people judge me coz i take my clothes off for a living. drives me nuts.

[bish]

I became friends with a neighbor through our kids playing together. When our sons were both in elementary school we would go to some of the school programs together.

 

On more than one occasion I have been asked by rude women questions like "Why were you sitting with _____, you know she used to be a stripper". Or they will say things like "she met her husband stripping at a club".

 

Those types of women talk bad about everybody.

 

Oh come on..like if you were talking to her at a gathering and you asked her what she did and she said, "I'm a stripper" or the BS version of it.."I'm an exotic dancers"...you'd be doing that awkward look and saying something like "really...interesting"...and not knowing what to say in return.

 

You wouldn't be going "wow...great career!!"

[lindya]

also i have tried to make friends with other single mums via the internet (i have 3 year old) and as soon as they find out what i do then they cut all contact.

 

What do they do for a living? Claim off the welfare state? Make paper doilies? Skin chickens in a factory? It sounds like you're having fun with your pole-dancing and modelling. You're earning your keep, forming ambitions for your future. Anyone who gets uptight about that maybe just isn't open-minded enough for you to click with.

 

Keep being you, staying open to new friendships and knowing that if people have an issue with what you do for a living that's their problem. It really is, because people like that close themselves off to all sorts of friendship opportunities with interesting people who could enhance their lives.

 

Some people might tease you a bit over what you do for a living. Pole-dancing is the kind of thing you're always going to get a bit of stick about, if you'll excuse the pun - but it would take a pretty mean-minded, prune-munching cretin to freeze a good person out just because they dance tables for a living. A lot of professional women are paying good money for pole-dancing lessons these days. You could bear that in mind for future business opportunities.

 

Oh come on..like if you were talking to her at a gathering and you asked her what she did and she said, "I'm a stripper" or the BS version of it.."I'm an exotic dancers"...you'd be doing that awkward look and saying something like "really...interesting"...and not knowing what to say in return.

 

You wouldn't be going "wow...great career!!"

 

Are you kidding? Most women I know would have 101 questions for her.

[nittygritty]

Oh come on..like if you were talking to her at a gathering and you asked her what she did and she said, "I'm a stripper" or the BS version of it.."I'm an exotic dancers"...you'd be doing that awkward look and saying something like "really...interesting"...and not knowing what to say in return.

 

You wouldn't be going "wow...great career!!"

 

 

No, I honestly wouldn't.

 

Emma's not doing anything illegal. She is earning the most money she can to support her daughter and her self at this time. She is also looking at personal training/nutrition as well. Her daughter comes first in her life. Those are admirable qualities in a person.

 

I cook, wait tables, bus and wash dishes, clean bathrooms, pick up trash in parking lots, scrape gum out from under tables, etc., whatever needs to be done in the restaurants I own because its how I earn money to support my kids and myself. What someone does to earn a living is not necessarily who they are as a person.

 

I respect good parents that work to support their families. Single working parents who get low or no child support that are raising and financially supporting a kid(s) by themselves get nothing but respect from me because I know that it certainly isn't an easy task.

[NYCmitch25]

i have been doing pole/table dancing and glamour modeling on and off for about 6-7 years now. i enjoy it and the money is nice.

it doesnt mean i am thick becuase i choose to do this, i class myself as an intelligent person and i know once i have decided i have had enough of what i am doing now ... there is a whole world full of roads i can go down.

but at the moment i am quite happy doing what i do and looking alot younger then 26 means i can probably do it for a little longer then other people with similar jobs.

anyway... finding it so frustrating lately becuase certain people refuse to even talk to me once they find out what i do and immedietly judge me before they have got to know me for who i am.

 

READ THE BOOK FIRST BEFORE JUDGING IT BY ITS COVER

 

Hello!

 

I'm very sorry that people have pre-judged you in such a way. I BET you are a funny, interesting kind, good hearted person. Perhaps you should try to let that shine through first before you tell them your history?

[mental_traveller]

I don't judge by race but I do judge by occupation due to personal choice. You can't change your skin colour but you can choose your occupation. If you choose to interact daily with people who are ethically or morally challenged, what does this say about your ethics or morals?

 

But what is it that makes strippers "ethically challenged" (I take it by this you mean "wrong" or "immoral")? I don't see how taking off clothes in a club automatically turns someone into a liar, cheat, or a thief.

[sally4sara]

But what is it that makes strippers "ethically challenged" (I take it by this you mean "wrong" or "immoral")? I don't see how taking off clothes in a club automatically turns someone into a liar, cheat, or a thief.

