but then I got kinda tired of her, stopped putting forth the effort, started smoking a lot of weed, and just kept forgetting to do/remembering little things and it pissed her off. She finally had enough, and broke up with me. Mind you, she made this decision around the time she was deciding where to go to college and decides to go to school in southern cal. and we are both from nor cal. I told her that we could make things work over the summer and she was not leaving for school for about 4 months. Anyways, right after the breakup, I mean within a day, I stopped smoking weed, and told her I would change and do anything to have her back, because i absolutely LOVE this girl to the fullest (I dont know why i stopped paying attention, it was probably the weed). So, I did just that. I stopped smoking weed, started paying A LOT more attention to her, then a bad problem happened on myspace. I wont get in the details of that but lets just say that we didnt talk for the last 2 weeks of May, but still texted very sporadically. She said that I would never have a chance with her again, and this just broke my heart. Then, on like the last day of May, I get this phone call from her. She sounded really happy to talk and later on that day she called me again to tell me some news. I asked if she wanted to hang out and we went out to dinner. At dinner I asked her if we could just be friends over the summer and she said fine, so I left it at that. About a week later I take her to the movies and drop her off, walk her up to the door and say goodnight. I get a text from her that night saying "did you want to kiss me?" So, from here on, I knew she still wanted me in some way. We end up hanging out more and more in June, now we are having sex and being affectionate just as much as we did while we were together. I gave her space and let her go out and do her thing, but I knew we would talk and possibly hang out everyday. In July, it was the same story, but this time with more sex and even more hanging out, more affection, more everything (Like hanging out everyday at this point). I visited her at work, gave her flowers, and did everything in the book to show her that I had changed. I took her out to lunch, dinner, ice cream, all the time. She would make comments about these things she wanted like some earrings, shoes, whatever, and I would buy them for her. She was always sooo happy when I bought her these things and she would always give me a big kiss saying thank you! she would always thank me for taking her out. When august came around, we were hanging out like everyday, all day long. Things were great, we were always having fun, laughing, doing great stuff, and I would ask her what her intentions with me were. She would always say that she just wanted to be my friend, but we never act like any friends i have ever seen. Plus, whenever I would bring this up, she sounded annoyed and was very short in her answers. She would kiss me as much as I would kiss her, I would shower her with massages and everything, and she loved it. We dont act like just friends. So, about 4 weeks ago, she moved down to so cal to go to school, but she has been home 2 times since then, for a couple days each time. When she is home, we still act the same way we acted all summer, but when she is away, she has a hard time answering my calls and does not get back to me for hours. I try to give her the space she needs, but its so hard after everything we did this summer. She says that im not her boyfriend and she wanted to be my friend from the start, but we DONT ACT LIKE FRIENDS! and it is messing with my head. I know that she is in a new place, is experiencing new things, going out a lot and needs her space, but I just dont know her intentions on things. She will text me one day with "I like you", and then will not talk to me for hours the next. Ever since she has left though, we have talked everyday on average of about 2-3 times a day. Then yesterday, I had too much of it and turned off my phone after we had a conversation about her saying she just wanted to be my friend. I dont know if I should talk to her anymore, but my feelings for her are mad crazy, I love the girl! The next time I will see her too is in about a month. It seems as though when she knows she is going to see me, that she is like the nicest sweetest person, but when she is away, its like I dont even know the girl. Can somebody help me out here? What does she really mean by saying she just wants to be my friend?
Scorpio13c Posted September 17, 2007 Posted September 17, 2007 Hi Loverboy18, You two are young & at a distance, start dating some other girls & then see if she changes her tune about just being friends. Give her what she wants & be friends & do what friends do - not talk to each other 80 times a day, more like a couple times a week. See if that works. Scorp
ftheunion Posted September 18, 2007 Posted September 18, 2007 Just say your head is messed up cause of mixed messages. Tell her you care a lot about her, but if she don't need you more than a friend, than you don't need to keep botherin her, and cut the chord. Then let her do all the goin back. Let her feel how you felt. Then just listen to brutal death metal music and stuff.
XxBacktoBlackXx Posted September 21, 2007 Posted September 21, 2007 I wouldn't trust her. There's too much game playing going on here. Move on.
shoesies05 Posted September 23, 2007 Posted September 23, 2007 I'd say leave her, as a friend and lover. She sounds like she's using you or unsure of what she wants. Maybe once youre gone she'll realize what she's missing and want you back. But i dont see that happening. Besides, you two live far apart and you are young and now is the time to go out and date and really get to see what you want in a girl and what you dont want. Plus you deserve to have someone show u the affection and care for you the way that you care for this girl now. It should be a mutual feeling.
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