Lickpicks84 Posted September 15, 2007 Posted September 15, 2007 She moved to a different state, just a few hours away, for college while I remain at home. Things we're fine and I took one visit to her once classes started. However something changed on my visit. The week after she was avoiding me (well at least that's what I felt) and short whenever I talked to her. On that Saturday I asked her if she was mad at me and this started a cascade of texts. To summarize she told me that she was too stressed to deal with a relationship (she plays sports which I imagine takes a lot of time). She said things like "i just can't be a good girlfriend right now and that's not fair to you or me". She says she still likes me but not enough to carry on the relationship, "maybe it will work later". Another notch is that she has competitions each weekend until sometime in November or December. So I would never get to see her. So what does she want? This is my first breakup and it's hard for me. I want to get over her but I keep thinking, what if she wants me back? I plan on giving her space but I think, what if she thinks Im done with her? Augh. Advice, tips? Please!
Curmudgeon Posted September 15, 2007 Posted September 15, 2007 Augh. Advice, tips? Please! I know it isn't easy but I think you should get on with your life. She may come back into it but as it stands now, there are no guarantees so you might be waiting around for nothing.
Author Lickpicks84 Posted September 15, 2007 Author Posted September 15, 2007 She told me that my visit with her "opened her eyes". I offered to call her every night but she said she "didnt have time". She said we never talk, and we never see each other. The problem is she said that I stressed her out on my visit and she can't deal with it right now. She said she's not going to see anyone and maybe it'll work later. If she really means this, then why does she barely talk to me? And I always have to initiate it. Its been a week since she dumped me. I had two or three huge discussions about it (me asking questions, which I know is bad). I didnt talk to her for two days, then I did on Thursday on AIM. Yesterday I posted something on her facebook but she just ignored it. Should I block all communication with her or talk every now and then?
Curmudgeon Posted September 15, 2007 Posted September 15, 2007 I think talking now and then as friends is fine but I wouldn't get heavily and emotionally invested in her. You're both young. There's no rush!
Author Lickpicks84 Posted September 16, 2007 Author Posted September 16, 2007 I'll flesh out my visit. I went there and didnt talk much because I was around a bunch of people I didnt know; I was also pissed for some of the visit (and she noticed). She used that against me after she broke up with me. This is the big hitter for me, it feels like my visit caused the split. The week after it I barely talked to her because I was really stressed about not getting to see her. She said that'd we'd still be close but she never initiates conversation with me anymore. The last chat we had was pretty basic and she seemed distant. How does she go from liking me to not caring anymore? I want to know if I should just ignore her for a few weeks then start up chatting again or what.
Author Lickpicks84 Posted September 18, 2007 Author Posted September 18, 2007 Now that I think about it, this is strange. Saturday night we were in her dorm bed and she was "too tired" for sex (which I believe with a hard practice and no sleeping). But I was pissed and she got sad and teary. She said the famous line "I don't deserve you, I can't make you happy". I replied "yes you do" and kissed her forehead and she thanked me. Now what the heck? I didn't think about it much at then, in fact I thought I did a good move. It's been a few days since I've contacted her. I miss her but it kills thinking that she just doesn't want me. I definitely think I messed up by not calling her when we were together. I messed up even more after she broke up, I got into about 3 huge conversations about it (this is my first breakup). I sent her like a 4 page text and she never texted back. That hurts the most. It isn't better to have love and lost. Not like this.
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