 

And if you were to say that statistically or in your personal experience, strippers are more likely to be involved with immoral or wrong behavior you ARE judging others on assumptions. I'd like to know what Trialbyfire feels would happen if her children played with children from a woman who chose to be a stripper. Would they get lap dances? Would they get an under 12 years old discount?

No. She would simply be denying the kids playtime just to snub the other mother.

[Aintayankee]

Here's my take. I wouldn't feel too inclined to like a stripper. I would maybe want to be a friend, but it is in vain if it goes beyond casual and light aquintances.

 

I'm sure guys like being kind to you. I'm a philosphy person, so it seems pointless. Nice girls do a job, and guys pay for them to come and show their body/moves. I just don't get the point, it wouldn't matter if I ever saw that or not.

 

It is ironic, considering guys really wouldn't mind being in a relationship with a pretty girl, considering evolution is basically hot guys and hot girls having kids and etc.

 

I wouldn't take it seriously, they are nice cause it is what they do, but they are a different person, and just seems all up in the air as far as meaning. They might resent that you get all the attention from guys, so they are cautious to if you even care about them at all, or just putting on customer relations type of thing.

 

Those girls at Hooters might not be b****es in reality, and might act kind to everyone, but doesn't mean anything.

[Aussie65]

Hey it's your choice but not mine.I have far more respect for myself then that and I guess my Mom raised me a whole lot differently.Yeah I would talk to you if I saw you out,I take people as I find them however,I would always have in the back of my mind these oggling desperate men perving at every tiny detail you have and I mean EVERY DETAIL!.

Not for me hun,your life.I am no prude just see there are other jobs out there far more moral then pole dancing.Each to their own.

[rainfall]

they don't get touched??

 

...damn it!

 

don't mind this person emmaUK, rain fall is a Washed-up has been!

 

What makes me a washed up has been? Because I believe the only person who should be naked around someone is their SO?

OK sure .

But tell me if they don't get touched then what exactly do they do in a LAP dance? Stand five feet away....

[Jilly10340]

I have no problem with strippers....actually....I would go to a strip club with my boyfriend if he were so inclined.

 

I DO, however, have a problem with strippers that do side jobs, like having sex in the back room, but I guess that would make them prostitutes?

 

Strip on, sister!

[solitude]

I think they have a bad reputation because of the drug. They are usually portrayed as drug addicts, trashy people, but they are not all like that.

 

I don't think that a banker or a politician or any professinoal who extract money from some funds are better than any stippers/dancers/prostirutes.

 

There are thieves, drug addicts, perverts in every professions on the planet so why judge one person who dance and who could be an honest citizen and a good mother. sheeeshh

[nittygritty]

Go to any college town that has strip clubs and you will find that many of the dancers are dancing to pay for college. Emma is supporting her daughter and she is making good money which probably gives her more time to spend with her daughter. She knows that stripping is temporary and she is making plans for the future.

 

She isn't sponging off of tax payers money on welfare or squeaking by on minimum wage and having her daughter go without having anything.

 

I doubt that anybody on here is eligible for sainthood. You might experience parental snubs yourselves someday for something that has nothing to do with whether or not your a good parent.

[Trialbyfire]

But what is it that makes strippers "ethically challenged" (I take it by this you mean "wrong" or "immoral")? I don't see how taking off clothes in a club automatically turns someone into a liar, cheat, or a thief.

Refer to my earlier post. There are a larger percentage of strippers involved with prostitution, drug taking and organized crime, than your average waitress or banker. The last thing I would ever want my future children exposed to, is watching someone fire up a crack pipe.

[rainfall]

I doubt that anybody on here is eligible for sainthood. You might experience parental snubs yourselves someday for something that has nothing to do with whether or not your a good parent.

 

No stripping doesn't make someone a good or bad parent. However if I ever do have kids a stripper is not someone I would want them to be around because I feel they would send the wrong kind of message to them.

[nittygritty]

No stripping doesn't make someone a good or bad parent. However if I ever do have kids a stripper is not someone I would want them to be around because I feel they would send the wrong kind of message to them.

 

Crappy parents and people come in all professions and so do drug addicts, drunks and child predators.

 

Professional titles aren't a criteria when it comes to who someone is outside of the workplace. I think its more important to take the time to get to know someone before deciding rather than basing it on their resume.

 

My point is that I pay attention to who someone actually is as a person and how they act, not what they do for a living. Unless its illegal.

[emmaUK]

What makes me a washed up has been? Because I believe the only person who should be naked around someone is their SO?

OK sure .

But tell me if they don't get touched then what exactly do they do in a LAP dance? Stand five feet away....

 

 

i dont know where u live but in the reputable UK clubs there is a 3 foot rule with table dancing. we are not allowed to touch the guys at all during a dance and there is security all roudn to make sure dancers stick to the rules. alot of clubs are not not even allowing girls to open legs or bend over. so maybe you should do your research before you judge

[Cobra_X30]

i dont know where u live but in the reputable UK clubs there is a 3 foot rule with table dancing. we are not allowed to touch the guys at all during a dance and there is security all roudn to make sure dancers stick to the rules. alot of clubs are not not even allowing girls to open legs or bend over. so maybe you should do your research before you judge

 

Maybe the focus should be on why.

 

Why are there strip clubs in the first place?

 

It would seem to me that you are allowing men to objectify you! Yes you get paid for it... but you not only allow, but encourage random men to view you only as an object of lust!

 

Does that seem healthy?

[nittygritty]

Maybe the focus should be on why.

 

Why are there strip clubs in the first place?

 

It would seem to me that you are allowing men to objectify you! Yes you get paid for it... but you not only allow, but encourage random men to view you only as an object of lust!

 

Does that seem healthy?

 

 

Buying food and shelter for her kid seems healthy. Are you willing to financially provide for her and her daughter until she finds a job you approve of?

 

Emma is making money dancing naked. I can think of a whole lot worse jobs than that. Septic tank sucker, IRS auditor, criminal defense attorney, proctologist, telemarketer, credit collector, etc.

[Trialbyfire]

Buying food and shelter for her kid seems healthy. Are you willing to financially provide for her and her daughter until she finds a job you approve of?

 

Emma is making money dancing naked. I can think of a whole lot worse jobs than that. Septic tank sucker, IRS auditor, criminal defense attorney, proctologist, telemarketer, credit collector, etc.

I would rather do all the above, than objectify myself. Bring on the vacuum and anal probing tools...

[Road Rage]

People judge you for a variety of things in this life Emmauk get over it. you are not on some some pedestal because you are a stripper. People will judge you harshly because you are over 45 and never been married. AGAIN!!! Get over it. If you want to strip....then strip. JUST DO IT ok???

 

Don`t whine to the world because you are a stripper. You are not the only one one this planet being judged by other people. You think you are special or something? Is that It???

 

You are not. People get judged every day for many, many things. Now...one more time. If you want to strip, just strip. Capice????

[nittygritty]

I would rather do all the above, than objectify myself. Bring on the vacuum and anal probing tools...

 

And thats your choice but everybody doesn't feel the same way that you do. I have never been a stripper but getting paid to be objectified is better than giving it away for free. Women and Men are objectified everyday in advertising, magazines, television, etc. Any job that sells a product or service requires convincing people to give you their money as opposed to someone else.

 

Emma is in the entertainment industry and obviously there is a lot of consumers for that type of business because there are so many stripclubs.

[emmaUK]

f-off roadrage u stupid ignorant d**k.

 

how the F did u come up with that i think im special coz of my original post.... what a warped view.

 

i think im far from special and dont think im no better from the next human being so stop tyiong to come up with the cocky remarks you fkn prat. i have never been more pissed off with a comment before then someone telling me do i think im special. wot a fkn a-hole you are. get stuffed u twit

[rainfall]

i dont know where u live but in the reputable UK clubs there is a 3 foot rule with table dancing. we are not allowed to touch the guys at all during a dance and there is security all roudn to make sure dancers stick to the rules. alot of clubs are not not even allowing girls to open legs or bend over. so maybe you should do your research before you judge

 

Ok but you still dance naked for strangers. You still try to sexually turn on men who you do not know. That is not something I want in my life, my SO's life, or if I ever have a child I would not want them to ever think that kinda thing was OK.

[Aintayankee]

Hey, dont' get mad at all of us on here. Who cares if it is moral or not, but still most people don't think super highly of it. Doesn't mean anything about your character. But they criticize your actions.

 

Doesn't really matter, any of it. Why are you so mad if you know it is what you like to do?

[popey]

no i deff wouldnt encourage my daughter to do it at all....but if she turned round to me and said she really wanted to do it then i would support her becuase telling any one that they cant do something will make them even more determined to rebel and i would want to make sure that if she insisited on it that she was going to do it safe and work with the right people in the right places

 

i know the london industry and would make sure she went to a top venue with strict house rules rather then some back street dive full of dancers who do extras.

 

i would not like it if she went and did it behind my back

 

I'm curious, why you would prefer your daughter not do it. Your profession happens to be a topic that I have alot of internal questions about. I certainly wouldn't assume that you are not someone that I would care to befriend upon learning of your job, but I do (at current) have alot of negative thoughts (very varied) about the industry.

 

So, I'm really interested about your suggestion that what you do makes you happy, and is something you think is a perferctly fine and respectable choice, but at the same time, is something you would rather your daughter not choose.